cleaning in 2016

[eagle]

hi all! i am a TOTAL SLOB. borderline hoarder. trying to reform. now that my oldest is older and noticing, he has become my motivation. i began in january and i have kept it up. in the one and a half months i have cleaned out the kitchen and the dining room (which we use for all meals and which i use as an office). i have been keeping it up but i wanted to start posting here. its kind of lonely, although podcasts and audiobooks have helped.

i know that i am not the most prolific poster here on baby bargains. but i do love this place and come here pretty much daily scanning the threads and reading. I LOVE this place because it is SOOOOOOO SUPPORTIVE. so i might as well post here about my problems. i am TRYING to change and making a huge effort and i have not backslid with the kitchen and dining room, both heavily used every day.

we have not ever had people over. ds wants playdates. i want to make that happen. i would love to hire babysitters. i would love to hire people to wash windows and mop the kitchen once a week or every other week. i would love to maybe have adults over (not just playdates). maybe. not sure about that. but in my mind it could be nice. so many sad things because the house is a mess. i really want to change. its not happening fast but i knew it wouldnt happen that quickly. ill be going through older messages for ideas, etc. this is a great resource.

thats all. for today.

[mikala]

Woo hoo! It sounds like you're making awesome progress. Decluttering is a work in progress for me but here are a few of my most important lessons learned- probably totally obvious but I had to figure them out on my own. I have learned that it's much much faster and easier to keep things clean when we have less stuff. I've also learned that I have to have a system for incoming stuff or my newly clean spaces only last about 5 seconds and continually annoys me. This translates to installing kid height hooks for coats/backpacks inside the garage door, a set system for incoming mail, etc.

I've also taken to cellphone photos + a note taking program so I can throw away a lot of the random papers floating around our house. Kid gets a birthday invite? Put it on the electronic calendar and attach a cellphone pic.

For decluttering the cheesy kondo idea of thanking an object for working for awhile, teaching you that a style wasn't right for you, etc has been really helpful for me. I found that I was holding onto aot of things just because of who gave them to me, or because they were in good condition, or cost money and thanking them somehow lessens the guilt if getting rid of perfectly fine things.

I've also had to learn that for me just getting clutter out of the house and donating it or giving it away for free is more important than trying to make money reselling it or finding the best possible place to donate it. A local charity thrift store with a drive through had been great for this and our local fb sites are great for giving away things for free or really cheap with porch/curb pickup. I had used Christmas lights we no longer needed but the thrift store wouldn't take. I felt guilty just throwing away something useful so I posted for free and someone happily picked them off my front steps the same day.

I'm also working hard at not buying things "just in case" or because they're a good deal. The end of season clearance winter coat may look perfect but I should only buy it if it will replace my existing coat.

[lizzywednesday]

...
I'm also working hard at not buying things "just in case" or because they're a good deal. The end of season clearance winter coat may look perfect but I should only buy it if it will replace my existing coat.

If I learned nothing from my mother, it's that something is never a "good deal" if you don't use it.

[Liziz]

I agree with mikala about the donating -- I've found that if I keep stuff thinking I'll try to sell it or get it to the perfect spot, I keep it forever. (i.e. - oh, I need to save these old formal dresses for that special prom fundraiser they do in April!) So these days I give anything I can away for free (to friends or neighbors if they have a need for it) and all the rest gets donated to the Goodwill that's closeby, or put out on the porch when one of those donation trucks comes by. Much less stuff!

Good luck!

[Mikey0709]

I think you may be my long lost sister. Honestly I could have wrote your post word for word. And honestly-it sucks.

I'm trying to change. We actually had a first play date last week cause I found the rug. And I have slowly been coming to the point where I know I won't be selling all of it, and have donated bags.

Just want you know your not alone.... Baby steps.

[TwinFoxes]

I think it's awesome that you are doing this, OP and Mikey0709. It will be good for your kids and family. My across the street neighbor constantly declutters by scheduling pickups by charities like amvets or purple heart. They will pick up even a bag of two or stuff. Just a tip.

[DualvansMommy]

Another one chiming here to say great job! I know how hard it is mentally to live with a lot of clutter. I'm coming to this from the other side; grew up with a single mom who was a complete pack rat and a hoarder, it was easy for her to keep stashing stuff away cuz we lived in a 4 large bedroom home for just two of us!!!!! Two bedrooms were totally dedicated as "clutter rooms" i.e. Packed full of old clothes, outgrown clothes, shoes, fur coats, countless books, and just utter lots of random stuff.

It drove me nuts the older I became, and it has affected to me this day. I am ruthless de clutter queen those days, to the point of upsetting DH for donating his 30 coffee random mugs 10 years ago.

You'll be doing your family a great service, as it is nice to have few rooms to be quickly presentable so you can throw a random play date, dinner date or whatever you want. Kudos!


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