DS2 is a handful -- he is 4.5. This is not new. I am losing my ability to handle him. He hits, pinches, kicks, tips tables, throws things at me or others. He says stupid mommy, idiot mommy, and on and on. No amount of time outs, sent to his room, removal of toys, no TV manages this. He seeks negative attention. Starts fights with DS1, with the dog and with me.

This morning it was him not wanting a coat or sweatshirt (I was not making him wear it just taking it to school) and he pitched a total fit. Ok fine. After 10 mins of trying to get him to buckle himself into his car sear (or me doing it) we went to school. He refused to hold my hand crossing the street so I took his wrist and he flipped out and tried run into the street. I picked him up and took him across the street. He kept flipping out (hitting scratching trying to get away and RUN BACK INTO THE STREET) so I carried him into school. As soon as we got into school he was fine.

This is my life every single day. He has epic meltdowns and often. It is impacting my life in a negative way. I am not as good a parent as I want to be and it is impacting my relationship with DH and DS1 as well.

So what do I do? I have a teacher meeting next week and I told the teacher this morning I wanted to discuss DS2's behavior with her. I feel like I need an evaluation or some parenting class for kids like this or SOMETHING.

Please advise. I am posting here because to me this seems OFF. It just isn't in the normal range for me. DS1 has his moments however nothing as sustained as this and nothing that I couldn't eventually come up with a plan and figure out.