sad about the gender that never was?

[elliput]

I'm also going to say it's a totally normal feeling, and that it's okay to mourn the loss of what could have been.

[Puddy73]

Yes, every time, but particularly with DD2 because she will be the last. I wasn't sad about having a girl, just a little wistful about never having another boy.

[BabyMine]

Totally normal and don't feel bad for feeling that way. With #1 I kinda wanted a girl because I had NO idea about raising a boy or boy parts. When I had him I got comfortable quickly and was fine. Then we found out we were pregnant with #2. I could have sworn I was pregnant with a little girl. I knew this was our last child and when I found out it was a boy I was sad. I really wanted a little girl to do the things I grew up doing with my mom. I mourned the life I thought I would have with a daughter. What helped is that I remember myself as a hormonal teenager and wonder how she survived. I couldn't be happier with the 2 boys I have now but I would be lying if I told you I didn't still wonder and get a little sad.

[MSWR0319]

This is one of the reasons I didn't want to find out what we were having. I figured if I found out at delivery I wouldn't have time to be overly upset about it. I'm glad DS was a boy but if I had found out he was a boy beforehand I would have been upset he wasn't a girl. If we have another one I'm afraid if we find out Earl I'll either be sad it wasn't a girl because I'll never have one or sad it wasn't a boy because DS won't have a brother. So I thi k it's totally normal to be a little sad.

[amm40]

I absolutely agree with everyone who has said it's normal, and want to add that in my opinion this is the reason I'm glad we don't get to pick! I would never stop second guessing that choice...

[larig]

I absolutely agree with everyone who has said it's normal, and want to add that in my opinion this is the reason I'm glad we don't get to pick! I would never stop second guessing that choice...

Wow, I can't imagine having to make that decision. That would be impossible.

[veronica]

It is completely normal. I am still struggling this time. There are boards out there for gender disappointment and it is a common feeling for a lot of parents.

Both DH and I wanted a little girl and our first was a DD. For our second, we would have been fine with another girl but were totally open to experiencing the joys of a boy. We did find out early and it was a boy and we were totally fine.

Going for #3, we wanted to make sure that it was a third child and not another girl was what we wanted. When we decided that, we went for #3. We soon found out it was twins and the chances of one being a girl are pretty high (75%), so we were kind of excited. We found out we are having two boys and it has been very tough for me. It's one thing to adjust to the thought of having twins, especially when we were financially ready for only one more at this time. but, mourning the thought of not experiencing a baby girl has been extremely hard for me. I only thought I would ever have one child and continue with my career. Now, we are here , soon to have 4DC's and have contemplated #5 already......

Hugs to you momma. Take whatever time you need to adjust and remember that your feelings are ok.