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  1. #11
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    I agree with you, OP, but I’m not sure I’d say anything. Maybe once. The main point is- and has been raised already- is that clock resets when you go to the store, gas station...basically whenever you encounter new people. So, unless they really all did nothing for the last 2 weeks, the gathering isn’t as safe as they think.


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  2. #12
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    I would acknowledge how difficult it is and that the danger is when anyone goes in public they are subject to being exposed and that you are contagious without exhibiting symptoms. However, knowing that anything could cause them health issues, allow for some grace in that they want to see their grandchildren.


    DD1 MiniMoo 11/10
    DD2 MiniMoo2 9/13

    “I have certain rules I live by. My first rule I don't believe anything the government tells me. and I don't take very seriously the media, or the press, in this country." - George Carlin

  3. #13
    gatorsmom is offline Pink Diamond level (15,000+ posts)
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    My parents are dead but my ILs are in their 70’s and cherry-picking how they want to abide by the rules too. I told DH to remind them that if they get this disease and it hits them hard, it will be excruciating. As someone with asthma, not being able to breathe is agony. Some aches and pains and a fever are uncomfortable and annoying but no one is really talking about how it feels to be that short of breath. Counting each breath you painfully try to draw in is a horrible nightmare. I can’t imagine spending weeks like that because your community doesn’t have enough ventilators. I’m hoping that maybe the fear of that kind of pain, will scare them back into their house.

    OP, I’d let your parents know how horrible this could be for them. Do either of your parents want to watch helplessly while the other is suffering and dying? Maybe if you scare some sense into them, they will decline offers to help your brother’s family.
    Last edited by gatorsmom; 03-30-2020 at 10:38 AM.
    " I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent." Mahatma Gandhi

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  4. #14
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    wendibird22 is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    Correct social distancing means only face to face with those in your home. Period. If you go to the store you are exposing the other household to what you’ve exposed yourself to. If both households have one person leave for the store then your expose is two fold. Unless both households are not leaving the house and not receiving deliveries of food, then it’s fine. But I doubt most households are this strict.


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  5. #15
    almostmom is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    I totally get why you're annoyed. But if none of them are venturing out of the house for work or socially, and they were strict about those practices for 2 weeks, my opinion is that I think it is probably ok. I think this is really tricky, and people have different opinions.

    We are being really good about social distancing. I do go to the store weekly, but we are in the burbs, aisles are big, stores are not crowded, I wash when I get home - it feels fine. But that's me. Kids have not seen friends except my son went on a hike with friends and they kept a distance. We had friends over in our backyard this weekend - we kept good distance, but could talk and enjoy our own beveridges. I think this was fine, but not a daily occurrence.

    Our challenge is that last week my sister, with disabilities, had to come live with us. She had been to work at Walgreens 3 days before. I'd like her to move on to live with my parents after 2 weeks, as we are working from home, and it's more challenging for us to have her than them. My dad is 82, my mom 76. They are totally isolating, and scared. And so while I don't see why it wouldn't be ok for her to be with them, my older sister, who is in Paris and terrified that my parents will get sick and die, thinks my sister should live with us indefinitely. I feel very defensive when she acts like we don't get the risk. We are getting the same message from my sister-in-law in Oakland, that they somehow think we're not being careful. And we are being VERY careful!

    I would love to hear the stats on people who are staying home, self-isolating, but carefully going to the store when necessary or walking the neighborhood - is there evidence of that group getting sick? I really want to know.

    But even asking these questions can make people mad, make it seem like I'm cavalier. It's a tricky situation. And while I would absolutely not have my parents or mother-in-law (who is alone in Maine and doesn't want to see ANYONE and won't go to the store) actively in my life right now, with 2 weeks past, if they are super careful, I guess it could be ok.
    Liz

    DS 11/03
    DD 12/05

  6. #16
    niccig is offline Clean Sweep forum moderator
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    Quote Originally Posted by almostmom View Post

    . I feel very defensive when she acts like we don't get the risk. We are getting the same message from my sister-in-law in Oakland, that they somehow think we're not being careful. And we are being VERY careful!
    I was annoyed at my sister lecturing me on staying home and being safe. Where did I go? To the hospital to work my weekend shift. My full-time job in schools is not essential services, so I’m working from home during the week. But my hospital job is essential services. I’m not working with Covid-19 patients, but people are still getting sick and injured for other reasons and need care. Then she started to tell me how to be careful, thanks for the non-expert advice from someone who works in an office and has no idea about hospital contact protocols.

    I know she cares, and I’m sure that’s what the position everyone is coming from, but you have to tread carefully. You can only control you and what your immediate family is doing.





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  7. #17
    mnj77 is offline Silver level (200+ posts)
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    Yes, this would bother me but there's probably nothing you can do to control it. I'm really struggling with not being able to control others too. It just maddens me to see people thinking the rules don't apply to them, or violating the spirit of the rules. I feel like people are really not capable of understanding the exponential nature of how this spreads. Or maybe they're just selfish.

    The point of social distancing is to limit your contacts with others as much as possible. If you MUST be around others (to go work or the grocery store, is basically the extent of it), then stay at least 6 feet away. A non-essential social gathering is not ok just because you stay six feet away - if you are in extended contact with others, even six feet away, you're endangering everyone. Backyard gatherings - not essential. Walks with friends - not essential. If you're not sure if it's ok, then don't do it.
    DD 2007

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by mnj77 View Post
    The point of social distancing is to limit your contacts with others as much as possible. If you MUST be around others (to go work or the grocery store, is basically the extent of it), then stay at least 6 feet away. A non-essential social gathering is not ok just because you stay six feet away - if you are in extended contact with others, even six feet away, you're endangering everyone. Backyard gatherings - not essential. Walks with friends - not essential. If you're not sure if it's ok, then don't do it.
    The recommendations are confusing! Everyone has their own definition of "social distancing". We are being very strict here. I've only gone grocery shopping and walks in the neighborhood. I've seen people chatting outside, while keeping their distance (though some don't seem to be quite 6 ft.)
    Mommy to 2 DS's (2003 and 2007)

  9. #19
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    I’d love to do some “social distancing” hangouts with my neighbors but they aren’t really safe. We’re trying hard here to follow the guidelines so I guess we’ll hold off on these.

    https://www.tampabay.com/news/health...-6-feet-apart/

    “Dr. Maria Ciminelli, the president of the New Jersey Academy of Family Physicians and director of the CentraState Family Medicine Residency Program, said guidelines for people to remain six feet apart are meant only for those essential trips outside the home. Any extended, unnecessary contact with people, even six feet apart, violates the spirit of the precautions.

    “If you’re going to practice intense social distancing, it really means avoiding or limiting contact with people outside of your family, and really staying home most of the time, unless you really need to go out,” Ciminelli said. “But any prolonged kind of engagement outside is really still not social distancing, having that prolonged contact with people that are not in your family."
    https://www.nj.com/coronavirus/2020/...pert-says.html




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  10. #20
    MMMommy is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by wendibird22 View Post
    Correct social distancing means only face to face with those in your home. Period. If you go to the store you are exposing the other household to what you’ve exposed yourself to. If both households have one person leave for the store then your expose is two fold. Unless both households are not leaving the house and not receiving deliveries of food, then it’s fine. But I doubt most households are this strict.


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    Quote Originally Posted by mnj77 View Post
    Yes, this would bother me but there's probably nothing you can do to control it. I'm really struggling with not being able to control others too. It just maddens me to see people thinking the rules don't apply to them, or violating the spirit of the rules. I feel like people are really not capable of understanding the exponential nature of how this spreads. Or maybe they're just selfish.

    The point of social distancing is to limit your contacts with others as much as possible. If you MUST be around others (to go work or the grocery store, is basically the extent of it), then stay at least 6 feet away. A non-essential social gathering is not ok just because you stay six feet away - if you are in extended contact with others, even six feet away, you're endangering everyone. Backyard gatherings - not essential. Walks with friends - not essential. If you're not sure if it's ok, then don't do it.
    Quote Originally Posted by SnuggleBuggles View Post
    I’d love to do some “social distancing” hangouts with my neighbors but they aren’t really safe. We’re trying hard here to follow the guidelines so I guess we’ll hold off on these.

    https://www.tampabay.com/news/health...-6-feet-apart/

    “Dr. Maria Ciminelli, the president of the New Jersey Academy of Family Physicians and director of the CentraState Family Medicine Residency Program, said guidelines for people to remain six feet apart are meant only for those essential trips outside the home. Any extended, unnecessary contact with people, even six feet apart, violates the spirit of the precautions.

    “If you’re going to practice intense social distancing, it really means avoiding or limiting contact with people outside of your family, and really staying home most of the time, unless you really need to go out,” Ciminelli said. “But any prolonged kind of engagement outside is really still not social distancing, having that prolonged contact with people that are not in your family."
    https://www.nj.com/coronavirus/2020/...pert-says.html




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