I don't even recognize my life anymore

[Giantbear]

I also found the adjustment to three to be harder than I expected. Pp gave you great suggestions. Don't feel like you're failing. Trying your best is not failing.
I've also learned to ask for help. There are a number of 7th & 8th grade girls on my block that hang around outside chilling just when I'm putting my kids to bed. These are sweet kids who I know well. I recently started asking whoever is available if they'd like to take DS for a walk. It's like a privileged status to be trusted to watch someone else's kid, & as long as he's strapped into his stroller I'm perfectly comf with it. It can get me anywhere from 20 - 40 mins to just focus on my other kids & bedtime is so much smoother when they have my undivided attention.
I'm learning that I can ask for help & there's no shame or issue. I'm not paying these kids- it's a very casual thing.

The bolded are very wise words. You need help. Whether it is family, paid or volunteer, you need some help and there is no shame in asking for it.

[OKKiddo]

I am going to agree with everything previous posters have said. I'm a mom to three (6, 4, and 1) and I hired a housekeeper to come while I was pregnant. There was no way to keep up with it all. It helped out a whole bunch and not just for me but my husband and sons too. Then after the baby came I had the housekeeper come more frequently and we made sure to take regular date nights. Another big improvement.

We've moved since and I haven't hired a housekeeper but my hubby wants me too, lol. I have hired a nanny who gave her notice a few weeks ago because she finished school and got a job. She was with us for 5 months and was a complete blessing! It was so nice to feel like I was returning to some kind of normal--and she only came two days a week for 3 hours each time.

Give yourself a break, it's hard with three but there IS light at the end of the tunnel and you can plug in a lamp (nanny, housekeeper, etc) in the meantime to get you through. In fact, you've motivated me to call around and find a housekeeper today!

[anonomom]

Thanks, everyone, for your support.

The shameful thing is that we have a cleaning service to come every other week and clean our bottom floor. It takes a few frantic hours the night before they come to clean up, and usually the place is a disaster again within hours (but at least it's clean underneath). One day I will get the top floor sufficiently decluttered to have cleaned, too, but not yet.

DS hates the stroller with a passion -- generally, he hates to be confined in any way. I can't even get him to stay in long enough to walk down to the bus stop in the afternoons. I am trying to spend as much time as possible outside, letting him explore under my watchful eye. That tends to make him happy, at least.

I am looking for a mother's helper for the summer. And I know I shouldn't be whining so much. If I step back and look at my life, I'm pretty darned lucky. I just start forgetting it when I haven't slept.

[teresah00]

I hear your pain. As I frantically clean when #4 is napping #3 creates disasters that take me even longer. The more time we're outside the better. Less time at home means less time to make a mess


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[flashy09]

Thanks, everyone, for your support.

The shameful thing is that we have a cleaning service to come every other week and clean our bottom floor. It takes a few frantic hours the night before they come to clean up, and usually the place is a disaster again within hours (but at least it's clean underneath). One day I will get the top floor sufficiently decluttered to have cleaned, too, but not yet.

DS hates the stroller with a passion -- generally, he hates to be confined in any way. I can't even get him to stay in long enough to walk down to the bus stop in the afternoons. I am trying to spend as much time as possible outside, letting him explore under my watchful eye. That tends to make him happy, at least.

I am looking for a mother's helper for the summer. And I know I shouldn't be whining so much. If I step back and look at my life, I'm pretty darned lucky. I just start forgetting it when I haven't slept.

Your DS sounds just like my baby. She is not the type who sits in a high chair/stroller and wants to be outside seeing new things all the time. I have 3000 toys in the living room and she usually just runs to the baby gate and or grabs my hand and tries to lead me outside...if I don't go, she screams. I CAN NOT imagine have two other kids that needed my attention, let alone a house to clean. And he wants to nurse all the time?? You are not feeling sorry for yourself, cut yourself tons of slack and remember this is not a permanent moment in time. I don't have any real advice, just sympathy!

[Indianamom2]

Heck, I feel like this most days and I only have two and mine are a bit older.

You are in the trenches, especially if you're nursing. All those hormones and lack of sleep (and real help) make you nuts. What you have to do is survive and keep everyone else alive. You don't even have to make everyone happy, just get by until you can get life back to a more manageable state.

I think we've all been there at least once in our lives and it does get better.