S/O- hosting out of town guests- Update around #79

[egoldber]

I would just be like "Oh I am so sorry, but that really does not work for us. Since I can't make you comfortable here, we suggest these nearby hotels xyz."

That was unacceptable. I could see them mentioning she was vegetarian in an FYI sort of way, but that was rude at best.

[elliput]

Friend is bringing his girlfriend, who no one has ever met. girlfriend emails my sister and BIL to say that she is a vegetarian and does not want there to be any meat in the home at all while she is there.

It is extraordinarily rude of a guest to make a demand such as that. If the host were to offer not to have any meat in the house during visit that is entirely different.

Friend and girlfriend are more than welcome to stay at an extended stay hotel during their visit and either cook there or eat out. It sounds to me like the girlfriend does not want to be a house guest and is looking for something to force the issue with your sister's friend.

[Melaine]

OP, has your friend responded yet?

[MontrealMum]

Barring allergy issues (and I doubt it's religious since I've actually seen people with religious convinctions be more considerate than not), I'd respond with, "I'd be glad to host and also offer vegetarian options but we are meat eaters and will not be removing meat from the home. Please feel free to look up XX hotel in town in case this doesn't work for you."

[justlearning]

There's no way that I would want to host DH's friend for nine days (while DH would be at work) under any circumstance. But then add to that hosting someone whom I've never met for that same length of time--I certainly wouldn't have agreed to that. So you sister is WAY nicer than I am.

But now I'd count it a blessing if I were her to be able to make it clear that a hotel would be better suited for them. I wouldn't even give them the option of staying at her home at all at this point if the girlfriend tries to rescind her request. Her lack of respect for their home and lifestyle would make me no longer want to host her at all. I can't believe that she would actually request them to make such changes!

I am very allergic to cats and have severe asthma attacks if I'm ever around them. So I don't stay in anyone's homes with cats--I stay in hotels instead. What if I emailed someone saying that I wanted to stay in their home but that they had to take their cats out of their house and shampoo all the carpets, etc.? IMO her request is almost as absurd.

[mommylamb]

Totally agree with the other posters... that's just rude. I would be more sympathetic if she was just saying by the way, I'm veggie (as in, I don't eat meat, but I'm not telling you what to do), or I keep Kosher (so veggies meals with plastic plates/cutlery are fine). But that just sounds obnoxious.

[DietCokeLover]

Totally agree with the other posters... that's just rude. I would be more sympathetic if she was just saying by the way, I'm veggie (as in, I don't eat meat, but I'm not telling you what to do), or I keep Kosher (so veggies meals with plastic plates/cutlery are fine). But that just sounds obnoxious.

I can never imagine telling someone to rid their home of something before I arrived. Rude, rude, rude.

I am unfortunately a very picky eater,and there are some foods I won't even touch, so sometimes if it is appropriate, I'll have DH say something like, "oh hey, by the way "wife" doesn't like _____, I know I think she's weird too". That way, if that is what is served, I don't have to come across being so terribly rude when I won't touch it.

[trales]

We are vegetarian, and typically let people we are staying with know that, but I would never expect them to accommodate me. I always feel bad telling people we are veggie and always ask that they not go out of their way for us, we will prepare/bring our own food or eat the side dishes, pb and J ect.

I am also severely allergic to cats, close friends I will ask to have the cat put in another room while we are there for an evening. But I would never stay with them, hotels are made for people like me.

[MamaMolly]

I'd 'meat' her at the airport with an open Slim-Jim in my hand.

Ok, only kidding. I'm not THAT inconsiderate though I think that the Girlfriend in this situation *is* that inconsiderate. ITA with the hotel idea. What a twit.

[Corie]

Can you imagine spending NINE days with someone like that? I have a feeling this would be just the tip of the holier-than-thou iceberg.

That is exactly what I was thinking!!! She sounds like a royal PITA.