How do you get DC to ask to go to the potty?

[pomegranate]

So we started potty training last weekend. I took Friday off and we PT'd Friday, Saturday and Sunday. DS did pretty well. There were some accidents, but he will almost always pee (and pooped once!) if I lead him to the toilet and sit him in his potty seat. When he's done, he'll tell me "all done" so that I give him toilet paper to wipe.

My problem is that even though I keep reminding him to tell mommy when he needs to pee, poop or use the potty, he hasn't yet. He never asks to use the potty, only tells me that he's pee'd after he's had an accident.

Any advice on how get DS to tell me when he's gotta go? DS is 34 months and we've been putting on regular underwear (he loves the prints on them), except for pull-ups at nap and bedtime. I've told him he can have Annie & Clarabel (Thomas trains he doesn't have and wants) when he starts telling me he needs to go. Not sure if that's sinking in yet. He just asks for Annie & Clarabel every time he pees.

[Katigre]

I have found with boys (my own and my friends' sons) that they don't often initiate 'i have to go potty' even when they are fully trained - the skill will come with time but I would definitely set regular potty times throughout the day to prevent accidents instead and build his body awareness of when he needs to go.

[JBaxter]

I have found with boys (my own and my friends' sons) that they don't often initiate 'i have to go potty' even when they are fully trained - the skill will come with time but I would definitely set regular potty times throughout the day to prevent accidents instead and build his body awareness of when he needs to go.

So true. Mine went on their own before they asked to go potty. I set a timer for a while then randomly announced potty time throught the day.

[wendibird22]

I had this challenge with DD1. She'd go if we asked but never initiated on her own. We had to go commando for a day (but no accidents to clean up!) to get her to initiate it. Not sure why that worked but it did. To me, taking her to the potty every 20min or 1hr or whatever wasn't really potty training per se. Sure, she'd go potty and we'd avoid an accident, but it wasn't her becoming independent with it.

[Katigre]

To me, taking her to the potty every 20min or 1hr or whatever wasn't really potty training per se. Sure, she'd go potty and we'd avoid an accident, but it wasn't her becoming independent with it.

Once they have bowel control you don't have to take them more often than every 2-3 hours - so it's not a big deal. I really think this tends to be a boy/girl issue b/c I have seen it over and over again with boys who trained at different ages, but are all chronologically the same age (3), needing to be prompted to go potty by their parents .

[pomegranate]

Thanks! Sounds like this might be normal right now for a boy. I'm still taking DS to the potty every 30-45 minutes and he won't go commando either. Further complicating things is that he went to daycare on Monday (after 3 days of underwear potty training at home) and since I couldn't count on the daycare taking DS to the potty that frequently, he's in pull-ups at daycare. I know that many people don't think pull-ups help with potty training but I'm hoping another couple of weekends with just underwear and we can go to school with underwear. I notice DS will pee in pull-ups but also still pee if you take him to the potty.

[Katigre]

Thanks! Sounds like this might be normal right now for a boy. I'm still taking DS to the potty every 30-45 minutes and he won't go commando either. Further complicating things is that he went to daycare on Monday (after 3 days of underwear potty training at home) and since I couldn't count on the daycare taking DS to the potty that frequently, he's in pull-ups at daycare. I know that many people don't think pull-ups help with potty training but I'm hoping another couple of weekends with just underwear and we can go to school with underwear. I notice DS will pee in pull-ups but also still pee if you take him to the potty.

I found that if my DS was back in diapers when he was early on in potty training he regressed with his body awareness. How I solved that was to put underwear on him inside the diaper so if he had an accident he would still have the regular wet sensation and have to 'change his underwear'. I would ask daycare to take him potty regularly- even if it's only every hour that will help. He will increase his 'holding it' duration to over an hour shortly if you keep at the pt'ing.

[HIU8]

DS is 5 and never asked to go potty. I would tell him to go and try (or he would only go every 5-6 hours). Now, he just says "I'm going to the bathroom".

[pomegranate]

I found that if my DS was back in diapers when he was early on in potty training he regressed with his body awareness. How I solved that was to put underwear on him inside the diaper so if he had an accident he would still have the regular wet sensation and have to 'change his underwear'. I would ask daycare to take him potty regularly- even if it's only every hour that will help. He will increase his 'holding it' duration to over an hour shortly if you keep at the pt'ing.

Thanks Katigre! I think those are great suggestions: underwear then pull-up and asking caregivers to take him every hour. I will do that. I so do *not* want him to regress.