Here's how to deal with things... turn it off!

[#2ontheway]

My in-laws stalk me on facebook.

I know that their lives are pretty sheltered, and I think they mostly spend time at home and on the computer and I’m guessing that following me on facebook has become one of their favorite pastimes (and, seriously, I’m not that interesting!).

We have lots of problems with them… they live out of state… I think this is how they feel connected to us.

They are soooo challenging. We’ve cut them off in many respects. So this is like them elbowing in.

But it feels so invasive. I’ve really struggled with what to do. I have considered changing how I post things (and really I don’t post that often) to limit what they see, but that feels like overkill, and a lot of work. And nothing I post is that over the top, so it seems unnecessary. But when someone tags me, and they comment… it feels creepy. And they literally comment on everything I post. Everything.

Sometimes really old pictures, etc., like they're just surfing through my history.

The pinnacle recently was me rsvp’ing to an event, a private party that friends posted but as a “public” event, and suddenly it shows up that they are “interested” in the event. And it has nothing to do with them. They're not invited, they don't know these people. Wtf!! Maybe they just don't get how facebook works. but it just bugged me to no end! I honestly felt embarrassed. Like I had to explain to the host, um, no you don't actually need to invite these people to your house.

But, then, I had an epiphany…

I hid them! Not defriended, just turned off notifications. They can be as crazy and intrusive as they want and I don’t have to be witness to it!

WOW! Go me! Weight lifted!!!!!

So, an anti-bitching post. Just fyi. I recommend this approach whole heartedly!!

[ArizonaGirl]

I'm happy that you have discovered a way to distance them from your lives, it seems very healthy.

[StantonHyde]

That post needs a GIANT like button!!!!

[Globetrotter]

Lol 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[Neatfreak]

Oh, this is what I did with my sister!!!

[Dayzy]

I hate that new "interested" feature! I didn't realize it had started and a friend came up as "interested" in a fundraiser for our school that we had already discussed not going to. I clicked on it to see details and then my friends said they got a notification that I was "interested" also!

What you can also do (have had a similar thing) is to restrict them from seeing things. Keep them as friends but block them from seeing what you do.

[Mommaof3]

I hid my FIL a long time ago!

[doberbrat]

What you can also do (have had a similar thing) is to restrict them from seeing things. Keep them as friends but block them from seeing what you do.

Can you explain how to do this? I've refused to friend my mom for this very reason - I really dont need her seeing everything I do. .... which is minimal, but still.....!

[SnuggleBuggles]

I don't think hiding works like that, or at least not how I use it. I hide people I don't want to unfriend but prefer not to see stuff from them in my regular feed. They don't know they are hidden, our friendship looks normal and they can still see my stuff + comment/ like. Maybe I'm misunderstanding your terminology on what hiding is.
I know you can set up groups and set your posts to only be visible to the group's you choose.


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[specialp]

I don't think hiding works like that, or at least not how I use it. I hide people I don't want to unfriend but prefer not to see stuff from them in my regular feed. They don't know they are hidden, our friendship looks normal and they can still see my stuff + comment/ like. Maybe I'm misunderstanding your terminology on what hiding is.
I know you can set up groups and set your posts to only be visible to the group's you choose.




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When I hide someone, it keeps me from seeing their stuff, but they can still see mine (unless, of course, they have also hidden me which I would never know because that is something they do on their end). I do set up groups like acquaintances so that I can post to "friends, not acquaintances" to keep them from seeing. Now in all honesty, I post something like 2x a year so not very much at all, but I still have it set up that way.