How much should I (or shouldn't I) moderate junk food for a 10 year old

[JustMe]

So, ds is 10 and dd is 13. Ds does not moderate/control his intake of junk food at all when it is around. We have it in the house sometimes and sometimes not. Never a lot. The issue shows up strongly when we are out and about. Like at a party. He will basically eat chips and whatever junk food they have in an enormous amount...pretty much doesn't stop (although will go do other things and come back, if there are things to do). Last night some friends (an adult couple with no kids) treated us to dinner as we took care of their cat while they were away. They ordered a huge bowl of chips as an appetizer and ds took huge handful after huge handful (and had just had some healthy snacks before, so was not hungry). When I reminded him the chips were for everyone he slowed down briefly, but then my friends said not to worry about it and he ate the whole bowl.

If we are out and I buy the kids a treat, he will ask for another treat soon after, even though he knows I am not going to spend money on treat after treat.

I have talked to him about this, although it has not helped. I do moderate to make sure he is not eating before a meal as then he will not eat the meal, but don't know what to do, if anything, beyond that. He does like healthy food and snacks and will eat them readily if he is not stuffed with junkfood. Weight is not an issue. I am more concerned about health and him learning some ability to moderate himself. Is this just normal for a 10 year old boy? Don't flame me, I really don't know.

[nfceagles]

This reminds me of my 10 yo DS. He asks often knowing I'll say no, but he figures he doesn't know for sure unless he asks. Parties are the worst because he feels like he has free reign and I'm less likely to stop him. My 8yo DD is totally different. In our case, I feel like it is related to DSs food allergies. He has several that making eating at social functions or out tricky. I bring his own stuff and I bring plenty, to share and to make sure he has enough/options. And we do sometimes find other things there that he can have. It's like he thinks, "This is my chance! I may never get it again." Similar with soda. I allow him it when at restaurants or parties because there's so much stuff he can't have. It's a dessert to him. My DS is also very skinny and physically active so I'm not worried about weight, but I do worry about the mentality and future habits. I


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[bigsis]

I have no answers; I just wanted to let you know I have one of those too. A couple of times a week, my kids are alone in the house for a couple of hours after school and my DS thinks he's got reign of the junk food. I don't buy any, but my DH goes nuts and buys them. I try to tell him to just get a handful of chips and stop at that, but it's very difficult to regulate.

[JustMe]

Hmmn, good to know it seems to be fairly typical. I guess we will just get through this the best we can and wait until he is older to develop more skills!

[ShanaMama]

My 10 yo daughter is like this as well. She has no food allergies and is extremely picky about healthful foods. "Deciding" what she wants for breakfast or lunch can turn into a 20 minute discussion. (It's not like the choices vary so much from day to day but somehow it's a major decision for her. ) But junk food of any sort has a magnetic pull on her! She is similar to the child mentioned up thread, it's like she'll never have another opportunity to eat it.
I try to make as small of a deal as possible, and ignore as much as I can. I don't want food causing power struggles. Her above dilemma about what to eat is because I make her decide and prepare what she wants if she doesn't want the basic food we are al learning. Several times she has eaten candy to the point of getting sick (party, holiday ). She is finally starting to occasionally say she wants to eat something but doesn't want to stuff herself. I just praise her for listening to her body's cues. And I try not to aggravate, which isn't easy!

[essnce629]

I really don't buy any junk food for the house so there's nothing for me to monitor at home. Snacks at home are things like string cheese, salami, pickles, muffins, trail mix, and plantain chips. So since 95% of the time my kids are eating healthy at home, I don't really step in or moderate what they eat at birthday parties or friends' houses. I just find it easier to not buy junk so I don't ever have to think about it at home. So if my kid ends up eating a ton of chips, 3 juice boxes, pizza, cake, and a bag of candy at a party it's not really a big deal.

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[SnuggleBuggles]

I really don't buy any junk food for the house so there's nothing for me to monitor at home. Snacks at home are things like string cheese, salami, pickles, muffins, trail mix, and plantain chips. So since 95% of the time my kids are eating healthy at home, I don't really step in or moderate what they eat at birthday parties or friends' houses. I just find it easier to not buy junk so I don't ever have to think about it at home. So if my kid ends up eating a ton of chips, 3 juice boxes, pizza, cake, and a bag of candy at a party it's not really a big deal.

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Though we aren't as good as that at home, we're pretty good. So when the kids are out and about, I don't stress or limit.


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[123LuckyMom]

I really don't buy any junk food for the house so there's nothing for me to monitor at home. Snacks at home are things like string cheese, salami, pickles, muffins, trail mix, and plantain chips. So since 95% of the time my kids are eating healthy at home, I don't really step in or moderate what they eat at birthday parties or friends' houses. I just find it easier to not buy junk so I don't ever have to think about it at home. So if my kid ends up eating a ton of chips, 3 juice boxes, pizza, cake, and a bag of candy at a party it's not really a big deal.

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That's sort of how I feel about it, though I would want my son to know what constitutes an appropriate portion, and I would want him to mind his manners and not monopolize the snacks so others don't get enough. My kids know what constitutes a "special treat" type of situation, though, and plane trips and parties are chances to indulge.


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[JustMe]

[QUOTE=123LuckyMom;4199478]That's sort of how I feel about it, though I would want my son to know what constitutes an appropriate portion, and I would want him to mind his manners and not monopolize the snacks so others don't get enough. My kids know what constitutes a "special treat" type of situation, though, and plane trips and parties are chances to indulge.



Yeah, see this is what I would hope for. I didn't keep junkfood in the house when the kids were younger, but moved to keeping some sometimes (that looks weird, but that's what I do) as I felt they looked forward to going to other people's houses just to eat! Anyway, I also hoped that would help ds feel like it wasnt an all or nothing situation. I have explained to him over and over what portion sizes should be, but it just doesnt work. He does respond to making sure everyone has enough, what manners are, but people around us who hear me remind him of this (or even people who just see him enjoying himself) tend to say don;t worry, I;m glad he's enjoying himself, etc.

I really would just like him to learn about portion sizes (for treats/junkfood, not regular food--not an issue), but he gets angry when I talk to him about this...so I wonder if I need to lay off for now or not.

[bisous]

That's sort of how I feel about it, though I would want my son to know what constitutes an appropriate portion, and I would want him to mind his manners and not monopolize the snacks so others don't get enough. My kids know what constitutes a "special treat" type of situation, though, and plane trips and parties are chances to indulge.


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I agree with this.

I'll just mention, *I* was the kid that ate junk food when allowed with abandon! I was also that naturally skinny kid who didn't really have junk food around at home. I grew up eating mostly healthy foods but would go crazy if exposed to candy, etc. What really helped me was watching the natural consequences of overeating and monitoring how I'd feel afterward. It also helped that because I had healthy food at home, I knew what kinds of foods to "come back to" when I realized that I felt better when I ate better foods. Does that make sense?