I like beets.
once a week
once a month
once every 6 months
once a year
Never
I like beets.
DD - 8
DS - 5
No you are not. I cant imagine not doing it - its just part of the game in my bedroom.
This poll makes me think differently about the men I've known to occasionally step outside of thier marriage. If thier wives arent willing to give them what they want they will get it elsewhere and from my personal sampling of men the percentage of men who do not want a blow job is no where near 30%.
I selected once a week but it's actually more than that. It's pretty much every time we DTD and I enjoy doing it.
DD1 September 2008
DD2 March 2011
A couple of times a month here (both giving and receiving). Sometimes it's to completion (like last night), and other times it's just foreplay. When I'm ovulating, it's sometimes just easier to do the whole oral thing (for both of us) than deal with condoms. It's part of our normal sex routine. We used to do it more often (as foreplay every time we dtd), but I'm too lazy for us to clean up before hand. (yes, if we are doing anything oral, we rinse off down there first.)
I should show this to dh to make him realize how lucky he is.
So, it makes you understand and empathize with men who have cheated on their wives because they didn't get "what they want" in the bedroom?
I don't "get what I want" in the kitchen, or in the garage, or in the backyard sometimes. Would it be okay for me to cheat on my husband because he's not meeting my requirements as a handyman, a cook, or a landscaper? I mean, I see other husbands who fill those jobs very well and do better in areas where mine does worse. I chose and committed to the man I married, for better or worse. He used to cook for me when we were dating. That ended almost immediately once we were married. I didn't realize this gave me the right to look around and step out on him.
And if this doesn't resonate as an apples to apples analogy, well, we don't have sex as often as I'd like either. If I can't get him to get in the mood more often, I don't think this gives me permission to go out and get laid elsewhere. Maybe if I put aside the other 90% of the positive that my marriages provides in my life and for my children. Because that's what I would be throwing away if I decided sex was more important than all of that and he found out I had an affair. I wonder if my sons would understand.
Kristen
mama to 3 wild and crazy boys - ages 16, 13 and 11
Since we have next-to-no "alone time" this has kind of taken a back-burner, so I voted "every 6 months" but it would be more frequent if DD would sleep in her own bed.
Also, I don't particularly mind doing it, but it's hard to offer if he's not inclined to reciprocate.
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Liz
DD (3/2010)
"Make mistakes! Get messy!" - Miss Frizzle
I have to agree. I'm completely shocked at the attitude that perhaps cheating is justified if one's spouse doesn't fulfill every desire, sexual or otherwise. AshleyAnn, correct me if I am wrong, but weren't you cheated on? Do you feel that your behavior earned it? Even if it DID, does that render the cheater blameless? Absolutely not, IMO.
What about physical limitations? I have a friend with TMJ who cannot perform oral sex without extreme pain. Should she offer it to her husband weekly to retain his faithfulness? What about someone who has an abusive past and finds oral sex to bring on flashbacks and panic attacks? Should she endure that constantly for fear of losing her husband?
I just find the attitude that men can't, or shouldn't have to, control their sexual appetites and that fidelity is strictly dependent on sexual satisfaction to be detrimental to healthy relationships. Where is the trust?
ETA: I want to add that I voted "once a week". I just can't stand the thought of my daughters growing up and being in a relationship where they feel pressured to do something in the bedroom that they don't want because they are afraid of being cheated on. And to have that mindset perpetuated by women....really really gets to me.
Last edited by Melaine; 06-10-2012 at 09:29 AM.