Get this baby OUT!

[Katigre]

If your baby is bigger, the position of the baby and your pushing pattern will both affect your tearing - if you push for a longer period of time (45 minutes vs. 5 minutes) and your dr. uses warm compresses while you push that can help your skin expand. Also google varoius pushing positions - some carry less risk of tearing than others.

Good luck - your baby will be here before you know it!

[sewarsh]

I know this goes against the Board norm, but I went into my appt on my due date and told my OB I thought my vagina was going to explode (which I really did!). I was 3cm dilated that week - had been dilating for 3 weeks - but I asked if they would please induce me and so they did the next day. He was 8.10. My DD was 6.10. I'm only 5'0'' and 120lbs normally so having a baby any bigger than 8.10 would certainly freak me out so I understand.

Good luck.

[Edensmum]

If you ant the exam that's for you to decide, of course but if you have dilated you can stay that way for weeks and if not you can have the baby that day still. It's an invasive exam that literally tells you nothing. If it gives you comfort, then get it, but if it will cause more stress, skip it. I'm all for standard medical care when there is a benefit, but this one is really a convention that offers no medical benefit or info.
As for the tear, the way you push and protect your perinium has more to do with it than size often. Also second births are often way easier on you than firsts. You can discuss this with your doc, warm compresses/supporting the tissue and waiting until you feel the urge to push can all really help.
Try to relax, that will help labor start and you know the usual things. Hope the update is you holding your baby in the next day or so!

[KrisM]

About the cervical check...I dunno exactly. I guess I just generally prefer to go along with standard medical practice/advice unless I have a particular reason not to. And I also think that *if* I do happen to have started dilating by then, it'd be encouraging to know. I won't be devastated if I'm not--I know things can change quickly, but it would encouraging to know if things have started moving in the right direction on their own.

Would it be encouraging still if you were 4 cm dilated and still pregnant next week? To me, that would be worse - thinking it's soon and it not being soon!

I did have a check at my last appointment with DD, 2 days before she was born. I was 'fingertip' dilated at that point and it was 12 days over. I went into labor on my own about 36 hours later. My cousin drove 3 hours to my wedding and she was 3 cm. Her child was born 3 weeks after my wedding. So, it really can go either way.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I guess the thing with the checks (and lots of other birth things- eating in labor, IVs, monitoring, position for delivery...) might seem like non negotiable and done because they have valid medical reasoning. But sometimes they just don't. The practices that have different policies (like I could eat in labor, monitoring was intermittent, no IV, any position I wanted and I could decline internals) aren't being dangerous. They just look at risks/ benefits a different way. And even the mainstream practices that do internals at every appt., for example, probably wouldn't bat an eyelash if you asked to skip one. Sometimes they just don't give choices but choices almost always exist.

eta- sorry to ramble! My first ds1 was 8lbs 5oz at 42 weeks. Later doesn't have to mean bigger, as others have said. GL and lots of labor vibes coming your way!!! If you are GBS- and have an appt. soon, maybe go ahead with the internal and get your membranes swept?

Beth

[misshollygolightly]

I guess the thing with the checks (and lots of other birth things- eating in labor, IVs, monitoring, position for delivery...) might seem like non negotiable and done because they have valid medical reasoning. But sometimes they just don't. The practices that have different policies (like I could eat in labor, monitoring was intermittent, no IV, any position I wanted and I could decline internals) aren't being dangerous. They just look at risks/ benefits a different way. And even the mainstream practices that do internals at every appt., for example, probably wouldn't bat an eyelash if you asked to skip one. Sometimes they just don't give choices but choices almost always exist.

eta- sorry to ramble! My first ds1 was 8lbs 5oz at 42 weeks. Later doesn't have to mean bigger, as others have said. GL and lots of labor vibes coming your way!!! If you are GBS- and have an appt. soon, maybe go ahead with the internal and get your membranes swept?
Beth

Thanks, Beth :-) Yeah, the other reason I'm leaning toward having the cervical check is that I figure any poking around down there at this point might be helpful in terms of getting things started I dunno...I'll give it some more thought between now and my appointment tomorrow. Mostly, though, I'm hoping she'll just come on her own today!

[ashleybama24]

I always have to remind myself that women have been birthing babies for thousands of years ands it's only in the last century that we have started to do it at hospitals, with regular doctors visits and endless options for medical intervention.

Women routinely give birth at home, in cabs, or even the jungle. And all babies come out eventually....she can't live in there forever! When you think over the course of a lifetime we are pregnant 1% of the entire time it doesn't sound so bad. We spend more time on hold or waiting in lines! I know how frustrating it is...DS was 10 days late and I'm 34 wks preggo with #2. But I'm trying to enjoy people giving up their seats for me, getting to play the pregnant card with DH or family, and being 25 lbs overweight but getting to show it off in form fitting clothing! Enjoy these last few days of sleep and hopefully she comes out soon!

[vonfirmath]

I always have to remind myself that women have been birthing babies for thousands of years ands it's only in the last century that we have started to do it at hospitals, with regular doctors visits and endless options for medical intervention.

That is not quite so reassuring when you also think about the high mortality rate for both women and babies throughout history during childbirth and shortly thereafter.

As recently as President Theodore Roosevelt, he lost his first wife from childbed fever.

[daisymommy]

Just a quick note: I was dilated at 5cm. for a full month, walking around living life, will all 3 of my kids! So, yeah, exams won't tell you everything

[SnuggleBuggles]

That is not quite so reassuring when you also think about the high mortality rate for both women and babies throughout history during childbirth and shortly thereafter.

As recently as President Theodore Roosevelt, he lost his first wife from childbed fever.

except that things really aren't amazingly better, in some respects. Our rates of infant and maternal mortality suck in this country compared to its peers.

Beth