Kristen
mama to 3 wild and crazy boys - ages 16, 13 and 11
Yes, this. If the top covers your butt/crotch, no problem. I don't like that she thinks I will let her get by with the regular length shirt that's stretched down. Like she can trick me and I don't know the difference between a tunic and a regular t-shirt, LOL!
She has jeggings and skinny jeans, plus two pairs of thick, sized-up leggings that are more acceptable than not, and we keep coming back to this. It's making me crazy.
"Every mother needs a wife." - Amy Poehler, Yes Please
My rule is that your shirt must not go above the top of whatever pants waist band if you put your arms above your head. Dds go to private school and wear uniforms daily, but on free dress day I know Dd1 has worn non tunic style tops with leggings and not been sent home. Dd2 refuses to wear most jeans, but thankfully most of the Cherokee brand jeggings she has have pockets and look like regular jeans.
Last edited by AnnieW625; 11-09-2015 at 01:09 AM.
Annie
WOHM to two wonderful little girls born in April
DD E, 17
DD L, 13,
baby 2, 4-2009 (our Tri-18 baby)
Something about this school policy really sets me off. The phrase reminds me of the crazy two-finger rule to determine women's virginity imposed by some patriarchal societies.
While I am no fan of leggings as pants, and have always been an incredibly conservative dresser myself, the idea of schools having rules about how long *girls'* tops need to be over leggings really irks me. Do they have rules like this for boys - that are about making them less sexy (rather than simply neatly attired)? Neatness and decorum prescriptions are OK, but I find such sexiness-based rules to be a slippery slope. And believe me, I am NOT a fan of leggings as pants, NOT a fan of short skirts, etc. - but I also defend girls' rights to dress without having the lengths of their tops up for scrutiny by school principals and gym teachers. I think there's a way to convey the message about sensible dress without including that other message of "I have the right to dictate what you do with your body" and "your body is a sexual object that offends me unless decorously covered up."
To take it a step further, 5 years down the line, I don't want young women or men to ever think that "she asked for it with the way she dressed" is an even slightly admissible defense.
I know I'll get some flak for this since I'm extrapolating way past the original question (the school policy sparked this line of thought). I guess I just want to caution about the way in which dress messages are sent to tween/teen girls (and the boys observing these rules). Thanks for listening (and I'm ducking now).
for Sandy Hook
As a boy mom, I don't have a proverbial dog in this fight. I just don't understand your outrage. As parents, don't we need to collectively teach girls and boys how to dress appropriately for whatever the situation is? In my case, that may mean you can't UA to family pictures, you must wear what I picked out. Or you can't wear shorts when it is 20 degrees and snowing when you walk a mile to school. If I were a girl mom, I think it would be incumbent upon me to teach appropriate dress as well. To me, it's not about patriarchy. It's about looking a certain way.
I do think that we should teach girls and boys to dress appropriately for school, and for other occasions. I object to schools sexualizing the dress of girls, though - a six year old wearing leggings with a T shirt isn't trying to be sexy. She's trying to be comfortable. Boys are rarely told what they can and cannot wear.
Beyond rules that I think most people would agree are simply about decency (no underwear showing, skirts should be long enough that you can bend over without exposing yourself, no see-through tops), I don't think that public schools should be in the business of policing dress at all unless they require a uniform (whoch I have no issue with - heck, I wish I could wear a uniform to school!) I believe that clothing choices should be left to parents.
Green Tea, mom to three
For the record, the fingertip rule also applies to shorts, which applies to both boys and girls. If a girl or boy is wearing any old shirt, as long as they are wearing pants or long-enough shorts underneath, it is no problem. If a boy was wearing anything like leggings (such as tight athletic/running pants), the same rule would apply. Having volunteered on a regular basis for several years in both middle and high schools, I am grateful for this middle school rule. If you haven't seen it with your own eyes, it might be harder to envision the dubious choices in attire. Both the girls and the boys need the guidance!
Green Tea, mom to three