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  1. #1
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    Default DS Resisting Nap, Lock in his Room?

    DS is 28 months. We're having a big struggle with naptime. Over the past couple wks there are days he doesn't nap at all.
    I've read various articles and expert opinions, etc. I understand it's perfectly fine to have "quiet time" instead, some kids just give up the nap this early (ugh). If they stay in their room it's still restful. Much needed time for both DS and me.Our naptime is a mini version of bedtime; low lighting, stories, song. I lay down with him (but don't stay until he falls asleep; I don't want him to rely on that y'know?)

    However, many times he refuses to stay in his room. He opens the door, peeks out, even sneaks down the hall, into other rooms, etc.

    I know there's advice out there to simply go back in, calmly, hold their hand, walk them to bed, go in again and again and again. But I feel like he will always outlast us. That becomes the game. If we don't go back up there, he creeps his way out, down the hall, downstairs, etc. He's testing us.

    Sometimes we give up and lock him in, although I hate doing this. It's the only way to keep him in there. He objects and yells and screams for varying lengths of time. Some days he eventually falls asleep in his bed on his own, but some days he stays awake - up to 2 hours! There are toys in there... I want his room to be an enjoyable place so I do not want to take everything out.

    Any BTDT? I really don't like locking him in - on the other hand, it's just like an expanded crib. I'm going round and round in my head.

    Sidenote - we sometimes have to lock him in at bedtime, too. He doesn't respect our "rule" that naptime and bedtime he has to stay in his room with the door closed.

    Frustrated.
    Sarah

    DS1 8/2010
    DS2 11/2012

  2. #2
    rin is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    We tell DD that if she keeps the door closed, I won't put the latch on, but if she opens the door, I'll have to latch it shut. This, somewhat surprisingly, actually works most of the time.

  3. #3
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Because of the risk of emergency, I'd never lock the door. I'd feel a little better about a fate at the door.

    However, I'd be inclined to ignore. Bed time and nap time was/is a "see you later" affair after our (simple, short) routine. I say I'm off duty.

    We have toys in their rooms too. Lots of playing before any sleeping happened. I remember ds1 playing for 1-3 hours then napping.

  4. #4
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    Thanks. Ignoring is a new approach I hadn't thought of. He'd come all the way downstairs, potentially, lurking around waiting for a reaction. So I wonder if he'd find his way back to his room or play anywhere he wanted.
    Did that happen to you?

    I should also add - once he does fall asleep, I unlock the door so he's free to come out whenever he wakes up.

    rin - I have made that deal as well, but so far he always opens it. I sometimes wonder if he's only opening it to see if I've locked it or not, but then I have to make good on my end of the deal and go ahead and lock it.

    I know other folks put a babygate right outside the door, but I haven't figured out what good that does. Now the door is open, but they're still contained/locked in. Do they just prefer to see out? Less mentally straining on them?
    Sarah

    DS1 8/2010
    DS2 11/2012

  5. #5
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    He'd go back go his room.

  6. #6
    kaharris83 is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    We have a babygate in front of DS1s door. He would let himself right out our front door if he had free reign in the house I think. We shut his door when we put him down for nap or at night but he usually opens it. He will stand at the gate and talk to us but he doesn't cry or scream. He went from 4 hour daily naps in his crib to only napping 2-3 times a week for 2 hours at most when we switched to the big boy bed. We do put him in his room daily for "quiet time" though and hope he chooses to take a nap.


    ETA DS1 has a train table in his room and I agree I don't mind him playing in there by himself to give us both a break. Like SnuggleBuggles I don't make a big deal about nap. Read one story and I'm off duty, well I was. Now DS2 is here so I'm still on duty for him. I see our boys are similar in age.
    Last edited by kaharris83; 12-15-2012 at 05:31 PM.
    DS1 July 2010
    DS2 November 2012

  7. #7
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    K - you had me laughing outloud about going right out the front door. Sounds like our DS1s are very similar, age and all!

    We, too, have a train table in his room, and we like it in there. I've read some parents remove all toys from their room, but that's clearly not feasible on a daily basis w/ a train table. Beyond that, I want his room to be another enjoyable place for him to to be/play.

    You've given me something to think about with the babygate - perhaps it's worth a shot! Thanks for sharing.

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