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  1. #1
    SAHMIL is offline Silver level (200+ posts)
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    Default Dinner struggles in adolescence?!

    Almost teenager complains about having spaghetti for dinner again for the first time in a couple months . Almost teenager then states we eat too much pasta . ( I have it once a week for a couple of days ) and that we need to eat good food . I told almost teenager he is in charge of cooking a meal this weekend either Sunday or Monday . I told him he needs to tell me what the menu is so I can get ingredients and he says no it’s a surprise . Should I pull the same crap on him and give him a hard time or say it’s good or tell him how I really feel ?

    Good food in his mind is burgers and pizza so far . I’ll get the rest .


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  2. #2
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    Default Dinner struggles in adolescence?!

    Yes, have him cook. He will need help to start. My DD (13) and her friend (12) have been cooking nice meals for about a year. On Saturday they made chicken tacos with beans and corn on the side. They research recipes online and make a list of what they need. The cook for other kids in the neighborhood. It’s a great skill and cuts down on complaining. (Other recent things they’ve made include chicken pad Thai, Cajun chicken with roasted potatoes and Brussels sprouts, French onion soup, and French toast (it was on a snow day.)
    DD (3/06)
    DS1 (7/09)
    DS2 (8/13)

  3. #3
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    I'm sorry you are dealing with this but it sounds like you are on a good track to make it better.

    I think it's awesome you are having him cook. As for how you should react, I guess you might want to ask yourself the point of his cooking. If you want to show him how it feels to have your feelings hurt, that is a way to go. If you are trying to get him excited about food and wanting to cook more, then that is another. If it isn't good but he truly tried, you could always praise his effort then have a conversation about how hard it is to actually cook healthy dinners let alone come up with a menu plan that everyone is happy with.

    BTW, I have been making DC cook for years because of the same attitudes. They are good at chopping things and making easy things like tacos. Sometimes they need help with more complicated things but that's because they like the fact that if they help cook, they don't have to clean afterwards and sometimes I make crazy things.

    As an aside, one of my friends got her husband to start cooking at the age of 46 after she got fed up one night about his complaining. She asked me the same question about how to react to his meal and I said she should be super happy with his dinner. As in, their love life had fizzled but I said she should consider rewarding him for such an awesome meal. It totally worked! She said it was more ...work for her but he cooks about once a week and is happy to do it, even without the ...reward afterward.

  4. #4
    Percycat is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Great job having your son prepare a meal this weekend and setting him up for success by making sure you have the necessary ingredients.

    As tempting as it might be to be picky and complain as payback for the lack of appreciation you receive, I think it would be better for you to model the behavior you would like from your children. Be thankful, appreciative, and complementary. Also, have low expectations. If he's not used to making a meal, he will probably take longer, make a bigger kitchen mess, and require some assistance. He's gotta learn sometime. : )

  5. #5
    niccig is online now Clean Sweep forum moderator
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    If you don’t like what I cook, you can go make a PB&J or something else. You do not complain though, as that’s rude to me who spent time preparing the meal. You just say you didn’t like it and can you get yourself something else. Not everyone likes all types of food. DS didn’t like the stir fry tonight, he ate the tofu and picked out the vegetables he liked. Then he heated up leftover hot wings.


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  6. #6
    Kestrel is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    I would love an update! What did he make, how did it turn out?

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