I agree that I would not bring him. However, depending upon his ability to articulate his needs to you, I would talk to him sometime before the meeting to see if he has any input regarding what is the most helpful for him, what is not helpful for him, what helps him work/learn better, etc. I have always done this with dd and now at 14, when she does attend the meetings, the IEP team is very impressed with how well she articulates her needs. Also, she is more effective at getting people to think her needs are valid than I am (not because she does anything special, but just because she is the person being discussed as opposed to the mother of the person being discussed).
lucky single mom to 20 yr old dd and 17 yr old ds through 2 very different adoption routes