Scary "road rage" incident this a.m.--could use some reassurance and virtual hugs!

[erv917]

This morning, I was stopped at a stop sign waiting to turn from my neighborhood onto a relatively busy street. I must have misjudged the speed/distance of the oncoming car, and I pulled out in front of an oncoming truck. He braked hard and honked at me--obviously not good, but just to make clear that we're not talking about a screeching/skidding/inches away near miss here. I messed up--I get it. I should also add that I was not texting/putting on makeup/turning clear around to hand something to my DD--basically, just made one bad driving decision, and I'm truly lucky and grateful that there weren't bad consequences.

Anyways, when I pulled into the parking lot of my destination (like 100 yards after this incident), an older woman in an SUV turned in after me. She LIT into me about how she couldn't believe how careless I was, she couldn't believe I would do that with my child in the car (she caught me getting the stroller out, fortunately I hadn't taken DD out yet)--basically, that I am a horrible mother and horrible human being. I was pretty much dumbstruck, all I could say was that she was right, I had made a mistake, and I was sorry. I didn't get defensive, even though it would have been easy to. I admitted my mistake, and she still would. not. stop. berating me. I went on about my morning, but now that DD's down for her nap I am sitting here and just feeling so shaken.

20+ years of driving without an accident or so much as a speeding ticket suggests that I'm not actually the horrible menace to society that this woman believes me to be, but I've never been the most confident driver and for some reason I'm just SO thrown by this. Not sure what I'm looking for here, but I guess I could just use a little reassurance that I am not in fact a horrible driver/mother/human being, and that this woman was out of line.

[DietCokeLover]

That's crazy! She was out of line. Shake it off. You made a mistake. Everyone is ok.

[bisous]

OP, I've made lapses in judgment when driving before. Plenty of them. I think most people have. I hate it/feel bad immediately and try to do better. It happens.

You did a good job responding/not responding to this woman who is clearly unreasonable. She's the one who is out of line, for sure.

I think you handled yourself great. I'm sorry you had to meet somebody so aggressive and angry. Anybody would be upset by that!

I want to help validate you so you can go on with your day! Enjoy your time during your DD's nap. You can totally let this go and feel no guilt!

[ccather]

Crap happens. Too bad we can't all be perfect drivers like that woman. My inner snarky b!tch would have become my raging outter snarky b!tch in your shoes. You kept it classy. Way to go you! Shake it off and move on.

[dogmom]

Wait, was she the driver or not? This was someone else?

[ett]

I don't think she was the driver so it's even crazier that she would go off on you like that. You handled it very well. Everyone has probably made mistakes while driving, even the best drivers. I'm sure that lady has made mistakes while driving! She was way out of line.

[erv917]

Dog mom, she was not the driver that I cut off. I'm guessing she was behind him (big truck that I couldn't have seen around), because I believe somewhere her rant included that I "almost caused a 3 car accident." Presumably she also had to stop short--I was making a right so it wouldn't have affected anyone in the other lane of the two lane road.

Thanks, all for you kind words, they're helping me to gain some perspective! And I wish that I could say that the "keeping it classy" was intentional--I think I was actually just speechless, and she wasn't exactly letting me get a word in! Of course, now I have all these snappy comebacks in my mind (a la George Costanza and the "jerk store") that I want to track her down and deliver!

[newnana]

After my first accident, which was completely my fault, I was a basket case. I was 20 something and shaken. I learned a huge lesson from one of the ladies that I hit. She took me over to the side of the road to get out of traffic, said, "honey, it's called an 'accident' not an 'on-purpose.'" Nobody was hurt, thankfully nobody was mad. I was shocked. It very much made an impression on me. We all make mistakes. In this case you got lucky and nothing happened. So did she. If you had pulled out in front of this truck on purpose, that would have been reckless and irresponsible and all those other things. But that wasn't your intent. She had no way of knowing your intent.

Even if she did, she was in the wrong. You handled this with way more grace than she did (or I would have). If we all treated each other with more forgiveness and kindness the world would be a much better place. She's just lucky that it was you that followed to berate rather than some crazy that would have hurt her.

[Percycat]

After my first accident, which was completely my fault, I was a basket case. I was 20 something and shaken. I learned a huge lesson from one of the ladies that I hit. She took me over to the side of the road to get out of traffic, said, "honey, it's called an 'accident' not an 'on-purpose.'" Nobody was hurt, thankfully nobody was mad. I was shocked. It very much made an impression on me. We all make mistakes. In this case you got lucky and nothing happened. So did she. If you had pulled out in front of this truck on purpose, that would have been reckless and irresponsible and all those other things. But that wasn't your intent. She had no way of knowing your intent.

Even if she did, she was in the wrong. You handled this with way more grace than she did (or I would have). If we all treated each other with more forgiveness and kindness the world would be a much better place. She's just lucky that it was you that followed to berate rather than some crazy that would have hurt her.

This post is wonderfully appropriate. Thank you.

[rkold]

Dog mom, she was not the driver that I cut off. I'm guessing she was behind him (big truck that I couldn't have seen around), because I believe somewhere her rant included that I "almost caused a 3 car accident." Presumably she also had to stop short--I was making a right so it wouldn't have affected anyone in the other lane of the two lane road.

Thanks, all for you kind words, they're helping me to gain some perspective! And I wish that I could say that the "keeping it classy" was intentional--I think I was actually just speechless, and she wasn't exactly letting me get a word in! Of course, now I have all these snappy comebacks in my mind (a la George Costanza and the "jerk store") that I want to track her down and deliver!

While pulling out when you did might not have been the best choice you could have made, if this was almost a 3 car accident, then the person ranting at you was also just as much at fault for nearly causing a collision.

What if instead of your car making a turn it was a deer or a pet or a kid that made the truck driver slam on the brakes? This person was obviously driving too close to the truck and I think they are taking out their anger of their own dangerous choice on you.