For a two hour play date, if the mom was due back within an hour, I wouldn’t call unless the kid was injured or sick. I would probably mention it to the mom at pick up though. Second or third graders tend to have lots of little drama that blow over quickly. I would be more apt to call if it were preschoolers.
Last edited by westwoodmom04; 01-13-2019 at 10:06 AM.
I wouldn’t say anything, and I wouldn’t decline playdates in future. It sounds like it was not a great mix of kids, and that can happen. Also, there can just be a bad day. Just because a not-so-great time happened once doesn’t mean it will happen again. If your child wants to go there again, I wouldn’t say no. It could be an entirely different experience next time. I would, though, say when you drop your child off that you would like to be called if your child wants to call you. This adult doesn’t sound great, but as long as she’s willing to contact you when asked, it should be fine.
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I very much agree with this. Maybe everyone in general had a bad day. Also maybe the host parent didn’t want to call you and burden you with the issue. If the no call did bother you then yes I would tell the host next time to call if there are any issues.
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Annie
WOHM to two wonderful little girls born in April
DD E, 17
DD L, 13,
baby 2, 4-2009 (our Tri-18 baby)
by this point in the year, most 2nd graders here are 8 or nearly so close supervision is not necessary IMO. But if a kid asks for a parent to be called, I dont know how it can be justified Not to call - unless you know the parent is busy and cant take the all in which case, you'd just say to the kid, Mom cant be reached right now but there's x amt of time till she gets here.
I think I'd decline playdates for a while at that house. Maybe it was a bad day/mix but not being called would REALLY bug me. I might go so far as to leave my phone w/dc and let them call me directly at home if it comes up again. But I've NEVER had my kids call to come home so its a little shocking to me.
dd1 10/05
dd2 11/09
and ... a mini poodle!
I wouldn't say anything, but it would bother me that DD was in tears and the parent wouldn't call. I can understand not calling because it is disruptive. I would be more direct the next time I dropped DD off there - but probably would not encourage future play dates. Supervision in 2nd grade, beyond being there and available, would not be necessary for me. I am not sure what you would say and what it would accomplish.
There are few cases where I have talked with a parent that I wasn't super close with about non-health based play date issues. We had a few play dates with mixes of kids who were not compatible, or where the kid was really poorly behaved, I just didn't invite those kids back. Thankfully DD and I usually agreed on those kids.
I wouldn’t say anything. I think that the best way to handle it is to avoid future play dates in that home. If say something, DC will likely be excluded from play dates in the future. You don’t want to be that mom. DC isn’t hurt, so I’d let it go.
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Stephanie
Mommy to two little girls,
April 2008
June 2012
and a baby boy
Oct 2018
What do you want to come out of it? I wouldn't drop off there again, so that's a moot point.
In general, even when you know you're right, telling other parents that they made a bad decision generally doesn't go well. Personally, I don't really like to take on that one. Easier to steer clear. I mean, even if they are polite about your concerns, are you going to drop your kid off there again? There isn't much good that can come out of this.