is this PPD? or something else?

[carolinamama]

Sounds very similar to how I was feeling after DS2. Overwhelmed, isolated, and in a rut I couldn't even contemplate getting out of. I saw my gp, got on meds (that I didn't want to take but knew I had to or else things were going to be really, really bad) and started working on me. It was a dark, dark time but here I am feeling much better and back to my laid-back, content self. Having kids is so hard and having them close together is even harder. Everyone has different limits and needs so don't feel badly about having help and still feeling overwhelmed. I am not supermom, nor super housekeeper and I have had to come to terms with it.

Many, many hugs coming your way.

[eh613c]

I think it very well could be PPD. These are the exact symptoms my midwife told me to watch for. She said PPD could come up to 12 mo after delivery. I would think either dr could help you. Hang in there and hopefully you'll start feeling better.

You should definitely get help immediately. Either doctor will be able to help you. The earlier you get treatment, the better....for you and your family.

Good luck.

[7pages]

I agree. I had PPD with DD3 and none of my others. I felt heavy inside if that makes sense, and just sad and unmotivated. Medication helped, once I got the correct dose. Be patient with yourself and the meds if you need them. I continued nursing my daughter while on the meds and the doctor said it was fine. I was on Zoloft. Just make sure they know you plan on continuing to nurse and they can find the best fit for you.
Hugs to you!

[♥ms.pacman♥]

thanks everyone for the replies. i do think i'm going to start by talking OB about this. it does really seem tied to my hormone levels. i do feel like i'm experiencing other hormone-related sideffects recently to bfing and being post-partum (hot flashes, major bloating, extreme hunger, feeling like i'm PMSing all the time) that probably isn't helping things either.

and lizzywednesday, i totally hear you re: the part with being upset about how the newborn bonding time being shadowed by hospital visits etc. i am still not totally over the fact that DD had to spend the first month of her life in a hospital, and for the first 3 weeks it was all focused on trying to get her to eat and just hoping that she would breathe normally and would stop having apnea/brady episodes. even though dd was a fairly late preemie (34/35 weeks) it was a *completely* different experience from DS's birth and it took a while to come to terms with that.

[blue]

You've gotten great advice - just wanted to send a

[Beth24]

Sending you a huge hug as well.

[boogiemomz]

More hugs, and more encouragement to see the doc. This is not something you can talk yourself out of.

I completely relate to being disappointed in some of the newborn experiences that were beyond your control. I had a lovely birth experience with DD, but was socked with serious health problems myself shortly thereafter and as a result my time taking care of my newborn was vastly different from what I wanted. I still struggle with it sometimes, and have been struggling with some of the same things you're describing recently. My IRL friend was talking to me and encouraging me to try celexa too (funny that a PP mentioned that!), and I have an appt to talk to my GP about it next week.

I hope you can get in to see someone soon too, get feeling better, and start enjoying your sweet babies again. Keep us posted.

[alirebco]

I would definitely talk to your doctor about it but I did want to ask you if you are exercising at all. Exercise is a natural antidepressant and really helps with both anxiety and mood. Also, it will help with sleep problems.

DH and his whole family suffer from depression and anxiety and they all need to exercise almost every day in addition to taking meds. You will see results faster from that than from meds which can take 2-3 weeks to get into your system. It's worth a shot.

I have also suffered from long time insomnia and other sleep issues and found that working out helps get me to sleep faster and stay asleep.

Good luck and I hope you start feeling better soon.

[AnnieW625]

I would talk to you doctor, but I would have the sitter come an additional morning a week too or if you think that afternoons would be better then do an afternoon too. Good luck!

[lizzywednesday]

...

and lizzywednesday, i totally hear you re: the part with being upset about how the newborn bonding time being shadowed by hospital visits etc. i am still not totally over the fact that DD had to spend the first month of her life in a hospital, and for the first 3 weeks it was all focused on trying to get her to eat and just hoping that she would breathe normally and would stop having apnea/brady episodes. even though dd was a fairly late preemie (34/35 weeks) it was a *completely* different experience from DS's birth and it took a while to come to terms with that.

The PTSD over that doesn't help ... and I only had ONE infant to manage with DD! I just have a tiny glimpse of what you went through with your DD being a preemie, so I know a tiny bit of how it feels to spend that time pumping and traveling and talking to doctors and whatever.

Sending big huge hugs to you & your family while you get help; you're a great mom for asking for help!