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  1. #16
    gymnbomb is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
    Join Date
    Apr 2013


    Quote Originally Posted by petesgirl View Post
    I totally understand why it may be necessary in some circumstances. But, we have a family member who is a child sexual predator and some members of the family refuse to acknowledge that and still think it's ok for him to be around kids. We have worked very hard to teach DS that if adult ever tells them something/does something and asks them to keep it a secret, that's a res flag. Even our pediatrician has discussed this with DS. Yet, here is another adult who repeatedly told DS that he doesn't have to tell his parents anything that happens in their meeting if he doesn't want to? I'm just a little surprised at that.
    I can see why you would have strong feelings about this due to having a family member like this. However, I think there is a big difference between telling a child they need to keep something secret vs. assuring a child the adult will not share the child's confidences with his parents (i.e. the therapist is not telling the child to keep a secret or limiting in any way what the child is allowed/supposed to tell the parents).

    Edit: After reading later posts I see a mention of telling the child they don't have to tell the parent. That could be more confusing. But again, I still see it as the child being in control and making the decision about what to share with which people. So not something I have a problem with. Though maybe just not a good fit if the way they present that option is too strong or not clearly labeled as an option.
    Last edited by gymnbomb; 08-23-2019 at 02:00 PM.
    DS 2/14
    DD 8/17

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