What do you do with an infant who just won't drink milk

[camomma]

I'm at my wits end. My daughter is 5.5 months and she has this aversion to formula as well as breastmilk. She just don't want to get her mouth anywhere near the bottle or breasts. She's around 15 percentile in her weight and I'm concerned that if she doesn't eat properly she will get underweight. I tried not giving her bottle for a while so she'll take it eagerly when she's very hungry; Result: She's cranky and fussy and still doesn't want to take the bottle. We have this best nanny in the world and even she can't get her to take her bottle now ( earlier she was able to get her to take it).
I'm tired of coaxing and cajoling her to have her formula or breastmilk... by the time she finishes the 3oz that she usually takes in one feeding it is already time for her next feeding ( 2-3 hours). I feel like I'm always trying to feed her. BEfore I had my daughter I used to think how is it possible that a living being is hungry and wouldn't have its food, whats wrong with these moms that they're constantly after their babies to make them eat. Talk to me now ...apparently raising a kid is a lesson in humility and empathy but I digress. Any suggestions for me from "been there, done that" moms?

[smiles33]

Sadly, I don't have any miracle advice but possibly a few tips to try! DD2 hated bottles and would scream and squirm for the entire hour that we dripped 1 oz into her mouth. She fought it hard. Daycare tried to spoon feed her or use a sippy cup, while my MIL just used an eyedropper. Sometimes, after 8 hours with MIL, she would have had 2 oz ALL DAY. That's how I ended up with 600 oz of frozen breastmilk.

Once she got to 6 months old, we made soupy rice cereal for her with LOTS of breastmilk in it. Have you talked with your ped about possibly starting a little earlier on solids? Or any other ideas to get her breastmilk/formula? My DD2 would still nurse at night (I spent 3 hours on the couch every night after work!) so she was still a chunky baby.

Now that she's 9 months old, she's FINALLY take a bottle. All I can say is that this, too, shall pass. One day, when she is a teen, you'll think back to how fussy she was as a baby and smile (I hope!). Good luck!

[JBaxter]

She doesnt have silent reflux does she? Its where the acids come up an burn the throat when she eats. SO in her mind eating = pain. I would REALLY push your ped and could try something like zantac.

[egoldber]

Has she always been small, or is she dropping in percentiles?

Do you breastfeed directly or pump and bottle feed? Will she nurse eagerly and just refuses the bottle? Or will she not nurse or take a bottle?

Have you consulted an LC?

[Wife_and_mommy]

Does she eat at night or while asleep? I had a small child too and after the 3-month mark, it seemed she only ate very small amounts. I also felt like I was constantly feeding her. Long story short, she was like this until age 5. She now, at age 6, eats more than a couple of tablespoons food at a time.

Are you or DH on the shorter side? Thin? After checking out the reflux angle, I would not stress about it. If a serving for her is 3oz., it doesn't sound like she's a large quantity eater. FYI, A child's serving is one tablespoon per year of age so think about how much food that is. Babies also get very distractible in the 4-6 month age range so that plays into it as well.

Big . I know it's stressful but speaking from the other side, you only want her to eat to satiation and no more. Let her tell you when she's had enough so that she's able to read her body signals in the future.

Also, check out kellymom.com for bf info. It was super helpful to me to read that my dd should double her birthweight by 6 months and triple it by a year. She was right on target even if she was small compared to other babies.

ETA: Beth beat me..I've had this window open a while. Listen to her.

[Tondi G]

another thought.... have you tried a bunch of different bottles/nipples? Maybe you could try something with a faster flow?

[slworld]

I absolutely understand your frustation & pain with DD not feeding especially at that young age. My DS was very much the same (on formula). It just took him forever to drink a couple of ounces & by then it was time for his next feed. He did suffer from reflux and was on medication until about 9months at which point his appetite slightly improved. But until then it was really bad. We pretty much spent the entire day trying to feed him. My nephew was even worse, he was not on the charts at all. He had a protein intolerance which was not diagnosed soon enough & he lost a lot of weight. Then he was put on soy for a few months & then back on breastmilk but he just didn't want to feed. Then he was dianosed with severe reflux & put on medication & neocate formula but no improvement still, he just won't take a bottle. His weight just plateaued & the peds got concerned (since the growth of organs could be affected). The nutritionist suggested she start him on rice cereal with neocate and spoonfeed (this was around 4months age). There was no drastic improvement but atleast they were able to get a couple of spoons down his throat. He was soley on that for a few months since his gut was very sensitive (& he had motility issues i.e. food moved very slowly so apparently he was not hungry & could go without eating for hours ... was on medication to improve that too). Then they slowly started adding others foods and now at around 14months he is ok (still very tiny but active).

I don't mean to alarm but just wanted to let you know what my sis did in a similar situation. Also now my sis thinks he would have done better maybe if they just kept him on breastmilk (instead of formula) but at that point all anyone cared about was him putting on weight. So I think the first step should be to rule out reflux and then maybe you could look into starting solids earlier if nothing else works (of course with your peds approval).

[camomma]

Hi,

Thanks a lot for all the advice you have given. It looks like the first course of action would be to rule out reflux. I have noticed that she does a lot of drooling and throws up lot of milk after feeding ( doesn't vomit, just kind of drools back milk instead of saliva)
is that a symptom of reflux. I will surely check with ped but just wanted to talk
to you abt it too.
To answer your questions:
There has been slight drop in percentile, even when we increased the amount of formula on ped's advice.
Recently her weight didn't go up for about 15 days and thats why I got more concerned. Her diet has also not increased in last 2 months so thats another thing bothering me.
I'll definitely check kellymom.com but its good to know that she should be double her birth weight by 6 month. She was 7.1 lbs at birth and she's 13.9 lbs now so I'm hoping she will be double her birth weight when she's 6 month.
Her response is almost same to direct breastmilk, pumped breastmilk and formula. She's more interested in other activities like crawling, sitting, standing or playing with her toys then feeding. She just won't stay latched to me during daytime ( because of her routine maybe ). At nights she does better she needs to be breastfed before sleeping and usually feeds 2-3 times during the night. During days she drinks BM slightly better than formula, but not without resistance.
It is easier to feed her while she's sleeping but sometimes she still closes her mouth very tightly.
We have started rice cereal on ped's advice and she likes it so much. You can give her any amount and she will keep eating until it is of good consistency. If I liquefy it too much she'll still take some but lose interest sooner. Thats another thing that makes me think that she goes hungry because if she can eat that much cereal and still ask for more, it means she does have an appetite its just that she's suppressing it somehow.
right now, she looks at us longingly whenever we have our food. Which makes me wish I could start her on some more variety on solids but DH is against it and thinks that BM and formula is where she will get most nutrition from for her first year.
I think we'll just have to keep at it for 6 more months and hope that it will get better.
Thanks to all for reading my long post and giving good advice.

[maestramommy]

No advice here, but a lady I know told me her baby never bfed more than 3 times a day as a baby. When she was 1 she made the switch to cows milk, and her dd refused it. Turns out she hated milk, and apparently ate just enough to live. That was her take anyway. She still hates milk. She's 26 now, and doing fine.

[DrSally]

What does your ped say. Is there any chance she could have a swallowing disorder?