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  1. #1
    ncat is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    Default DH neglected to walk DS2 to school today

    DH usually walks DS2 (2nd grade) to school, since he won't do pick up because it requires wearing a mask outside (probably should be the subject of a separate bitch). He is supposed to be at school by 8:40.
    I got home from walking the dog at 9. DS1 (home because remote schooling) had been texting that DS2 was still at home and DH was in a meeting. I guess he must have given up and walked himself to the school a few minutes before 9. I am livid - he has so much stuff to carry and also the crossing guard is long gone by 9. Plus, its disruptive to come in late. I called the school to make sure he got there ok. I don't even know where to start with DH but I'm beyond angry.
    ncat
    mama to DD 12/04, DS1 11/08, and DS2 7/13

  2. #2
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    I am with you in this. I sadly have nothing to add except to say that this is exactly the type of thing my DH would do.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    ~Elle

    DS1: 10/08 (the “tenager”)
    DS2: 07/18 (the wild one)

  3. #3
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    that's crazy! I'm sorry!

  4. #4
    jgenie is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    I’m so sorry. I would be hopping mad too!

  5. #5
    bisous is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    I'm so glad your DS is ok. I don't even know where to start on that one! Did you DH intend to walk him over once his meeting was done? I'm looking at your the ages of your kids and walking to school alone (especially when nobody knows that he is on the way) would make me really nervous! Does your DH want your kids to be more independent? My DH walked himself to school in K. Granted, he had a twin brother so they walked together but it still boggles my mind. Maybe in some circles this kind of thing is not so unusual?

  6. #6
    gatorsmom is offline Pink Diamond level (15,000+ posts)
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    I’m sorry. That’s frustrating and scary. And I’d be livid at my Dh too. Hopefully it was a one-time mix up and your Dh just had a momentary brain block? On the bright side, your ds2 got himself safely to school. If you thank him and reward him for that, it could lift up his confidence. A little more self-reliance and self confidence in kids is never a bad thing!
    " I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is only temporary; the evil it does is permanent." Mahatma Gandhi

    "This is the ultimate weakness of violence: It multiplies evil and violence in the universe. It doesn't solve any problems." Martin Luther King, Jr.

  7. #7
    hbridge is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    YIKES!!! That is a tough one for you on both fronts.

    Your DH needs to understand the gravity of what COULD have happened and you need a plan for it to NEVER happen again. Better communication when he will not be available, a neighbor who is also walking kids that he can call... a plan is needed.

    Your son needs to be rewarded for getting himself to school, but he also needs a plan. He did a great job, but if it happens again, make sure he knows what to do... should he walk himself to school, call you, call a neighbor, get his brother to walk him when his brother has a break from classes; the boy needs to know what to do "next time". Hopefully, there will never be a "next time", but having a plan will provide some guidance for the unexpected.

    There are so many different things happening in every household with different routines on different days, some people home/some not... Everyone is constantly scrambling to figure it all out.

  8. #8
    doberbrat is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by hbridge View Post
    YIKES!!! That is a tough one for you on both fronts.

    Your DH needs to understand the gravity of what COULD have happened and you need a plan for it to NEVER happen again. Better communication when he will not be available, a neighbor who is also walking kids that he can call... a plan is needed.

    Your son needs to be rewarded for getting himself to school, but he also needs a plan. He did a great job, but if it happens again, make sure he knows what to do... should he walk himself to school, call you, call a neighbor, get his brother to walk him when his brother has a break from classes; the boy needs to know what to do "next time". Hopefully, there will never be a "next time", but having a plan will provide some guidance for the unexpected.

    There are so many different things happening in every household with different routines on different days, some people home/some not... Everyone is constantly scrambling to figure it all out.
    sounds like my dh. I'd be livid as well. I'm sorry. But 2nd grade is a good time to learn to problem solve - he did solve the problem but it could have been done a bit more safely. Who could he call and how?

    As an aside, does dh not need to wear the mask for am drop off?
    dd1 10/05
    dd2 11/09
    and ... a mini poodle!

  9. #9
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    Wow! I'd be livid! Did your DH just plain forgot? Was he in a meeting at home or out of the house?
    Mommy to 2 DS's (2003 and 2007)

  10. #10
    ncat is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    I talked to DH and I still don't understand what happened. I think DH's meeting ran over and he lost track of time. But DH seemed upset with DS2 (7 years old) that he did not interrupt his call and tell him it was time to leave. And DS2 was really upset and worried about interrupting his father.

    It sounds like DS2 went to the corner with the crosswalk and looked for cars before crossing the street, which makes me happy. (If he did not, at least he knows that this was the right answer for where/how did you cross the street).

    In a normal year we would very likely be letting DS2 walk to/from school by himself. This year the kids have so much to carry with their laptops and class materials - they are bringing everything back and forth just in case school goes remote due to a positive covid case or winter weather. If I take him, while walking the dog, I will help him with his stuff and get him across the street safely then let him go the last bit on his own. DH can do drop off without a mask because it doesn't require hanging out on school property. (I generally don't wear a mask for drop off either, there isn't really any need to). For pick up, we need to wait around for his teacher to release the kids and bring them to the exit door so masks are required.
    ncat
    mama to DD 12/04, DS1 11/08, and DS2 7/13

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