10 1/2 mo old, up every 3 hrs to bf

[avalonmom]

Hi, My son is 10.5 mo old and is up about every 3 hrs to bf. I put him to bed at 730, he's back up at sometime between 1030-1130- eats and goes back to sleep and then back up at 230 and 545. At 545 I bring him back into bed with me to get him back to sleep so I can get more sleep (he won't go back into his crib at this point). I'm a teacher and just started back to work after having the summer off but his schedule has been the same at night. Unfortunately, now he only gets one short one hr nap as he won't really nap very well at day care. At home he will take an hour morning and a two hr afternoon nap- but only if I lay down with him and bf him to sleep and if he wakes up in the middle of the nap. He will not nap in his crib.

The dr says he has no nutritional need to eat at night and I should stop feeding him when he wakes and let him cry, but the Am Assoc Ped book I read said he should be getting 24 oz of milk a day. He only gets about a max of 10 oz at daycare, so I continue to get up with him since he is eating when he gets up. My question is- has anyone else experienced a similar schedule still with a 10 mo old? Should I cut out a night feeding (230?) so we can get more sleep? I don't want my milk to diminish or him to not get enough as he only eats a bit of solids (not really liking baby food and only eats a few of the solids I've tried). Alot of folks are telling me my baby should be sleeping through the night by now.
Thanks for any advice or commiseration!

[BabyBearsMom]

We cut DD off of her night feedings at about 5 months. Your LO will compensate by eating more in the day. Right now, your kiddo is reverse cycling (eating a ton at night and not eating much in the day), and I'm sure some other Moms who experienced that can chime in on that. When I stopped DD's night feedings, she was going down at 7, eating at 10, eating at 2, and eating at 5:30. I started by dropping the 2am feeding at first. When she woke up to eat, my DH would go in at 2 and settle her back down, give her a paci, rub her back etc. If I went in and she smelled the milk, forget it, she was up, so it had to be DH. Within 2 days of this, she stopped the 2am wake up. After a week or 2 of that, we stopped the 10pm wake up too. We had a few weeks where she started waking up at 5 instead of 5:30 because she was hungry, but I slowly pushed her, making her wait for the food for 5 or 10 minutes at a time, until she started waking up between 6 and 6:30.

As for naps, it takes time for babies to get used to napping at daycare. It is louder and different than home. It took my DD several months to get into the swing of things nap wise at daycare, which was tough. But now she is a champ and sleeps 2.5 hours a day every day (she is 17 months) and even sleeps on a cot at daycare instead of the crib (she didn't like being in the crib when the older kids got to sleep on the cot so they transitioned her).

[Minnifer]

My DD BF every couple of hours until I nightweaned her at 14 months (using a CIO type method). A lot of people were telling me that babies outgrow it on their own, but I kept waiting and waiting and waiting . I think it's common for BF babies not to sttn without some help learning how - it's a lovely habit to have a yummy snack and cuddle in the middle of the night, why give it up, lol! I would agree that your DS doesn't need to be getting his nutrition in the middle of the night anymore and that he will compensate and eat more during the day, once he gets out of the night waking habit. GL!

[Kira's Mommy]

My question is- has anyone else experienced a similar schedule still with a 10 mo old? Should I cut out a night feeding (230?) so we can get more sleep? I don't want my milk to diminish or him to not get enough as he only eats a bit of solids (not really liking baby food and only eats a few of the solids I've tried). Alot of folks are telling me my baby should be sleeping through the night by now.
Thanks for any advice or commiseration!

It was DD exactly. She didn't show any signs of "outgrowing it". I wasn't prepared to do CIO with her, it just felt wrong for her personality. I also felt that I was done with night feedings. I enlisted DH to get up at night for several nights in a row. At this age she was already mature enough not to get terribly upset about daddy picking her up (tried it when she was younger, didn't go well). It took approximately 4 - 5 days before she realized that the buffet is closed at night and there is no point to wake up. She started sleeping a lot better. She starting feeding better during the day too.

Good luck! And I personally don't pay much attention to what other people say babies "should" be doing at certain age, especially when it comes to sleeping. They don't know your baby. If both of you are fine with continuing night feedings, go for it. When either of you is ready for a change, make a change.

[Katigre]

There are a few schools of thought on this (see above). For me, I coslept and night nursed every 3ish hours until my kids were past a year old. There were several reasons I did this:
1. I was well-rested b/c I never had to get out of bed. Our sleep cycles synced such that I stirred when the baby did, latched them on, then fall immediately back to sleep.
2. It kept my periods away until well past 1 year post-partum (health benefits as well as extra insurance against an earlier pregnancy (we used other BC too)).
3. It was a nice way to reconnect and bond at nighttime - DH and I liked having the baby in our room and bed

I know that my kids were genuinely hungry at night at 10.5 months old and I was fine with nursing them then (we didn't do CIO). As they got into toddlerhood I gradually nightweaned them and it was very clear which feedings were habit vs. which were hunger.

This approach may not work for you, but it was a good approach for us .

[DrSally]

Yes, DD woke up ever 2.5-3 hrs at night until she was 16 mo old. I kept going to her b/c I didn't want her to wake DS up w/his crying and it was just easier for me. Looking back, I should've stopped long before that. It was just that she was naturally waking and wanted soothing to get back to sleep. I had to let her cry, but it was only for one night, and then I actually got to sleep through the night (well, until 5:30am at least).

I was/am at home, though, and she could nurse whenever she wanted during the day, so I wasn't concerned she was getting enough. You could try encouraging him to nurse more during the day, do some cluster nursing in the evening, etc, and see how that works out?

ETA: I do have to say that I kind of enjoyed the nighttime feedings, b/c it was literally the only time I got to hold and focus on DD in complete peace wo/any other distractions. However, it did wonders for my mental and physical health to be getting uninterrupted sleep.

[hoodlims]

I agree with BabyBearsMom. You baby is not eating so much during the day because he is eating a ton at night. It is up to you what you want to do at this point. It is a good age to cut the nighttime feedings as it will also increase good mealtime habits during the day with table foods. Unfortunately, you may have to let him CIO, which is not as awful as it sounds. Many parents think you just let your kid cry straight for 1 hour in their bed while banging their heads, but in the Ferber book there is a strict schedule for crying it out and how to approach it. I would check the book out if you are interested. Or, you can let it continue on until...you are fed up.

Most people I know who are ok with night feedings, co-sleeping, and against parent led weaning or CIO are still doing it with their 2 year olds. They are tired but they enjoy it, so it works for them. I have no judgment either way, I just think you need to figure out what you are ok with and stick to your plan. I knew for a fact that I was not sleeping well while my baby was eating during the night, or even during our month of trying out the co-sleeping. So I made the decision to Ferberize her and have been VERY happy and well rested ever since. She started sleeping 9hrs a night at 3 months, which has now increased to 11.5. She is nearly 21months now.