My friends stink

[hellokitty]

I'm sorry -- I feel for you. I think it is hard to make and keep friends when you are an adult. I have a lot of envy when I look around and see folks who have these amazing friendships and I keep wondering where I went wrong?

I've come to realize in the past few yrs, that it's not unusual to outgrow friends. Ppl change and their relationships change along with that. I had some friends I used to be very close to, but as things changed (kids started school, she returned to work, etc.), our friendship changed too. It is hard to keep friends and takes a lot of work from both sides. When you feel like you are always the one doing the work, sometimes it doesn't feel worth it to keep going. I've had several friendships fizzle out and I feel badly about them at first, but yrs later when I think about it, I realize that it was time for both of us to move on. I hope that you can find new friends whose lives are similar to yours right now. I find that to be a key ingredient. The less you have in common, the harder it is to KIT.

[Still-in-Shock]

Then she goes and makes a crazy antisemitic comment that blindsided me. There goes that..

Hate when that happens! In the past, I have found that just letting people know that I am not comfortable with something they said by saying "I really wish you hadn't said that. It hurts my feelings.", or just "I really wish you hadn't said that" is all the wake-up call they need.

[blisstwins]

Hate when that happens! In the past, I have found that just letting people know that I am not comfortable with something they said by saying "I really wish you hadn't said that. It hurts my feelings.", or just "I really wish you hadn't said that" is all the wake-up call they need.

I did not say something and I hate myself for not doing so--I was shocked. I think/hope my expression/body language said what I felt because she elaborated/contextualized, but I can't actually open my heart, under any circumstances, to someone with that kind of belief system.

[bisous]

I did not say something and I hate myself for not doing so--I was shocked. I think/hope my expression/body language said what I felt because she elaborated/contextualized, but I can't actually open my heart, under any circumstances, to someone with that kind of belief system.

This would be me too. I wouldn't be able to come up with a response for shock and then it would be hard for me to be friends with someone who really felt that way!