I am so ready to throw in the towel

[MamaMolly]

Ohhhhhhhhh I remember those days. And the intense fantasy of running away for a little while. Or getting a not too painful non-disfiguring illness that required a couple of weeks of hospitalization.

I can tell you it WILL get better.

[petesgirl]

I get so annoyed when my DS behaves/sleeps/eats/whatever better for the sitter or grandpa or anyone else! Hello child, I'm your mother-- i do more for you than anyone else and I deserve the respect here!! Sigh.... All I can offer to you is a 'you are not alone.'!

[Still-in-Shock]

Thanks Petesgirl. It's good not to be alone. And thank you Molly.

Rebecca, I actually was looking for some ear plugs when DH went into our little one. He is in day care, so we don't need a sitter in the afternoon. We got her because DH and I both come home exhausted, but we want our son to have a chance to play at home before eating/bathing/sleeping. Having 2 days a week where we don't have to think about what to prepare for a toddler for dinner has really helped, but I still have to figure out why our son wakes in the middle of the night. I do agree that no child is permanently damaged by crying; but I might be!

[JenChem]

I always apologized to DD because her older brother broke my cry response. He was an awful sleeper and a huge cryer. Sometimes in the first few months I felt like he cried all day and I was the worst mother ever. Some day he will sleep but sleep deprivation is the worst.

[Katigre]

Thanks Petesgirl. It's good not to be alone. And thank you Molly.

Rebecca, I actually was looking for some ear plugs when DH went into our little one. He is in day care, so we don't need a sitter in the afternoon. We got her because DH and I both come home exhausted, but we want our son to have a chance to play at home before eating/bathing/sleeping. Having 2 days a week where we don't have to think about what to prepare for a toddler for dinner has really helped, but I still have to figure out why our son wakes in the middle of the night. I do agree that no child is permanently damaged by crying; but I might be!

Is it possible he's waking bc he misses you? My oldest used to wake at night at that age ONLY in nights I had been gone at work and missed his bedtime. He was absolutely looking for me and needing me at night.

I have never regretted the extra cuddling in those nights and the cosleeping we did at that age.

I'd take encourage you to rethink the adversarial paradigm toward your child - that will not serve you well as they go through the next developmental stages.

Sent from my SGH-M919 using Tapatalk

[StantonHyde]

Thanks Petesgirl. It's good not to be alone. And thank you Molly.

Rebecca, I actually was looking for some ear plugs when DH went into our little one. He is in day care, so we don't need a sitter in the afternoon. We got her because DH and I both come home exhausted, but we want our son to have a chance to play at home before eating/bathing/sleeping. Having 2 days a week where we don't have to think about what to prepare for a toddler for dinner has really helped, but I still have to figure out why our son wakes in the middle of the night. I do agree that no child is permanently damaged by crying; but I might be!

Yes, the crying is harder on the mom! With DD we had 2 episodes of crying for 2 hours and that was it. She always cried when you put her down to sleep--it was her way of releasing and relaxing. If she cried more than 15-20 minutes, I would absolutely go get her but that was very rare.

I didn't realize you were WOTH--that makes it so much harder when you don't sleep.

As I said to my then 6 yo son one day, "If anybody is running away, it's me!"

[doberbrat]

I'd be most irritated w/dh if I had a plan in place and he deviated from that. Though I'm sure he probably just intended to be helpful.

That being said, if co-sleeping works for you guys, then go for it. dd1 only sttn ONCE before she turned 2. So we coslept. dd2 sttn at a very early age but I wanted her in our room for a few reasons so when she outgrew her pnp, we just put a crib mattress on the floor next to our bed and she slept there.

Sometimes, you just do what you have to do to make your life work at the time.

and ftr, I'd say most moms have periods of time where they really dont like their kids very much and would love to run away from home. It passes. Its important to have some sort of outlet to work those frustrations out. Long solo walks, exercise, books, baths, even wine if it doesnt happen too often. Personally I like to take the dogs out for a midnight walk when there is NO ONE around and I dont have to listen to anyone talking, romance novels and chocolate. I often crave a wine cooler, but sadly, i havent made it to a liquor store in the last 10mo.

[Still-in-Shock]

Cosleeping is not an option for us; DH sleeps too deeply and rolls, and the baby-now-toddler moves too much.

Katigre, I did wonder if just some reassurance would help, and did that when he woke up last night and stood up in his crib. It was easier to consider that when I wasn't exhausted, and it did seem to help. Of course, trying to put a sleeping 30# toddler in a crib without waking him is a challenge, but I somehow managed it.

[sunnyside]

Is this a new thing? Could he be having a growth spurt and waking hungry? My dd still nursed once a night at that age and once she ate went into a nice sleep until late morning.

[Kestrel]

Try not to feel guilty about your attitude. We've almost all been there.

I allowed myself one "check"; after ten minutes of crying, I would check to make sure that "lovey" hadn't fallen (nothing is as tragic as a dropped lovey) and then try an do something else. Something active helped me. I spent a lot of time cleaning the bathroom & closet across from DS's closed door, or folding laundry in the next room. If the tone of the cry changes, you'll know something's up.

No harm calling for help if you need it. If you can arrange a drop off playdate (Grandma's or friend?) and get a couple hours of solid rest, it will make a world of difference in how you feel. Since we don't have family help close by, we decided on shifts. Mom puts baby down and goes to bed. Dad is in charge until 2am. If he gets to sleep, great - if not, his problem! Then, we switched - Mom on duty at 2am until 7 or so. It let us both get five hours of solid sleep a day, and whatever snatches else we could.

Good luck. Hold on. You'll get through it.