How to help DS with homeschooling

[basil]

DS is in 2nd grade, an extrovert, and definitely the hardest hit by the social distancing of us all.

Things are stressful in my house right now. DH is staffing one of the local COVID hospitals and is just exhausted, physically and mentally. I am trying to see my department and my patients through this and keep all safe, which is not as easy as it sounds, a balancing act no one is prepared for. The weather has been rainy and cold, so our outside time has been more limited than I had hoped.

My DS is smart. The workload is not extreme. If he would focus he could do all of the assignments in less than an hour. But he drags his feet and whines and yells and cries and gets really frustrated. He hates his Zoom meetings. He hates PE over Zoom, and won't even let me put on the music class. Even doing assignments that he normally enjoys, like writing stories, has become like pulling teeth to get him to write a full sentence.

I know he doesn't not have the executive function to sit and do a list of 15 things, but I am helping with that. The tech aspect of it can be convoluted, but I am helping with that. But pretty regularly, especially if I try to correct his work in any way, he is shouting things like "it's none of your business and you can't just go around telling people what to do!" followed by tears, running into his room, and slamming the door behind him.

I am trying very hard to be sympathetic. I know he is hurting and anxious just like DH and I. I've reached out to the teacher to explain that I know his work is sometimes shoddy and half done, but it's the best we can do. I know things are tough, but I also want him to have a bit of grit. I don't want him to think that if something is hard/boring or if he isn't feeling 100% he can just not do it. That's quite obviously not the way the world works, not by a long shot (as I sit here and contemplate doing things in my job I haven't seen in 10+ years).

Has anyone been able to help their kids deal emotionally with homeschooling, if they aren't naturally cut out for it? What strategies are you using to help with the adjustment? I am running under the assumption he won't be back in real school until the fall.

[petesgirl]

I really wish I could help, but all I can do is offer hugs. We are in the same boat. My DS does not learn well over technology. He is an active learner, and does best with a lot of interaction and hands on stuff. Even when school was in and they had certain things to complete on chromebooks he struggled and now it's even worse because everything is online. It's a battle here every single freakin day and my 2 yr old spends much of his morning watching PBS kids because DS needs me to sit right by him and help. The struggle is real.

[SnuggleBuggles]

For a second grader, I’d just back off. Let him do what he enjoys and don’t sweat the rest. But, I know I’m a broken record and already said this. I just think that the extra stress and pressure is super unnecessary. Missing some work one quarter of 2nd grade for a kid who isn’t struggling is just so minor. Buy some video games (Minecraft would be great) and just chill.


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[westwoodmom04]

For a second grader, I’d just back off. Let him do what he enjoys and don’t sweat the rest. But, I know I’m a broken record and already said this. I just think that the extra stress and pressure is super unnecessary. Missing some work one quarter of 2nd grade for a kid who isn’t struggling is just so minor. Buy some video games (Minecraft would be great) and just chill.


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This, second graders are going to get much out of distance learning, it's mostly a means to keep them occupied. If it's just torture, drop it, it won't matter.

[petesgirl]

For a second grader, I’d just back off. Let him do what he enjoys and don’t sweat the rest. But, I know I’m a broken record and already said this. I just think that the extra stress and pressure is super unnecessary. Missing some work one quarter of 2nd grade for a kid who isn’t struggling is just so minor. Buy some video games (Minecraft would be great) and just chill.


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I see people all over saying things like this and I wish it was that easy. But our teachers and district have not relaxed their expectations of the kids and they have made that very clear. What will happen next year if I don't force my kid to do his online learning? He will still be expected to know the material at some point.

[westwoodmom04]

I see people all over saying things like this and I wish it was that easy. But our teachers and district have not relaxed their expectations of the kids and they have made that very clear. What will happen next year if I don't force my kid to do his online learning? He will still be expected to know the material at some point.

They'll have to reteach it when the kids go back to school. Most of the first month of a new school year is review anyway.

[SnuggleBuggles]

I see people all over saying things like this and I wish it was that easy. But our teachers and district have not relaxed their expectations of the kids and they have made that very clear. What will happen next year if I don't force my kid to do his online learning? He will still be expected to know the material at some point.

Are you part of an online parent group for your school, like Facebook? It’s clear from the posts on our k-8 Facebook board that many families are calling it quits or doing the bare minimum. The last quarter will be pass/fail.
Most kids hit a summer slide so expectations are already low at the start of an elementary grade. More so now.
There are other ways to sneak learning in too. Play games that require skills you’re working on (reading, math...). Heck, the game Animal Crossing 2 is awesome for learning about finance.
Anyway, I really think there’s no need to put a bunch of pressure on your kiddo or self. Everyone is going to have to catch up next year.


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[smilequeen]

How is he keeping up socially with friends from school? I have an extroverted 3rd grader and I think it helps to be able to talk to his classmates. We got together via text and signed them all up for messenger kids. Screen stuff just has to be relaxed for their sake. This way they can talk and play together. He hasn’t had issues doing schoolwork. I can’t say for sure if this is why, but it doesn’t hurt that sometimes they get on messenger and do it together.

[Philly Mom]

I see people all over saying things like this and I wish it was that easy. But our teachers and district have not relaxed their expectations of the kids and they have made that very clear. What will happen next year if I don't force my kid to do his online learning? He will still be expected to know the material at some point.

Teachers may be saying that but they don't actually expect it. Teachers know that instead of spending the first month reteaching, they may need to spend more. Your kid is not alone. I do not have my kids do any of the extras. I would not make it a battle. It just does not make sense at this point. Read with them, play cards, do fun games that may work on some math skills. Help them through this time. School work is just not important.

[petesgirl]

Are you part of an online parent group for your school, like Facebook? It’s clear from the posts on our k-8 Facebook board that many families are calling it quits or doing the bare minimum. The last quarter will be pass/fail.
Most kids hit a summer slide so expectations are already low at the start of an elementary grade. More so now.
There are other ways to sneak learning in too. Play games that require skills you’re working on (reading, math...). Heck, the game Animal Crossing 2 is awesome for learning about finance.
Anyway, I really think there’s no need to put a bunch of pressure on your kiddo or self. Everyone is going to have to catch up next year.


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Yes, our school has a facebook page run by the principal herself and no, expectations here have no relaxed. I got a personal phone call last Friday (end of spring break) reminding me that all students are expected to be logged into their chromebooks during school hours (unless work is completed before 3:15) and that this is being monitored and will be included in their 4th term grades. My 3rd grader has 7-9 assignments to complete each day. Realistically, he could probably finish them all in about 3 hours but he just doesn't have the attention span to sit in front of a computer for that time without a lot of breaks so it drags on all day. I'm sick of it. I wouldn't mind homeschooling, but if we did that we wouldn't be filling out slides on classkick and google slides. I also wouldn't mind *some* assignments because it is nice to have something productive for him to do, but they are trying to re-create a full day in the classroom and it isn't working.