They've gone from playing not to one pushing the other...

[TwinFoxes]

Well, seemingly overnight they've gone from being the cutest little playmates who would happily share everything, to D not sharing with S, D pushing S, and D pulling her down by her shoulders. S, unfortunately, has always had a flair for the dramatic, so any tiny thing D does results in an Oscar worthy performance. HELP! Moms of older twins, what should I do? I'll literally be sitting next to them as they play, and I have to grab D's little hands as she reaches for S.

And, not only am I worried about D "picking" on S, I'm worried that S's default reaction is to cry at everything. Not just the pushing, but loud noises, D sitting on my lap, the dog not doing what she wants, me going to another room, a tiny fall, anything. The number of time she cries during the day is about 10x the number of times D cries. And getting pushed around by her twin only causes more crying. I think part of the reason is they aren't very verbal at all, so saying "use your words" won't help.

Advice needed PLEASE!

[twowhat?]

I would also be interested in how people handle this. My girls are 15 months now but they have been fighting since 7 months. No joke. I have videos. I don't remember a time when they EVER played "well" with each other. Twin A always picked on Twin B, who would launch into hysterical crying. At first I constantly intervened, then I wondered what would happen if I let Twin B try to "fight back" (which at that age was just hanging onto a toy harder!). Twin B learned to hang onto her toys better in a matter of days. Then...they started biting. And hitting. And headbutting. UGH. Just how many time-outs in a day is reasonable?? I have to constantly referee and re-direct, and it is EXHAUSTING!

[k_null81]

Oh is this what I get to look foward to??? I'm on the edge of insanity as it is with the crying and they aren't even 5 months old yet! I guess I should count myself lucky though becuase they have been sleeping through the night for almost 2 months now give or take.

I can't wait! LOL!

[fivi2]

Unfortunately, I don't have any advice... I think there are some older help! type discipline threads, but I think we all came up empty as far as ideas go.

If it helps, my girls usually take turns being the victim and the aggressor. One will have a run for a month or so, and then it will flip.

We went through biting - it led to immediate time outs (in the crib) while I comforted the victim. (even at 14 or 15 months or so). I can't say that it helped, but it let me comfort the victim without having to deal with the aggressor.

Mine tend to fight more when they are bored. It is hard because they will be playing happily, I will go do something, and then it turns to chaos in a matter of seconds, with no warning!

Sorry! I can't think of any good words of wisdom! (my girls just turned 4)

[Kindra178]

Two what, my story exactly - 15 months as well. People would ask, "Do your twins hold hands?" And I would just smile and say no, while thinking, "No, they don't hold hands, they beat the c$%p out of each other." In my case, one is clearly the aggressor; he is much bigger and taller. He bangs the little one on the head, takes toys away from the little one and he generally thinks the world is his oyster. I don't want to hurt his little spirit, but he has has to learn how to play nice. My older one (3.5) doesn't help, as he loves to get into the tackleing fray.


Gatorsmom, where are you?

[twowhat?]

Two what, my story exactly - 15 months as well. People would ask, "Do your twins hold hands?" And I would just smile and say no, while thinking, "No, they don't hold hands, they beat the c$%p out of each other." In my case, one is clearly the aggressor; he is much bigger and taller. He bangs the little one on the head, takes toys away from the little one and he generally thinks the world is his oyster. I don't want to hurt his little spirit, but he has has to learn how to play nice. My older one (3.5) doesn't help, as he loves to get into the tackleing fray.

Ha, when strangers ask me "are they best friends?" I just say "No, they hate each other" and go on my way, leaving a stranger in the dust with a confused expression.

[Melaine]

Unfortunately, I don't have any advice... I think there are some older help! type discipline threads, but I think we all came up empty as far as ideas go.

If it helps, my girls usually take turns being the victim and the aggressor. One will have a run for a month or so, and then it will flip.

We went through biting - it led to immediate time outs (in the crib) while I comforted the victim. (even at 14 or 15 months or so). I can't say that it helped, but it let me comfort the victim without having to deal with the aggressor.

Mine tend to fight more when they are bored. It is hard because they will be playing happily, I will go do something, and then it turns to chaos in a matter of seconds, with no warning!

Sorry! I can't think of any good words of wisdom! (my girls just turned 4)

ITA! I don't think there is a magic solution for this other than constantly monitoring and correcting the behaviors. It's tough trying to discipline twins!

[TwinFoxes]

ITA! I don't think there is a magic solution for this other than constantly monitoring and correcting the behaviors. It's tough trying to discipline twins!

You're going to laugh, but I thought "Melaine will have an idea"! I guess we all are in the same pickle. Maybe it's a phase?