nothing. everything.

[lmh2402]

i feel like i'm losing it

i have no one to turn to

i can't discuss this IRL

i can't get onto the stupid infidelity forum b/c i just haven't gotten a response

i can't sleep. i feel like i am drowning

i can't really post on this board - other than this post here - b/c i feel like this is regular life on here and i am in some alternate universe of shame and utter confusion. here feels foreign and happy

i feel like a trapped rat. nothing sounds good. there is no right answer. no good alternative

i feel like i've been in this state of sort of "oh well" nonchalance since the end of last week...yet my whole body is physically shaking all day long. my stomach is queasy. i can barely eat without feeling like i'm going to throw up.

i honestly know nothing anymore. i have absolutely no idea which way is up. what is real. i feel like i'm condemned to a life of endless drowning.

i am not sure i can figure this out. i don't know how to figure anything out and i really need to talk to someone. in real life. someone that can hug me. but there is no one b/c if i tell anyone, than i'm committing to go in one direction and there's no going back.

i can barely be around my kids without literally starting to pluck my hairs out in this weird new tick i seem to have developed...i think i'm going to pick myself bald

i just needed to write something somewhere. i've been sending myself emails all day.

[Kymberley]

I wish I could give you a hug, a shoulder, and an ear. I'm so sorry you are dealing with so much.

[georgiegirl]

Many hugs. I'm so sorry. Please feel free to PM me if you want to "talk." I haven't been thought infidelity, but my best friend has.

[urquie]

I am so, so sorry and sending you you P&PTs and a big cyber hug!

[wencit]

Oh, I am so, so sorry. Sending you P&PTs, mama.

[wellyes]

Oh I'm sorry.
Call your doctor. When I was in a crisis my doc was able to help. You are in crisis.
Can you hire a sitter for a few nights to help, give you some time to take care of yourself?

[BunnyBee]

Please call your doctor! You need to talk to someone, and you might need something short term to get you through and help you sleep/function.

I'm so sorry.

[lmh2402]

Oh I'm sorry.
Call your doctor. When I was in a crisis my doc was able to help. You are in crisis.
Can you hire a sitter for a few nights to help, give you some time to take care of yourself?

my son knows something is wrong and he's scared and so he's extra needy. which is so hard right now b/c all i want is to be left alone. totally alone.

[LMPC]

I totally agree with wellyes...call your doc...you are in crisis! I am so so very sorry! HUGS!!!

[Giantbear]

you need professional help right now, call your dr.