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  1. #21
    Kestrel is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    I read somewhere once to take baby steps about a pet. If the kid can keep a plant alive for a year, then revisit.

    Then keep a fish alive for a year, then revisit.

    Then, if they still want a dog, then talk about it.

  2. #22
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    Can you go to parent boot camp by yourself? I would totally check to see if they have online options. Our teen day treatment program went to a half day zoom session every day because of Covid. We are doing all of our outpatient mental health appointments through a video app. All of behavioral/mental healthcare has been forced to get creative and some of these options we are keeping because they work well. I would absolutely call
    Mom to:
    DS '02
    DS '05
    Percy--the wild furry child!!! 2022----
    Simon--the first King Charles cutie 2009-2022
    RIP Andy, the furry first child, 1996-2012

    "The task of any religion is not to tell us who we are entitled to hate but to teach us who we are required to love."

  3. #23
    lizzywednesday is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by StantonHyde View Post
    Can you go to parent boot camp by yourself? I would totally check to see if they have online options. Our teen day treatment program went to a half day zoom session every day because of Covid. We are doing all of our outpatient mental health appointments through a video app. All of behavioral/mental healthcare has been forced to get creative and some of these options we are keeping because they work well. I would absolutely call
    I've been under so much stress at the moment that I hadn't even considered asking if sessions were offered virtually at this time.

    Unfortunately, getting the time to do things is very difficult - DH seems to believe that spending time with DD is hard. She's 10, can carry on a conversation, and wants to spend time with him. I don't understand what his deal is.

    I've been able to get 1 hour here & there for Girl Scout trainings, about which he grumbles and whines, but I need those for me.
    ==========================================
    Liz
    DD (3/2010)

    "Make mistakes! Get messy!" - Miss Frizzle

  4. #24
    lizzywednesday is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kestrel View Post
    I read somewhere once to take baby steps about a pet. If the kid can keep a plant alive for a year, then revisit.

    Then keep a fish alive for a year, then revisit.

    Then, if they still want a dog, then talk about it.

    I was 11 when I got my cat, Shadow, as a kitten. My neighbors' cat had had kittens and I wanted one.

    I understood that it was my responsibility to:

    • Save money to pay for the initial vet visits (vaxes, spay/neuter, declawing - I know now that this is cruel, but didn't know then)
    • Save money to pay for the initial cat food (thought canned was better/found out that dry was actually the way to go)
    • Save money to pay for licensing and a collar (not applicable to all towns, but the license was proof of rabies vax)
    • Purchase and maintain the litter box (learned that scoopable litter is gross, I hate scooping poop, and litterbox liners are a lifesaver; also developed lifelong loyalty to brown-bottle Lysol Concentrate for getting male cat pee smells out of the litterbox & bathroom)
    • Feed/provide clean water for the cat daily (I bought food dishes and everything!)
    • Brush/comb cat & check for fleas
    • Pay for flea collar & change it regularly
    • If necessary, bathe the cat (I know that most people usually don't, but my brother had allergies, so we needed to)


    DD can barely keep her room neat. I am pretty sure that this is actually part of her ADHD, and something we need to work on - she gets overwhelmed by saying "clean your room" so I try to break it up into chunks ... we need to laminate a checklist for her so she can record daily/weekly/monthly tasks.

    I think trying to get her to take more responsibility for herself is something we can work on.
    Last edited by lizzywednesday; 05-29-2020 at 01:44 PM.
    ==========================================
    Liz
    DD (3/2010)

    "Make mistakes! Get messy!" - Miss Frizzle

  5. #25
    lizzywednesday is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    You guys, I just found my "DH is promising DD a dog" threads and learning my opinion of both his level of buy-in for dog-care and my inability to find the "want to" hasn't changed in 4 years is oddly comforting.

    In case you missed them the first go-round, they're here:

    Can I Warm Up to the Idea of a Dog? (June 2016)

    - and -

    Why Am I the Villain If I Don't Want a Dog? (November 2017)

    I definitely don't want a dog. Especially not now when we've worked super-hard to get the house cleaned up.
    ==========================================
    Liz
    DD (3/2010)

    "Make mistakes! Get messy!" - Miss Frizzle

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