Update: Wwyd?
UPDATE:
Just spoke with the principal. I told him the events as I understood them. He let me know that the coach came in to his office yesterday to inform him of what had happened. He told the principal that after the loss the night before, the girls were working on drills in class and were being lethargic and not really focused and he lost his temper. He shared with the principal the story - girl crying, his apology, etc. Coach apologized to the principal and acknowledged that how he behaved was inappropriate. The principal and the coach discussed that he needs to be sensitive to this being 13 year old girls (he had previously been a varsity boys bball coach in another state) and that he has to watch his tone and his volume when speaking with them. (He is very tall and has a deep, loud voice). The principal assured me he is aware and that he feels satisfied with the coach's response. He also said he would make sure to go by the gym during this class times to just lay eyes in there and monitor. There is another coach in there as well so it is not just him with the girls. He did not say this, but I had the sense I was not the first parent he had talked to.
I am satisfied at this point with this response. We'll be monitoring as well, but the season ends in about two weeks so we are almost done. DD will continue to have him for the basketball class for the rest of the year though.
Thank you for all of your feedback. I never thought anything horrible needed to happen to the coach, but I did want there to be someone else to have some accountability/ monitoring of the situation. I am looking at this as another opportunity to talk with DD - AND - DS about what type of behavior is acceptable and what is ok and what is not ok to be tolerated.
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DD (13) came home today telling me about her basketball coach seriously losing his temper today at school at the team. They lost last night pretty significantly - dd was not at the game as she was sick yesterday. He came into practice very angry, telling them they were awful and randomly yelling. He picked up a basketball and heaved it at the wall, almost knocking off one of the banners. He then told them to go get water. One of the girls was having a “panic attack” (per dd. Asked her what this meant to her and she said crying and having a hard time breathing.). He later apologized to the girls and asked them to pray with and for him for his anger issues (we go to a Christian private school).
DD says she was not scared but she does not express fear very often. I also texted with another mom to see if her daughter had a similar story, which she did. The detail she provided was that a female coach was there and laughed when he threw the ball.
DD has repeatedly said that this coach doesn’t like most of the team, has told them before that they are going to lose and yells at them. She also states that she likes him though.
My biggest issue is she has said she is “getting used to it” meaning the behavior. I don’t want my 13 year old daughter to ever be used to a man yelling at her or acting in an aggressive/ out of control manner. However, I am ok with a passionate coach who gets louder in his coaching to motivate the team.
Would you go to the principal? I understand people make mistakes and we all regret our behavior sometimes. I really appreciate his apology and humility to ask for prayer and forgiveness. However, there is so much not ok with this scenario.
WWYD?
Last edited by DietCokeLover; 01-29-2020 at 01:55 PM.
Reason: update
SAHM to Pete and Repeat my "Irish Twins" - DD 12/06 and DS 11/07
Never argue with an idiot. He'll bring you down to his level, then beat you with experience.