still in car seat and swaddle - should i keep pushing to get out?

[lmh2402]

DD is 7 months, 1 week.

she has been swaddled since forever. but lately she is really squirming out of it.

she's also been sleeping seated - first RNP, then swing, and now in car seat which we put in her crib.

she has never, ever slept flat.

since she's started squirming from the swaddle, i thought she wanted to stop being swaddled.

we've tried unswaddling before - one arm out for first nap of the day, and it's been a fail each time.

i've been obsessing over the fact that she's getting old and really needs to figure out how to sleep flat and unwrapped

so for the last few days i've been trying to cold-turkey her first nap - no swaddle, no car seat - just down in her crib

oh my. it's been absolutely awful. she hasn't slept at all

and then, perhaps b/c she missed the first nap of the day, the rest of the day has been awful too - teeny, tiny naps even though she is swaddled and back in her beloved seat

so...question is, should i back off? or should i push forward and just get her out of the seat / swaddle regardless of how painful it seems?

any advice from anyone who's BTDT would be most appreciated

thx

[KLD313]

Have you tried swaddling but not putting her in the car seat? Maybe it's too much to tackle both at the same time?

[Philly Mom]

I would do car seat no swaddle especially if she sleeps in a car.

[amom526]

I would try to break the carseat habit first. maybe order a wedge for the crib, so she is slightly elevated, and then give it a shot. I think there will be a time wen she will naturally grow out of needing a swaddle, an you shouldn't make yourself crazy over that. Ds1 had his arms swaddled for so long. But one day, close to one year old, he just didn't need it anymore. we knew he was done, because he would wiggle his arm out, but still stay asleep.

I would recommend starting with the second nap of the day if that is an option. That will allow her to get one nap first, so that the entire day is not completely shot. have you ever read any baby whisperer-I feel like this situation might be a good scenario for pick up/put down to try and break the habit.

[lmh2402]

thanks, guys

so the issue is the two things are sort of hand in hand, which is why i was trying to break both at the same time

the pulmonologist has said that DD is not best served to sleep on her back. she was sleeping in the seat due to reflux and due to her laryngomalasia

the pulm says it fine for her to come out of her seat, but to encourage side or tummy sleeping (though obviously is she rolls on her back in sleep, that's fine...but to put her down on her side or on her tummy at least to start)

but i can't do that swaddled

so i tried at first to get out of the swaddle while still in the seat. but she grabs at the seat and screams and yells and tries to pull herself up

we've always only swaddled arms b/c her legs need to be free in order to get the crotch strap up - we buckle around the waist only

ugh

maybe i should just back off and leave her be?

my reasoning for wanting to get her out was/is:
1. i'm concerned that the older she gets, the harder the habit will be to break

2. she has been breaking and squirming out of the swaddle

3. it just really doesn't look comfortable to me

thx

ETA: has anyone used this or something like: http://www.pekemoe.co.nz/index.htm we have tons of sleep sacks from DS, but the issue re: swaddle is he arms not her legs since she hasn't had her legs wrapped since forever. was thinking maybe something like this would be a good transition? or would i just be creating another habit i would have to break

[mikala]

Can she roll to her belly when awake? If so I think I'd try rocking her to sleep un swaddled laying on her side or belly and then do the crib transfer that way. I think I would either focus on the afternoon nap or try it 24/7 on a day or two when you have another adult nearby to trade off and watch DS.

[lmh2402]

Yes, she rolls both ways, though seems better going from back to tummy, which i had thought was supposed to be harder...but she is more apt to seem "stuck"on her belly.

However, when in the crib she seems to freeze no matter how we put her. Even if we put her on her back, which she usually will instantly roll from when playing...when in crib she just stays put and screams. Almost doesn't even move arms...maybe it's too much space? Overwhelming?

[mikala]

Has she spent any happy time just sitting up in her crib with toys? I'm trying to think of things to reduce the panic.

Yeah, I think back to belly is supposed to be harder, or at least it has been for both of my boys.

dS2 is the same age and I stopped swaddling cold turkey and moved him from a bassinet to the crib about a month ago. Sleep was rocky for a few days and I compensated by scheduling a drive during one of the naps hoping for a car nap or sometimes put him to sleep in a carrier to keep everyone sane while he figured it out. Maybe one of those would help whenever you make the move? We were lucky to not have the back sleeping health stuff.

Good luck!!

FWIW I think our infant seat has a warning not to put it on a mattress or other non floor surface. It seems unlikely for something else to happen but....

Good luck!

[lmh2402]

Has she spent any happy time just sitting up in her crib with toys? I'm trying to think of things to reduce the panic.

no, not really. though i had thought of this in the past couple of days too. so i started having her spend a few min in there while we play...but really only started this on sat

FWIW I think our infant seat has a warning not to put it on a mattress or other non floor surface. It seems unlikely for something else to happen but....

i'm sure my seat would have the same warning, but i feel ok doing it. i did it with DS for four/almost five months. but then we just transitioned him out. it was rocky, but i don't remember it being this rocky

anyway, thanks for the advice

i'm so torn. i kind of want to just leave it alone. but i know i need to get her out and sleeping "normally." it's just going to be torture...for us...but also for her and i hate knowing that she's going to be so upset.