Been a While Since We Had Some Whine to Go With the Cheese ...

[TwinFoxes]

It's so interesting reading this, I realize we may be similar sizes. Our bra sizes are similar, I wear 9.5 shoes (and never saw a pair I thought looked dorky because they were 9.5s) and I think you're tall like me. Either you're selling yourself way short, I look horrible and no one has bothered to tell me. I'm going to go with the former.

[Gracemom]

I've found more options at Avenue than Lane Bryant that work for me. They also have coupons so that should please your DH. Sorry he's being so difficult. I've asked my DH to only give an opinion on my clothing if I ask.

[petesgirl]

Well, we set the time aside yesterday, that's really what prompted this b!tchfest.

Taking DD is not an option. Taking DH at least means we have another adult to deal with her.

He has no idea what Plus sized women's clothing costs. None. Every time I tell him what I need and how much it'll cost, he balks.

So, yeah, it's not an option.

I think I'm going to stay home this year if he's so embarrassed by me.

My DH totally does not understand clothing costs for women! If I spend more than $10 on any one item his jaw drops. But, he doesn't actually say anything so I keep buying what I like. I don't buy clothes very often so I feel like if something is expensive I will get my money's worth from it.

[mikala]

It's so interesting reading this, I realize we may be similar sizes. Our bra sizes are similar, I wear 9.5 shoes (and never saw a pair I thought looked dorky because they were 9.5s) and I think you're tall like me. Either you're selling yourself way short, I look horrible and no one has bothered to tell me. I'm going to go with the former.

Your posts always make me smile. And I'm certain it's the former!!

[lizzywednesday]

If you keep your money separate then why is he involved at all? ...

I have no income and he does, therefore he's involved. It worked much better when I was working; I really miss my salary.

[lizzywednesday]

It's so interesting reading this, I realize we may be similar sizes. Our bra sizes are similar, I wear 9.5 shoes (and never saw a pair I thought looked dorky because they were 9.5s) and I think you're tall like me. Either you're selling yourself way short, I look horrible and no one has bothered to tell me. I'm going to go with the former.

I'm just having a good wallow in self-pity and a lot of body-image issues right now. I'm sure you're fine.

And every time DH makes a comment about something being "not flattering," or the comment he made several years ago that "other people" in his family had made comments about how I was dressed/dressing, I get hyper-critical and frustrated all over again.

[lizzywednesday]

My DH totally does not understand clothing costs for women! If I spend more than $10 on any one item his jaw drops. But, he doesn't actually say anything so I keep buying what I like. I don't buy clothes very often so I feel like if something is expensive I will get my money's worth from it.

The bolded bit is exactly how I feel about my DH's idea of clothing costs.

It's not like I'm asking to buy designer duds or anything, but something that fits and doesn't make me feel like I look like a beached whale would be nice.

And the appropriate undergarments required to actually, you know, WEAR the stupid stuff we buy.

[specialp]

The bolded bit is exactly how I feel about my DH's idea of clothing costs.

It's not like I'm asking to buy designer duds or anything, but something that fits and doesn't make me feel like I look like a beached whale would be nice.

And the appropriate undergarments required to actually, you know, WEAR the stupid stuff we buy.

But if he is there with you shopping and even ordering things to be picked up and buying a few shirts and shoes, doesn't he see the cost of the items? It's hard to have blinders on when you're there in person. Have you actually found items you liked, made you feel good, and he refused to give money for them because of the cost? If so, that's so sad.

[khm]

I'm just having a good wallow in self-pity and a lot of body-image issues right now. I'm sure you're fine.

And every time DH makes a comment about something being "not flattering," or the comment he made several years ago that "other people" in his family had made comments about how I was dressed/dressing, I get hyper-critical and frustrated all over again.

I call BS on "other people". Jerks always have non-existant "other people" to bolster their lame argument when they bash others.

I'm sorry. He's being a full-on jerk. Why are you putting up with that? He is not treating you with an ounce of respect, wouldn't you go all mama bear if someone was treating your daughter like this?

He wants you to shop and get "flattering" stuff, but also wants to "give" you none of "his" money? If a friend of yours were telling you all this, what would you be saying to HER? I have a feeling you wouldn't be making excuses for him.

There are plenty of options out there. It might not be exactly what you envision, it might break some preconceived rule you have about clothing yourself, but wipe that slate CLEAN and go with an OPEN MIND, drop the rules you have and sincerely look. (Oh, and do NOT take him along!!)

You are TALL, right? Use that to your advantage. Look at images of other women in your size, there are sites/blogs/stores a plenty online for fashion at every size, height, style, season whatever.

[gymnbomb]

I have no income and he does, therefore he's involved. It worked much better when I was working; I really miss my salary.

This doesn’t sound like keeping money separate then. It sounds like he is the only one with money and he isn’t providing for your basic needs (I.e. undergarments that fit well).


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk