3yo DD2 is this way. Has been for about 6 mos. Routine definitely helps. Boundaries help...we tell her we won't come back after saying good night and we stick to it. So, if she gets out of bed and asks for us or for something DH and I talk to her from downstairs in a real sing songy positive tone like "Uh oh, I guess DD2 is going to fall asleep in the hall tonight Daddy" and "Oh wow, I can't believe DD2 is still awake I hope she puts herself back to bed." Sometimes it takes a while but it does work. One time DD2 said back, "Mommy, tell me to go to bed." I did and she did. I laughed because we'd been at a stalemate for 30 mins but she needed it to be on her terms I guess. I also tell her to gets x # of songs, x # of hugs, x #of kisses and I let her pick what x will be. Sometimes it's 5, sometimes it's 10. She doesn't count too high yet so I know it won't be more than 15 and I don't mind investing the time to do 15 hugs and 15 kisses if that's all it will take for her to stay in bed.
The one thing I've drawn the line on is staying until she's asleep. I don't want to get into that habit. So even if she asks me to lay down with her I will lay on the floor next to her and only for 1 song or 1 minute and then leave.
Mom to two amazing DDs ('07 & '09) and a fur baby.
Gluten free since Nov '11 after non-celiac gluten sensitive diagnosis. Have had great improvement or total elimination of: migraines, bloating/distention, heartburn, cystic acne, canker sores, bleeding gums, eczema on elbows, dry skin and scalp, muscle cramps, PMS, hair loss, heart palpitations, fatigue. I'm amazed.