Boys and Cotillion Class

[essnce629]

I'm from CA and never really heard of such a thing until one friend from high school told me her parents made her do it and she HATED it (her older sister, who was prom queen, etc was really into it though). Her parents were originally from Greenwich CT which is why I'm sure they were so into it.

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[Dcclerk]

Anyone here put there son in a cotillion class? Thoughts?

I think it totally depends on your kid. Lots of kids around here do it (also SoCal). I would say that ours is weighted more heavily toward the dancing, and less to the manners so not a true half and half. Bummer, because I am all about not being the only harpy trying to teach my kids about manners. I do think they remember more of what their cotillion teacher says than I do though.

That said, both my boy and girl liked cotillion. Especially my boy-- but he really likes to dance and the dj would play contemporary music at the end of the class so the kids could dance "normally" as my kids would say.

At the end of the day, I like activities in which my kids are taught social niceties, so that I am not the only one trying. They like dressing up, because it is so different than their usual very casual style. And, I think that especially on the West Coast, kids are not given that many opportunities to be put into more formal settings, so when they get out of college and have to do the business dinners and the like, they are ill-equipped.

My goal is to make it so that my kids don't have to think about what fork/glass/etc. to use so that they can focus on the person they are with no matter what setting they are in. I'm sure others are able to meet that goal without cotillion, but I like the help...

[StantonHyde]

They actually do this in Salt Lake City--the place where you can go ANYWHERE in jeans. (opera, ballet, you name it) My friend's son went with a friend of his and said it was ok. He had more confidence at the junior high dances--he could actually ask a girl to dance without fainting. There is no way my kids would do it. But I can see why it can be helpful.

[AnnieW625]

I'm from CA and did Cotillion!


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It is very much the in thing to do in Southern California (that and debutante balls during the senior year). All four of my female cousins who grew up in Pasadena and were members of NCL had a debutante ball, and had also done cotillion as had their brothers as well. Some were debutante escorts more than once. I grew up in the Sacramento suburbs and neither were popular there. My mom grew up in Oakland and didn't do either. I don't recall if my dad went to cotillion when he grew up in Pasadena in the 50s and 60s. My mil grew up in San Bernardino and didn't go to either; she also didn't want a quincinera.

I do not have boys, but I am not sure if DDs will do cotillion. I can see DD2 enjoying it way more than DD1 though.

[Corie]

I think it totally depends on your kid.

Yes, I agree. My son wouldn't have any interest and my husband would probably wonder why
I wanted to sign him up.

[94bruin]

Must not be a Californian thing

Dd1 will be doing cotillion this year (we're in the Bay Area.) I grew up in Maryland and never had cotillion offered at my school.

According to parents with older kids at our school, girls definitely outnumber boys at our school.

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[bisous]

I did it in CA too. My practical experience seems really similar to Georgiegirl, except the lady who taught was not mean and I really liked going! I really enjoyed the dancing part of it. It also helped that the boy I had a major crush on was in the class and all of my best friends were doing it too.

I think my boys need every bit of manners help they can get, but I'm not sure Cotillion is something on our radar right now. There were about equal numbers of boys and girls in my program, but again, this was years ago!

[MelissaTC]

Very popular around here. Most people we know do it. M wanted no part of it so I didn't force it.

[anonomom]

I kind of love the idea -- lots of the older kids in our neighborhood did it in 5th and 6th grades. Honestly, I'd sign my kids up in a hot second if the wardrobe wasn't an issue. I love the idea of them learning manners and (for lack of a better term) social graces. But I gather that the girls need multiple white dresses, and finding them for DD1 would be a challenge (she's in a not-common size and it's hard enough to keep her in everyday clothes).