Quote Originally Posted by 123LuckyMom View Post
That's sort of how I feel about it, though I would want my son to know what constitutes an appropriate portion, and I would want him to mind his manners and not monopolize the snacks so others don't get enough. My kids know what constitutes a "special treat" type of situation, though, and plane trips and parties are chances to indulge.

Yeah, see this is what I would hope for. I didn't keep junkfood in the house when the kids were younger, but moved to keeping some sometimes (that looks weird, but that's what I do) as I felt they looked forward to going to other people's houses just to eat! Anyway, I also hoped that would help ds feel like it wasnt an all or nothing situation. I have explained to him over and over what portion sizes should be, but it just doesnt work. He does respond to making sure everyone has enough, what manners are, but people around us who hear me remind him of this (or even people who just see him enjoying himself) tend to say don;t worry, I;m glad he's enjoying himself, etc.

I really would just like him to learn about portion sizes (for treats/junkfood, not regular food--not an issue), but he gets angry when I talk to him about this...so I wonder if I need to lay off for now or not.
Oh, I hate it when I'm trying to teach a lesson but get undermined. I know everyone is just trying to be kind and that's a wonderful thing, but I too would want to emphasize manners etc so that would be a conversation that I'd continue having.

I do think that teaching good things to eat and reminding him how he feels after eating will help him. Maybe you don't need to say anything at all about portion sizes with junk, maybe he'll make the determination on his own that it isn't healthy after comparing how he feels after a moderated meal? If you are reasonably certain he already "knows" how much he should eat, maybe let him figure it out on his own? If you have a healthy environment for him most of the time, his overall nutrition won't suffer but he'll learn for himself how he wants to feel. I think if I could do anything again at my own home, I'd wish that my parents had just focused on exceptional tasting good healthy food as a foil to the yummy but crummy junk.