I am only 5 wks pregnant now so I know it's way early to be asking about L&D issues except that I need to choose a hospital so I can choose an OB. I have an appt scheduled but I am still angry about my delivery with my son and I need to know if I should be or not so I can decide if I should switch OBs and go to another hospital or not.
I labored great at home using Hypnobabies and being in my tub. It's a blur now but my contractions were coming faster and harder and I think my DH insisted we go to the hospital when they were somewhere around 3 to 5 min apart. We checked in around 10 PM. At my first check I think I was between 5 and 6 cm dilated and still doing great with the labor naturally. Then everything went downhill. The guy who came to take blood messed up my arm badly jabbing and didn't get any blood and then jabbed my other arm badly and I never recovered my focus after that. At my last check drug free I was 8 cm and from reading up on this after I believe I was entering transition. I was hysterical and begging for drugs and got an epi.
I think about an hour or so later my Dr. came in and checked me and told me she wax going off to do a C section and would come in after to deliver me. Then the nurse came over and said it was almost time to starr pushing but I told her I didn't feel the need to push and wanted to avoid purple pushing and the consequences of pushing too soon. Then a different nurse came in and said it was time to push and the baby was right there so of course after that I said ok. I ended up pushing for 3 hours and needed oxygen, ended up with purple pushing, and at some point the Dr. threatened to do an episiotomy which made me so upset and I begged her not to as I had told her so many times not to do one. My DH told me after that after saying that she told him she always says that to get moms to push harder.
at the very end the baby's heart monitored showed decels and the Dr. hit the panic button and a bunch of other nurses came in, forget the name of the unit but when baby is at risk and may need special attention. Then she did the episiotomy and out came my son. Healthy and great Apgar scores.
So I know the natural labor failure was my fault but should I be angry at being forced to push too soon? Wouldn't my body have labored down on it's own and ended up with less pushing? Is my having the epi completely to blame?
My son was 9 lbs 4 oz 21 1/2 in long and head in 90 th %. My ped was shocked I didn't have a c section because of the size of his head. Was an epiosotomy really necessary? My son was certainly big but what about everything I read that tearing is better? I have had so much pain and discomfort from it. I know I'll never know how tearing would have felt for better or worse but I'm angry about it.
Please tell me honestly what you think. Should I be angry at the OB and nurses and switch? Or was it the fault of the epi and size of my baby? Thank you so much!!