Has anyone re-found their missing libido? careful, maybe TMI...

[Tondi G]

You are not alone... I could have written your post! I wish I was on the pill or something hormonal so I could blame it on that but that isn't the case with me. Only time my sex drive was high was while preggo with DS1 and then while I was on Lexapro after DS2 was born. My hubby wishes I would go back on those antidepressants!

[almostmom]

Thanks everyone for your thoughts. I'm glad I'm not alone, while also really want to find something to work with. But community does that a bit.

I do wonder about the birth control thing. I went off the pill when we were trying for our first, and got pregnant the first month we tried, second month off the pill. That was 7+ years ago, and definitely the most sex drive I've felt in the last 10+ years. I didn't totally have that experience when we tried for DD, but I had a 15-month old, so that might have had something to do with it. Now I have an IUD (Mirena), and I do wonder if I should try without it. But I don't want another child, and got pregnant in a heartbeat with our 2, and DH doesn't like condoms (though it might be worth asking again), so it makes me nervous. My periods were regular, so TCOYF methods are an option (we did this before the 2 pregnancies), but I don't know. Something to think about, which I appreciate. Thanks.

And keep the comments coming - they are really helpful and uplifting in a strange way.

[daisymommy]

Liz, we use TCOYF along with pre-filled applicators of spermicide, not condoms (can't stand them either).

[almostmom]

Hmmm, interesting. Can you share any more details on that? or PM me if you prefer? That would be a whole new world to me, and would love to know what you use exactly. Thank you!

[BabyBearsMom]

I used to have a low libido and going off the pill helped a lot (and made it more pleasurable). Since DD was born libido is back in the toilet (no bc pill, probably just nursing hormones). Plus, it doesn't help that the nursing hormones make it very unpleasant/painful. It is definitely an area that upsets me and DH is very understanding but I can tell it hurts him too.

[MontrealMum]

Mine was gone for quite some time, and it got worse after DS was born. Being put on thyroid meds helped some, and like PP giving up the Pill has made a world of difference Unfortunately for DH, he sometimes doesn't know what hit him, but he's learning to roll with it

[SoloMelody]

Did you say Mirena? Mirena caused havoc with my hormones, my sex drive was nill, DH thought that something was wrong with him, he could not get me excited etc ...... Endocrinologist ran a battery of tests and he said my estrogen levels were very very low even if he had caught me at the worst time in the cycle. He urged me to get it out, no more mirena or any bc..... sex drive is back

Its not as spontaneous as before DD but we definately want it more often and DH feels much better that it had nothing to do with him...

[nfowife]

2 thoughts- I had mirena before this pgcy and got it out to get pg- I had no periods on it. Big difference!! It was like night and day those 2 cycles letting my body do it's natural thing.
My friend just got hormone saliva testing at our local natural pharmacy and it showed some deficits, one of which was testosterone so she is using a cream to treat that and said it has made a HUGE difference in her drive and desire.

[almostmom]

Thanks for the input. I talked to DH about the possibility of taking out the Mirena, but it's scary! I don't want to get pregnant, and was just so fertile in the past. How reliable are spermicides? Do people still use the sponge? Any idea what you'll do after this baby?


Thanks!

[westgre]

About the sponge... I have a famaily history of blood clots, so my doctor refused to give me hormonal BC after age 30. I had an abscessed ovary after DD, so the doctor would not place any IUD, for fear of inflammatory pelvic disease. We used TCOYF after DD, but I admit I got lazy about it. Then came DS#1. After DS#1 I was afraid to tie my tube (I only have one, lost ovary and tube from the abscess). So, we used the Today sponge. And then came baby #3. I would not rely on the sponge as BC unless you are ok with the thought of having another. After #3, I tied my tube.
Now, my libido is still pretty low, but I think that has to do with having a full time job, three small kids, and little sleep. It may also be affected by the Zoloft. The only time I "found" my libido was when I was reading some pretty steamy books. That seemed to help me find my desire. I haven't been able to read much lately and my libido is back to nil.
At least we're all in the same boat.