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  1. #1
    PMJ is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Default Why do I have to beg for sex.????

    I hope there is someone out there in my boat. DH could care less about sex. It's been at least 3 months and when I bring it up, he says, "don't foce it, it'll happen"..

    Gosh darn it, what about my needs?!

    His usual excuses are: work, he's tired, work, tired.. and around we go.

    Anyone else experiencing this?

    I'm at a loss as to what to do to make him more 'interested' in sex.
    -------------------------
    Thanks for your time!


  2. #2
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    What happens if you *really* initiate? Any success with a glass or 2 of wine? Sometimes if we have gone a little while it almost becomes easy to forget about. But, when you do it and remember how good and fun it is then it comes back on the menu a bunch. Maybe he just needs a reminder? That's all I've got right now. GL!

    Beth

  3. #3
    hellokitty is offline Pink Diamond level (15,000+ posts)
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    Is he depressed, have thyroid problems or on medication? Those can affect his libido. I'm sorry you are going through this. My DH has had some issues in the past with this and he had thyroid issues and it improved once his levels got better.
    Mom to 3 LEGO Maniacs

  4. #4
    fedoragirl is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    I'm in the same boat, but try several years. We can joke about it at times, and wonder how we managed to have DD, but yeah, I do all the begging, and he doesn't like me initiating..."huge turnoff" so that doesn't help either.
    I never thought about thyroid issues. Yikes! Thanks...I'll mention this to him. I have thyroid issues post-baby, but didn't think men are affected with this.
    3 year old DD
    2 year old DS

  5. #5
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    It could be medical or it could really be stress related. Do you guys get alone time? Did you have this problem before you had your little one? DH and I rekindled things by doing a date night. We did a couples massage, and had a romantic dinner. It really helped.

  6. #6
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    Default

    I think not medical or stress.

  7. #7
    fedoragirl is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by BabyBearsMom View Post
    It could be medical or it could really be stress related. Do you guys get alone time? Did you have this problem before you had your little one? DH and I rekindled things by doing a date night. We did a couples massage, and had a romantic dinner. It really helped.
    We don't get much or any alone time now. However, we had this issue before baby too.
    3 year old DD
    2 year old DS

  8. #8
    Join Date
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    You are not alone. It is a real issue for me, and I'm close to my wit's end about it. I could do it every day, DH would go months in between. He really shoots me down hard when I initiate, so I've stopped doing so.
    Catherine

    Mom to:
    DD#1 3/07
    DD#2 10/08

    and "Bonus Mom" to:
    DSD
    DSS#1
    DSS #2

  9. #9
    tiapam is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    Have you read the missing libido thread:

    http://www.windsorpeak.com/vbulletin...d.php?t=372056

    If you or your partner is suffering from low or no libido, the thyroid is the *first* thing I would want ruled out because it is relatively easy to fix.

    I recommend reading The Thyroid Solution by Dr. Ridha Arem. Here is a link to the table of contents:

    http://www.thyroidwellness.com/table-of-contents.html

    HTH.
    -Pam

    DD: 6 YO
    DS: 3 YO

  10. #10
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    Default

    I don't want to sound cynical and I REALLY don't want to be heartless! But I have several friends who've experienced this - not with husbands, but boyfriends. Who invariably turned out to be gay. It's become sort of a code with us now. If they start dating men who aren't interested in sex, I remind them that nothing good can come of it... Is there any chance?
    Last edited by LadyPeter; 11-19-2010 at 07:07 PM.
    Beaming mom to DS born 10/20/2010.
    The Force is strong with this one.

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