PT speech delayed DS, should I try?

[SammyeGail]

Hi! I have 2.5 yr old twin boys, one has autism and as of now I am not even going to attempt PT until his receptive language gets better.

His brother is speech delayed, but knows tons of words, he just doesn't want to use them, lol. He is getting better every week. I bought a Baby BJorn potty about 6 weeks ago, when he goes with me to potty he sits on it and I tell him about me pottying.

I honestly have no idea what I am doing. I know there are books out there, I start looking and get confused.

He is also allergic to wheat and dairy, so treats are limited. I can do suckers, gummies and skittles.

My big problem is 'sitting time'. I can't sit in the bathroom with him 15 minutes while his brother wanders around the house, kwim? I can once DH gets home, but that would give us 2-3 trys a day, all in the evening. Not very consistant.

Any suggestions? How do you SAHM do it with other kids? How do you working moms do it while your DC is in daycare?

Thanks for any advice, totally lost here......

Samantha

[Gena]

Hi Samantha,

I don't have any advice on how to sit with one son in the bathroom while the other wonders around the house. But I can tell you how I trained DS, who has both receptive and expressive language problems as part of his autism. We used an ABA method of toilet training, which involved first schedule training and then gradually teaching DS to indicate when he has to go. This type of method works well for kids with autism, but I think it's good for other kids too.

We started by just having DS sit on the potty in the evening, either before his bath (if it was a bath night) or before getting into his pajamas. After a few days, he started going pee in the potty at this time. Then we knew that he understood what the potty was for and I started taking him to the potty every hour.

Since DS learns best visually and through written language, we used the book "You Can Go to the Potty" by Dr. Sears to help DS learn what he was supposed to do. We also wrote social stories about going potty and made them pretty explicit. Once DS understood how what we wanted and overcame his initial fear of the big toilet, he decided that he did not want to use little potty anymore and wanted to use the toilet. This made things much easier for me, because DS could use public bathrooms. DS has therapy or related activities every day and there was no way we could have stayed home for days to toilet train.

When it came time to teaching him to tell us that he had to go, we again took advantage of his love of the written word. I had little cards that said "I have to go potty" in every room and taught DS how to go get the card and read it to me when we needed to go. If your son uses PECS, you can use PECS cards the same way. Or if your son signs, you can teach him to use the sign for "toilet".

As for rewards, different things work for different kids. If you use ABA with your other son (I don't remember if you do or not), you probably know how to find reinforcers. Potty training rewards work in a very similar way. Rewards don't have to be food. You can use strickers or special activities too.

We started training last summer, a couple of months after DS turned 3. So it's been about a year since we started and I would say that we are still working on it. For the most part he IS potty trained and has very few accidents. But DS still usually goes on a schedule and has some difficulty with telling me when he has to go. He is getting better at this, but we are still working on it. Also he is not from potty independent due to his motor delays and inability to dress/undress himself.

I think the main thing is knowing when the child is ready and working with him at his own pace. Some kids train in a day, some kids take months.

I hope that helps.

[erosenst]

Samantha -

If you haven't, I'd suggest talking to DS' therapists about approaches that might work with both kids. It may be different for each - but you likely can find ways that work, or at least start working, soon.

My mother worked for years with kids (primarily starting with them as preschoolers) with multiple disabilities. Some were diagnosed as having autism; many more would be diagnosed as being on the spectrum today. A large part of her practice was helping parents learn how to teach "social norms" at appropriate times, including potty training. Her belief was that many parents waited waaaay longer than necessary to start training, as they either thought there was no way their child could learn (when they could, given appropriate methods and appropriate time) or didn't know how to modify an approach to work with their particular child.

And fwiw, we didn't use food as a reward with Abby. She still wrangles stickers or stamps on the hand from us for pooping by herself though (ie going to the bathroom, pooping, wiping, flushing, etc.) So the reward can be anything that's built up as special for the child.

Hmmm....just reread. Hope that made sense...

Emily

[KBecks]

The average age for boys is just over 3 years. I would wait a little longer so you don't end up just frustrating everyone.

I enjoyed a book called Toilet Learning by Allison Mack.

[sidmand]

Gena,

Thank you for sharing your method with your son especially. I've started thinking about this more and more because DS *just* turned three (over the weekend!). He is also starting preschool and starting to talk a little about the potty.

When he turned three his official ABA therapists left (now the school takes over!), but he learns very well visually and I didn't even think about using this way to also teach him about the potty. He's very sensory and I wasn't sure how to start (sensory understimulated in some ways since he doesn't care that he runs around in poop for awhile!).

I'd been thinking about naked time (since it's darn hot now!), but this is probably the better way to go for DS.

Thank you again for sharing!

[sail731]

As a speech therapist, I would recommend trying both boys at the same time. Using visual helpers (PECS symbols, Boardmaker, or even just clip art) to show that it is toilet/bathroom time.

I currently work with very severely involved students with autism in the schools and we use pictures to show them when it is time to go (in their schedule) and also have pictures available for them to bring to us to request needing to go. We try and refrain from using "potty" because sooner than later "potty" is not age appropriate and they have a hard time transitioning.

Rewards can be food, stickers, or any highly motivating object set aside just for rewarding using or sitting on the toilet. Some of our students with autism select match box cars as a reward and are allowed to play for a few minutes after they've gone.

Reading social stories about using the bathroom is also a good way to help teach the concept.

Hope this helps!