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  1. #1
    petesgirl is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    Default WWYD: neighbor kids playing in my yard

    We live on a corner lot near our neighborhood playground and a walking path. The walking path connects our community to a larger park and also to an apartment complex. There are a lot of kids that live in the apartments that wander through our neighborhood unsupervised. I haven't seen them cause much trouble however some of our neighbors have had to call the police on some of them before due to the kids throwing rocks and damaging property. Last night DS was in our backyard jumping on the trampoline and 2 of the kids saw him from the path and asked if they could jump so he invited them in. I don't have a problem with this. A few more kids straggled in until their were 5 on trampoline which I think is too many. It was getting late anyway and I told them it was time to head home. A few of them protested a bit and asked to stay longer but eventually they all left.
    They are back today. They knocked but I didn't answer the door because I was on the phone and they just went around to the back yard (ungated on one side) and started jumping. I went out and told them that DS isn't home but they are welcome to play, but that they DO need to knock and only play if someone is home instead of just going to the backyard themselves. Now there are 6 kids in my back yard that I don't know.
    I'm worried about them jumping on our trampoline and getting hurt. The few neighbor kids that come over to play with DS know we have a trampoline and their parents have told me it's ok for them to jump. I don't know the parents of these kids. I also don't like that they helped themselves to my back yard after I didn't answer my door and that more kids have joined them. I know they need an outside energy outlet that they don't get from apartment living and I want to be friendly and kind but.... WWYD? I'm afraid we are going to have all sorts of kids we don't know playing in our backyard when we aren't home and I'm not ok with that.
    Last edited by petesgirl; 04-14-2021 at 08:19 PM.
    Mama to :
    DS1 (July 2011)
    DD (Feb 2014-June 2015)
    DS2 (Apr 2017)

    "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...Until you climb inside his skin and walk around in it."
    --Atticus Finch (To Kill A Mockingbird)

  2. #2
    mom2binsd is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    I'm sorry you are in this position, and I appreciate that you understand kids who live in an apartment don't have many play options. But I'm not sure what to suggest (and I tend to be one of the more relaxed parents on this board), but I can see this spinning out of control very quickly. I absolutely agree that they can't just come into your yard and jump without you guys being out there too. I think you may have to put up a sign, to still seem friendly, but stating that the yard/trampoline is not available for use unless you are present. I would double check what your homeowners policy says about trampolines (my kids have been injured on one) and it is one of the reasons we didn't get one/our policy would go up quite a bit too. I'm afraid since you have already allowed them to jump even when your child is not there they may take it as that it is ok to continue to do so.

    Also, for safety sake, kids should honestly jump on their own (I know tandem jumping is fun I did it as a kid and my neighbor launched up about 20 feet in the air and luckily one of the big kids caught me before I hit the lawn). I'd look at the safest way to jump (no shoes/no loose strings on hoodies etc) and make sure your kids are aware of everything.

  3. #3
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Ugh. That spiraled fast I think you need a sign, rules and check with insurance like pp said. I would really be reluctant to let kids whose parents I don’t know ever use your trampoline. I think they are unsafe worry about what would happen if one got injured. How do you reach a parent? Will they be reasonable if get upset with you? It’s just a can of worms.


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  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by SnuggleBuggles View Post
    Ugh. That spiraled fast I think you need a sign, rules and check with insurance like pp said. I would really be reluctant to let kids whose parents I don’t know ever use your trampoline. I think they are unsafe worry about what would happen if one got injured. How do you reach a parent? Will they be reasonable if get upset with you? It’s just a can of worms.


    Sent from my iPhone using Baby Bargains
    I agree with the above. I really applaud you for welcoming the kids but feel there is too much liability involved with a trampoline. It's okay to give them a set of rules that make you more comfortable with the situation. I would be kind but firm and explain that they are not allowed in your yard without your permission under any circumstances. Don't be afraid to tell them no if it's not a good time. These are the same rules your kids and their friends already follow so don't feel guilty setting boundaries and enforcing them.
    Mom to Two Wild and Crazy Boys and One Sweet Baby Girl

  5. #5
    petesgirl is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by SnuggleBuggles View Post
    Ugh. That spiraled fast I think you need a sign, rules and check with insurance like pp said. I would really be reluctant to let kids whose parents I don’t know ever use your trampoline. I think they are unsafe worry about what would happen if one got injured. How do you reach a parent? Will they be reasonable if get upset with you? It’s just a can of worms.


    Sent from my iPhone using Baby Bargains
    Parents are a problem....this apartment complex is government subsidized and Most of the families are refugees from other countries. These kids barely speak English. I suspect that their parents are all working because there are kids of all ages (even young toddlers) wandering our neighborhood at all hours of the day. In general they don’t seem to cause trouble but I have one neighbor who calls the police weekly about them being out unsupervised, but nothing ever changes. I really don’t want to be unkind to these kids but I am uncomfortable with this situation. I guess we need to tell DS that he can’t let them in to play anymore either, which I hate doing because we try to be really inclusive and I love that he doesn’t mind playing with kids of different nationality that speak different languages. I kind of feel like asking DH to take the trampoline back down for this summer. Ugh.
    Last edited by petesgirl; 04-14-2021 at 07:41 PM.
    Mama to :
    DS1 (July 2011)
    DD (Feb 2014-June 2015)
    DS2 (Apr 2017)

    "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...Until you climb inside his skin and walk around in it."
    --Atticus Finch (To Kill A Mockingbird)

  6. #6
    khm is offline Ruby level (4000+ posts)
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    Your insurance agent would lose his/her MIND. It sucks, but no, the neighborhood kids cannot just help themselves to your trampoline. It is a huge liability on your part.

  7. #7
    MSWR0319 is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    You said it is ungated, any chance you could easily put a gate up to close them off? Otherwise I think you're going to have to tell them they can't jump anymore. I'd be so worried about what would happen if someone got hurt since you don't know any of their parents. That could be a big mess. But it is so sweet of you to be so kind!

  8. #8
    twowhat? is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    Eeeek I'd be worried too! It would suck to have to take the trampoline down though for our DS and the kids who have parent approval to jump. Is there any way you can gate your yard like MSW mentioned above? I feel like just telling them they can't jump anymore may not work so in my mind it's either gate the yard or take down the trampoline

    eta: don't feel guilty as this is a safety concern...you say there's a park nearby so there's things to do outside that aren't a trampoline. If you feel bad, maybe keep a few basketballs in your yard that the kids are free to borrow and return (if there are hoops at the park), or frisbees, etc.
    Last edited by twowhat?; 04-14-2021 at 08:48 PM.

  9. #9
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    I’d put a stop to kids coming into your yard and jumping on the trampoline. It really doesn’t matter if you know the parents or not. If a kid breaks their arm in your backyard the ER will ask where it happened and their medical insurance will go after your homeowners insurance. It doesn’t have to be the intention of the injured party. Your DS can still play with these kids at the public playground and if you are comfortable with the risk of a couple friends who you feel wouldn’t do anything too risky using your trampoline maybe that’s a compromise, but your yard being open to the public obviously won’t work.
    momma to DD 12/08 & DS 3/13

  10. #10
    jgenie is online now Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    I’m sorry you’re in this position. You cannot have children you don’t know jumping on your trampoline. An accident could turn your life upside down. I agree that the safest option is to install a fence. If you can’t do that, take down the trampoline for a while and then try again in a month or so.

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