Anybody's kids prefer remote?

[westwoodmom04]

My kids vastly prefer in person but are hybrid, so still have remote days. They chose in person or Remote by month. My high schooler has one friend who preferred to remote basically to sleep later and chose that for October (not out of any health concerns). She is returning for November in person because feels she is missing out (in person started at very end of September). At both schools, there is more movement towards in person as time goes by, and less than 10 percent of kids entirely remote.

However, in person kids can choose to be remote any day they feel like it, so at least at the high school level, some kids do occasionally do that if they want to sleep in,etc. . .

[newnana]

DD significantly prefers remote learning. Granted, she's in high school so it's a lot different than elementary. Her schoolwork is entirely asynchronous. There is no structured class time, no 30 minutes of attendance, no fussing with technical difficulties or distractions of what else is going on on her screen. She can take tests when she feels adequately prepared. She can review a unit she didn't feel like she got on the first pass. School work for her is complete for the day within about 3 hours, including multiple AP classes. She's getting great grades and loving what she's learning. She is working at her own pace, much better rested and not nearly as physically exhausted from having to be "on" for 8 (let's face it, 12) hours a day at school.

DD participates in her (many) clubs at her home school via remote calls and socialize with those friends on more relaxed/focused calls over something they love where they are all engaged, she is thrilled. The meetings are fun and with people she very much enjoys. Because they are on virtual meetings, she feels like there are less barriers without the masks and trouble hearing. She's a little anxious once anyone else returns to school and she doesn't how that might impact her social interactions as she won't have all the same shared experiences, but wants to give it a go. The rest of the school has also been entirely remote all year, but some kids may go hybrid soon, depending on how infection rates go. We'd let her stay remote as long as she's wants it. She has a ton more free time and is significantly happier. The school system offers it full time, it's not new for COVID, just new for us with COVID.

She has an ideal setup with her own office. DH and I work from home, also with our own offices. Before we reconfigured our living/working arrangement before school started, she said she could just work in her room. Both DH and I shot that down and did some creative problem solving to get us all separate sleeping/working setups so we could all focus. This configuration has been instrumental to all of our ability to navigate the situation for as long as we need.

[bisous]

Mine sees the pros and cons. His school is only remote so he can't compare but he misses being in person and interacting with teachers and students more naturally. If he had the option to go back, I think he would. He is a home body and a night owl so in other ways the remote fits him. But, I would absolutely let him decide if he wanted to go back and it was an option.

I'm letting my older kids decide but not my 6 and 8 yos. I think their preferences are important to consider but there are lots of issues at play!

[georgiegirl]

My 6th grader prefers remote learning. He has ADHD, anxiety, and OCD, and he is really thriving doing remote learning. He loves all of his teachers and he’s made new friends online. I like that I can help him with math homework (during lunch), and I know more of what he’s doing. It’s good for him because there are fewer distractions and he’s able to do what he wants during breaks or if he finishes his work early. He never gets in trouble (he was often chatty with friends and distracted them at school), and his teachers have nothing but amazing things to say about him.

DD (9th) wants to go back in person because she thinks classes are less boring that way, and she’s super social. But it’s fine for now. She does like how she can do homework in other classes that are boring. So she rarely has homework after school since she completes most of it during other classes and during lunch. She’s in a learning pod with her 3 best friends, so she still gets social interaction.

DS2 (1st) prefers remote. He is twice exceptional (on the autism spectrum, gifted, and has anxiety), so online school eliminates the noise and chaos. No more standing in line, no kids getting in your space, etc. However, he also refuses to do work he doesn’t like and there’s no way for me to get him to do it. And he’s refusing to go to his sped group. So pros and cons.


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[bisous]

DD significantly prefers remote learning. Granted, she's in high school so it's a lot different than elementary. Her schoolwork is entirely asynchronous. There is no structured class time, no 30 minutes of attendance, no fussing with technical difficulties or distractions of what else is going on on her screen. She can take tests when she feels adequately prepared. She can review a unit she didn't feel like she got on the first pass. School work for her is complete for the day within about 3 hours, including multiple AP classes. She's getting great grades and loving what she's learning. She is working at her own pace, much better rested and not nearly as physically exhausted from having to be "on" for 8 (let's face it, 12) hours a day at school.

DD participates in her (many) clubs at her home school via remote calls and socialize with those friends on more relaxed/focused calls over something they love where they are all engaged, she is thrilled. The meetings are fun and with people she very much enjoys. Because they are on virtual meetings, she feels like there are less barriers without the masks and trouble hearing. She's a little anxious once anyone else returns to school and she doesn't how that might impact her social interactions as she won't have all the same shared experiences, but wants to give it a go. The rest of the school has also been entirely remote all year, but some kids may go hybrid soon, depending on how infection rates go. We'd let her stay remote as long as she's wants it. She has a ton more free time and is significantly happier. The school system offers it full time, it's not new for COVID, just new for us with COVID.

She has an ideal setup with her own office. DH and I work from home, also with our own offices. Before we reconfigured our living/working arrangement before school started, she said she could just work in her room. Both DH and I shot that down and did some creative problem solving to get us all separate sleeping/working setups so we could all focus. This configuration has been instrumental to all of our ability to navigate the situation for as long as we need.

I'm thinking of some subtle reconfigs as we move forward. We're doing ok and we don't have the space for private offices for each of the kids but I'm working on some stuff... I think these kinds of tweaks can make a big difference!

[bisous]

Anyone run into the issue with the kids that WANT to be home being the ones that would benefit most from being in person and vice versa?

DS1 has done awesome in school since the start of quarantine but he had two friends move away recently and two other friends (brothers) have some very serious health complications and are completely isolating. DS1, who isn't an overly social guy is starting to really miss out on social interactions. He's 4 years older than DS2 and could really benefit from in person classes in some ways. He is also super happy to get more rest, loves being at home, and has health conditions that make in person school more risky for him (type 1 diabetes).

DS3 wants to be in person and could use the help as I've discovered that he's extremely behind academically. DD DOESN'T want to go to school and is doing very well at home, academically and otherwise.

It is so hard with multiple kids to figure it out!

(In the meantime, DS2 is seeing friends socially distanced, and thrives both in person and remotely. It is weird to have just one kid that DOESN'T struggle! He does well whatever is going on!)

[AnnieW625]

Mine sees the pros and cons. His school is only remote so he can't compare but he misses being in person and interacting with teachers and students more naturally. If he had the option to go back, I think he would. He is a home body and a night owl so in other ways the remote fits him. But, I would absolutely let him decide if he wanted to go back and it was an option.

This is very much my Dd1, but if given the option she will go back. She is a freshman in high school though and I get the feeling she feels like she is missing a bunch of stuff by having to be at home. My Dd1 can self police herself and complete work on time with very little guidance.

My Dd2 says she likes remote, but when given the option she will be doing back to school. Her fourth grade year last year was soo hard on her even pre Covid (demanding teacher who caused lots of school related anxiety for Dd2) and the start of 5th grade wasn’t great so we opted to place her back in 4th grade this year and it has been better 2 weeks into the 4th grade repeat, but she needs to be back on school.

Our county just spent a month off the California watch list, but the school (as well as the public school district) was still operating remotely and have been since the day school started in mid August. My county is now back on the most restrictive tier so no going back to school anytime soon. Both Dds schools have smaller numbers and a fair amount of space that they should be able to adequately address social distancing and have been provided with PPE.

I want to see what other counties with my county’s numbers are doing nationwide.


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[bisous]

This is very much my Dd1, but if given the option she will go back. She is a freshman in high school though and I get the feeling she feels like she is missing a bunch of stuff by having to be at home. My Dd1 can self police herself and complete work on time with very little guidance.

My Dd2 says she likes remote, but when given the option she will be doing back to school. Her fourth grade year last year was soo hard on her even pre Covid (demanding teacher who caused lots of school related anxiety for Dd2) and the start of 5th grade wasn’t great so we opted to place her back in 4th grade this year and it has been better 2 weeks into the 4th grade repeat, but she needs to be back on school.

Our county just spent a month off the California watch list, but the school (as well as the public school district) was still operating remotely and have been since the day school started in mid August. My county is now back on the most restrictive tier so no going back to school anytime soon. Both Dds schools have smaller numbers and a fair amount of space that they should be able to adequately address social distancing and have been provided with PPE.

I want to see what other counties with my county’s numbers are doing nationwide.


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Oh no! Your school was off the list and went back on? This is one of my fears. That we'll get to go back to school and then be pulled back again! I don't think it will be as disruptive to my kids as it will to me, lol!

[bisous]

My 6th grader prefers remote learning. He has ADHD, anxiety, and OCD, and he is really thriving doing remote learning. He loves all of his teachers and he’s made new friends online. I like that I can help him with math homework (during lunch), and I know more of what he’s doing. It’s good for him because there are fewer distractions and he’s able to do what he wants during breaks or if he finishes his work early. He never gets in trouble (he was often chatty with friends and distracted them at school), and his teachers have nothing but amazing things to say about him.

DD (9th) wants to go back in person because she thinks classes are less boring that way, and she’s super social. But it’s fine for now. She does like how she can do homework in other classes that are boring. So she rarely has homework after school since she completes most of it during other classes and during lunch. She’s in a learning pod with her 3 best friends, so she still gets social interaction.

DS2 (1st) prefers remote. He is twice exceptional (on the autism spectrum, gifted, and has anxiety), so online school eliminates the noise and chaos. No more standing in line, no kids getting in your space, etc. However, he also refuses to do work he doesn’t like and there’s no way for me to get him to do it. And he’s refusing to go to his sped group. So pros and cons.


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I know the circumstances in your state are very different from mine and I imagine you'll stick with remote as long as there are no mitigating accommodations for COVID at school, right? What will make you feel safe going back?

What would you pick if you could for your DS2? Would you consider 3 different plans for each of your kids?

[Philly Mom]

I have a 4th and 1st grader. We have been hybrid (4 1/2 days a week) for 3 weeks for my youngest and two for my oldest. My youngest was most excited. I think it has generally been good but maybe not as good as she hoped. Had she been in the other cohort, it would have been better. I still think it is generally much better for her than remote. She is getting more out of school in person. DD1 was anxious about returning and didn't want to at first. After 1 day in school, she was so thrilled to be back. She is SOO much happier. I think it has been really amazing for her. I am glad she went back.