Preschooler asking about death - is this normal

[BabbyO]

Stachio is a little older than 3.5 yo and in the last 2 weeks he has started asking about death. Like, "when you and daddy get old are you going to die?" "Why do people die?" "When will you die?"

He's asked these sorts of questions for the last week or two. Then last night when I was doing dishes, he asked, "Mama, why didn't you die today?" Not in a mean way...in a curious way.

Is this normal for his age? I don't know of anyone in the family who's passed recently that he would be aware of (my mom told me about her former boss passing and my Aunt's sister passed recently, but I don't think DH even knows about those, let alone Stachio). I really don't think it was anything that he over heard in the car or house. He may have heard something at the babysitters (she has a son in 1st grade - so maybe Stachio is repeating something he said?)

Anyway...just curious.

[vonfirmath]

Is it possible something dangerous happened -- or even just he wanted to know why he had to hold someone's hand and the response was something to the order of "You might die?"

[Blue Hydrangea]

Normal. DS is 3.5 and asks these kinds of questions as well. It's a part of trying to understanding how the world works. Death is mentioned constantly, on tv, the news, radio clips about celebrity deaths, even some cartoons and fairy tales often have death involved. Curiousity questions are just that- curiousity.

[LMPC]

This is about the age DD started asking about death as well. I think it's totally normal. I always just reassure her that DH and I are not dying any time soon (yes, I realize I could get hit by a bus, but I don't think she's ready for this yet).

[MSWR0319]

I think it's normal. DS is 4.5 and has been talking about it for about a year. Not all the time, but when we drive by a cemetery or when a pet gets old. it first came up here when DS asked about a funeral processional outside the church next to the library last summer.

[Momit]

DS is about a year older than your little guy, and I remember that around that age was when he started asking about death.

[TwinFoxes]

Well, I certainly hope it's normal, because my two talk about it a lot, in a very matter of fact way. "Are you going to die today?" They're not worried about it, just kind of curious. I don't think they've fully grasped the concept...but then sometimes when I tell them they could get hurt very badly, they'll ask, "would I die?" (like being hit by a car because they let go of my hand in a parking lot) so they kind of grasp it.

[Kymberley]

I think it's normal as well. DS, who is also 3.5, has started asking about death, too. Our boxer had to be PTS a year ago, and he recently started asking if the dog was dead and why.

[BabbyO]

Is it possible something dangerous happened -- or even just he wanted to know why he had to hold someone's hand and the response was something to the order of "You might die?"

Not that I'm aware of...he did get a talking too after letting go of my hand and goofing around in a cross walk on an extremely busy road, but I know I said he could get "hurt" not that he could die.

Good to know that it is fairly normal. We've reassured him that we'll be around for a long time, but that death is normal (all living things die when their bodies stop working properly).

I was just surprised because it sort of came out of the blue to me...but perhaps he heard something I didn't catch....

[mmommy]

DD1 started talking about death around 3.25. Then my parent's dog was put to sleep and after that the fish and one of the hermit crabs in her preschool both died. So, at 3.75 she now has a better grasp on what it means, and asks questions about when our dog will die, when I will die, etc. Because of the deaths in the preschool classroom her teachers reached out to the family to let us all know and to let us know that talking and asking about death, even without the death of a classroom pet, at this age is really normal.
So, it sounds to me like your DS is on schedule