WOHM: Stepping back to PT job with older DC?

[smiles33]

Not sure if it's an option and/or solves your "problem" - but would you be willing to work more hours if you had a more flexible schedule/is that a possibility? I now WFH (with a fair amount of travel, but I can control timing of most of it). Agreement with my manager is that I will get my job done, but not always between 8 - 5. Helps that I'm relatively senior and work in a 24/7 company - but works great for me with our high schooler. I don't feel frustrated that I'm working on my days/time off, I don't give up the income and benefits, but I'm able to attend almost everything I'd like to attend.

Good luck in your decision!

The hard part is that much of my job involves face time interacting with students and colleagues. For students, I've offered the option of phone appts. but only my alumni take me up on that (and only because they're all over the country and not here). So I think trying to reduce to .75 FTE will make my commute better, enable me to drive my kids, and still work a great job.

The only thing I would add is you may want to be able to have the option to increase hours once your kids are in college. I work 36 now and will go up to 40 + OT for college. Most of my colleagues do.

I think that may still be an option. I'm grateful that I've built up a lot of goodwill so I think they'd be amenable to that.

Thanks again all. Sorry for the lengthy delay. I was knocked out with the flu and just miserable the past few days.

[squimp]

I worked part time for 10 years and I loved it. My job is similar to a faculty position, and I was still able to get promoted and have a lot of responsibility and leadership during that time. Basically, when I worked part time I think I was more efficient and there was not a big difference in my output or productivity, I just wasted less time. I also gave myself license to miss superfluous meetings and just be really protective of my time.

High schoolers do require a different type of care and feeding, and wanting to be there. We're now in the "counting down the years" phase. Recently I am stepping back a little bit in terms of travel and working <40+ hours because of my high schooler. I want to be able enjoy her activities and friends and just be there for her. She is my only and by heck I will really miss her when she goes to college. I am happy with this decision and my work is not suffering.

My commute is 7 minutes, so I can't imagine that long commute, that is a whole different way of life! I would be all about making that easier.

I haven't read the whole thread, but make sure you understand the implications for retirement. My ending salary will affect some of my benefits and pension-type stuff, and working part time at the end of your career might mean you have a different baseline.

[niccig]

The only thing I would add is you may want to be able to have the option to increase hours once your kids are in college. I work 36 now and will go up to 40 + OT for college. Most of my colleagues do.

Yes you may want to increase once kids are in college. I have the option to work 1 month in summer school and I don’t do it now. I may do that when DS is in college as it’s an extra month pay and my salary will be higher which does effect my pension.


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[american_mama]

I have had a very different work history than you, but I worked part-time (20 hours) for 4 years, went up to full time for an academic year (9 months) and just dropped back down to 20 hours in June. I also have an 11, 15 and 17 year old.
The added hours were in my same department, but in a different area and with a different supervisor. I dropped those extra hours because the new stuff and supervisor were going terribly. I was so happy to go back to just the job and supervisor that were good.

The one year I worked full-time was really hard to juggle, perhaps because I was slow getting used to it. I had so many doctor, orthodontist, and dentist appointments for 4 people, plus a son at a new school that was a one hour drive to his orthodontist, that I didn't work a full-time week for over 6 weeks when I first started. I also volunteer a lot for a particular organization, and that was really hard to do while working full-time.

I am much happier working part-time, but it's 90% of it is for better work-family balance, not bonding with my kids.

I don't live in a long commute area and my high schoolers' after school activities are all on-site or easily accessible for school bus... but then the pickup routine starts with different kids, different times, different places. Sometimes DH and I split it up, sometimes it fell more on me, and I spent about 2 hours a night chauffeuring kids who spent most of the time in the car on their phones, sometimes with ear buds in. It wasn't much bonding time. We are not an early dining family anyway, but it was rare that everyone was in the house together to eat, and often hard to find time to even make the meal. It is easier this year due to some changes in DD2's schedule and the fact that I am not working full-time. But I don't think my bonding with my kids is easier this year compared to last.

On the other hand, my oldest is a 12th grader, which means college visits and applications have taken a lot of our time together this fall. I'm really glad I've had that time. She has some very specific desires in a college, most of which necessitate her looking out-of-state, but she is also uncertain and procrastinating, so I have been very involved in college applications. Maybe a kid with a different personality or less unique educational goals would not need as much time.

Since about November, every month I really feel how much closer and closer DD1 is to leaving for college. I don't feel exactly sad about that, more that I'm aware of the big change coming to our family. We just bought a 5 bike rack a few months ago... why? She's almost gone. DD1 mentioned her ENglish teacher today, and I don't know a thing about her, but then thought, why bother. DD1 has almost graduated. Things like that.

Also with college comes finances. I may have to work full-time for us to afford college, not just for DD1, but for all the kids. Sounds like you are in a much better position about that, but still, consider it very carefully. myintuition.org is a very easy website that gives you likely family contributions for about 30 different colleges. You might want to try it and compare it to the Tuition Grant benefit you have, and see how your finances look. The financial aid director at one of those college recommended the website.

One other thing that might tilt the balance about working part-time..... what is likely going on with your parents' and in-law's health in the next several years? Are you likely to be in a caregiving position for any of those parents? If so, working part-time is easier. I live one hour from my parents and had to do a lot of unexpected caregiving with overnights and days off in September after some simple surgery for my dad didn't go well, then again starting right before Christmas when my mom broke her hip. That was unexpected based on their health history, but not unexpected based on their age. I have two friends with teens who have spent a lot of time this fall driving out of state for mothers with health issues, in both cases leading them to move their mothers into care situations locally.... which involved all the packing, finding a place, moving, etc. So that is another family factor to consider.