Multiples Club??

[Rio girl]

Hello Moms of Multiples!

I'm expecting twins and was wondering if any of you belong to a multiples club of any sort? One of my girlfriends told me to join so I can get support and maybe even hand me downs? Do any of you recommend one?

Thanks!

[twowhat?]

I'm sure each club is different, but the most active one in my area held meetings on weeknights...usually starting at 6PM and lasting until 8PM...which is, as you'll find out, THE WORST POSSIBLE TIME when you have infant twins (and even toddler twins...it's the witching hour!). So, I never went and let my free trial membership expire. I have a feeling everyone in the club had some sort of hired help enabling them to go to meetings.

Your best bet is to ask around and see if people feel that a multiples club in your area is worth joining.

As for me, I get most of my support online...

eta: I should re-phrase - I get SOME of my support online but most of my support from friends and family, who never question the difficulty of whatever it is we are going through and always offer sympathetic ears and hugs, even if they aren't parents of multiples. I don't have any local friends with multiples.

[TwinFoxes]

I belong to two, one is more active than the other. I feel I get my money's worth. Our meetings are start at 7:30. But we also have mothers nights out, new mom coffees (babies welcome!) and lots of playmates for the kids. Both clubs have online forums. And both clubs have twice yearly consignment sales where you can get rid of your old stuff, as well as get stuff you need for cheap. I wouldn't go in expecting free hand me downs. Every now and again someone offers free things, but like most moms, we either sell our old gear, or give it to friends. Oh, one of my clubs also regularly lists upcoming events happening around town, I find lots of stuff to do through them.

I would at least try it, you can always quit. I love BBB, but the multiples board isn't very active, I like having my moms of multiples forum to turn to.

Congratulations!

[Melaine]

I'm sure each club is different, but the most active one in my area held meetings on weeknights...usually starting at 6PM and lasting until 8PM...which is, as you'll find out, THE WORST POSSIBLE TIME when you have infant twins (and even toddler twins...it's the witching hour!). So, I never went and let my free trial membership expire. I have a feeling everyone in the club had some sort of hired help enabling them to go to meetings.

Your best bet is to ask around and see if people feel that a multiples club in your area is worth joining.

As for me, I get most of my support online...

and

I know a lot of people really love our local club, but it just wasn't a fit for me. I do absolutely LOVE going to the Mothers of Multiples clothing sales!!!

[Momof3Labs]

Our local club is super clique-y (even a friend who has been a member for 4 years is not yet "in") so I don't find the meetings worth my time. But I do keep my membership current just to be able to sell at the 2x/yearly resale - with four kids, I always have a TON to get rid of!! Even if you don't have anything to sell, club members usually get to shop early, which is a huge benefit. Oh, and my membership gets me into another club resale early - that one was even better than our local one last time around!

[glbb35]

I have to weigh in on this. I LOVE my local groups. My situation is similar to TwinFoxes. My two clubs are in 2 different parts of town have different speakers, set ups and support groups. I def. do more with the more local group as they are closer and this year I have been involved with giving back in the way of co-chairing the new/expectant moms group. It is my way of saying thanks to those before me who were there for me. It has been so much fun and although I can see how it would get clicky I just stay away from that. Sometimes just being at a meeting is helping other moms of multiples who are really struggling. When you see other women there who understand their situation better than most it boosts you. We do Moms Night Outs, we get together once a month and do a day outing with the kiddos and then have the monthly meetings. The support groups meet at 6:30 and 7:00 and the membership meetings meet at 7:30 so there is plenty of opportunity to get involved.
I agree you should at least give it a chance. I know there are moms who only time out is the meeting once a month and they need to be there for their own sanity. The BBB is great but face to face is much better in my opinion especially with a multiples situation. You have nothing to loose by trying.

Our groups also have the sale twice a year which is fabulous and such fun!

Good luck!!!

B

DS 03, 06 and twins 09!

[caheinz]

I would try it. If nothing else, they can offer some early support. My local group has "expert" listings, so pretty much anything a multiples mom has a question on, someone in the group can answer. (Our group has active people from expecting to those with multiples who are tweens or older...)

Lori -- defect to my group! (It's the one with a county starting with a D in the title =) ) We have members from other counties, too -- some people who have moved keep their membership with ours!

Oh -- and being a member allows you to sell at the resales and keep more profit than if you weren't.... not to mention getting in to sell the night before the general public.

[RunnerDuck]

Ours had moms from such a huge age range - I mean their kids ranged from in utero to 18 - I just didn't feel it was helpful. As another twin mom said to me, at some point, don't you get over the whole twin thing? Sorry. You have 18 year old twins. Doesn't mean we really have anything in common. I have better luck with a normal moms group, because my kids get play dates and I get more social activity. And with everyone and their brother doing fertility treatments these days, the normal moms clubs have lots of twins, too. (I know not all twins are fertility babies but most are)

[fivi2]

Ours had moms from such a huge age range - I mean their kids ranged from in utero to 18 - I just didn't feel it was helpful. As another twin mom said to me, at some point, don't you get over the whole twin thing? Sorry. You have 18 year old twins. Doesn't mean we really have anything in common. I have better luck with a normal moms group, because my kids get play dates and I get more social activity. And with everyone and their brother doing fertility treatments these days, the normal moms clubs have lots of twins, too. (I know not all twins are fertility babies but most are)

Huh...

I honestly do not care for my local group (at all - I left in a hurry),
but some things in this post kind of jumped out at me.

Honestly, I am more concerned about the twin thing as they get older
and navigate social situations than I am when all I had to do was change
two sets of diapers!

I have identical girls, so maybe that plays a role, but I am terrified of who
gets invited to what party, who gets her period first, who goes on a date
first, how competitive will they be, what about choosing colleges, etc.
Right now at almost Kinder age I wish I had local twin moms to talk to about
class placement in school (together or separate).

I could see a hypothetical twin group becoming much more helpful as we start
to run into social and academic areas. I don't see myself ever
"getting over the whole twin thing" - it is something that will play a role in our
lives for many years to come - it doesn't define my kids, but it is most certainly
a part of who they are.

[RunnerDuck]

I dunno, to me right now they're babies, with the same needs. As they grow, I don't expect them to do the same things and have the same needs. They're two different people. I can see that now. I am pretty sure I know which will be the early bloomer, which will be the more outgoing, etc. I think less and less of them as twins as they get older. To an extent I think it will be helpful to NOT think of them as twins, to NOT have the same expectations, so that going on different paths won't seem an issue. But that's just me. To me, twin 2 year olds, and twin 18 year olds, are really very, very different. While the 18 year old twins' moms might remember what it was like back then, to me, it's more helpful to be with moms who are going through that now, be it with one baby or two.