How do I reciprocate this gift?

[daisyd]

So I have a couple of mom friends (2 of DS's friends' mothers) who gave me very generous birthday gifts. It was rather unexpected. We normally don't exchange gifts for birthdays. I've bought a gift for one mom's milestone birthday a few years ago when I was invited to her party. But its usually a text/email to acknowledge birthdays.

Do I leave it at a thank you card and plan a gift for their next birthday? I find gift giving stressful especially because I find it hard to be creative. Plus we live frugally/normally don't splurge and these friends live on a different scale. I know I'm overthinking this (sigh). I feel grateful to have these moms in our life and I appreciate their generosity. I just can't compete

[JustMe]

Don't compete! Send a heartfelt thank you note and, when its their birthdays, if you want to do something in addition to text/e-mail, a heartfelt card. You can possibly add an affordable gift if you would feel better. Who knows why they chose to give you a gift this year, and it was kind of them. Some people boost their spirits by doing nice things for others and maybe they needed some of that boost. I have seen some people give more expensive/substantial gifts during the pandemic when they are able to as it either makes them feel good or they want to boost others. Regardless of their reason, that does not mean you need to do exactly the same as them.

[daisyd]

Don't compete! Send a heartfelt thank you note and, when its their birthdays, if you want to do something in addition to text/e-mail, a heartfelt card. You can possibly add an affordable gift if you would feel better. Who knows why they chose to give you a gift this year, and it was kind of them. Some people boost their spirits by doing nice things for others and maybe they needed some of that boost. I have seen some people give more expensive/substantial gifts during the pandemic when they are able to as it either makes them feel good or they want to boost others. Regardless of their reason, that does not mean you need to do exactly the same as them.

Thanks for taking the time to weigh in. I'm feeling much better already!

[gymnbomb]

Thanks for taking the time to weigh in. I'm feeling much better already!

I am sure the gift givers would not want their gifts to create any stress or anxiety for you!


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[daisyd]

I am sure the gift givers would not want their gifts to create any stress or anxiety for you!


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You are absolutely right! Thanks for the perspective.

[petesgirl]

Don't compete! Send a heartfelt thank you note and, when its their birthdays, if you want to do something in addition to text/e-mail, a heartfelt card. You can possibly add an affordable gift if you would feel better. Who knows why they chose to give you a gift this year, and it was kind of them. Some people boost their spirits by doing nice things for others and maybe they needed some of that boost. I have seen some people give more expensive/substantial gifts during the pandemic when they are able to as it either makes them feel good or they want to boost others. Regardless of their reason, that does not mean you need to do exactly the same as them.

100% agree.
I'm the same as you, though, I would be completely overthinking it too.

[daisyd]

100% agree.
I'm the same as you, though, I would be completely overthinking it too.

Thanks. And hugs, I appreciate your weighing in

[trales]

Some people need to shop when they are stressed, my sister does this and then mails me things. It makes her happy. I would assume, they just really felt good doing it. I would just thank them.

[daisyd]

Some people need to shop when they are stressed, my sister does this and then mails me things. It makes her happy. I would assume, they just really felt good doing it. I would just thank them.

Thanks Tracey. I think you're absolutely right. These friends find joy in gift giving.

[firstbaby]

I agree that you should not feel any pressure to reciprocate in terms of $ but I would try to find something thoughtful for their birthdays. It could even be an activity together depending on what comfort level you have with being in person when their birthdays roll around - coffee date, pedicure date, a day hike, etc