My DD is younger (12) and I also hadn’t planned to get her a phone. Hers is really more for emergencies, if she needs to call from school, etc. I locked it down pretty tight. She cannot receive phone calls or texts from numbers not on her contact list. She also can’t text/call except this list. I erased most of the apps and she needs to have me add anything she needs. The phone doesn’t do many things after her bedtime as I have it set as downtime. I got her a kids Apple ID which gives me a lot of power over the device. I can’t remember all the details but I know I googled around a bit on how to set up an iPhone for a kid and I believe common sense media had the best advice on setting things up. If many of her friends who she communicates with have phones I’m not aware of it as she hasn’t asked me to add them. She mainly uses apps or video calling on her chromebook to communicate with other kids at this point.
momma to DD 12/08 & DS 3/13