How to go about outsourcing domestic/household work

[twowhat?]

I'm kinda hearing you about wanting things done a certain way...like DH will do dishes but he'll never finish them completely. There's always a pot left unwashed on the stove, food not put away, etc. It drives me insane and makes me want to do it myself, so that I can do it well and thoroughly (eg my standards). But, it's just not a battle to fight. So I either leave the unwashed pot on the stove for him to find in the morning, or wash the one pot myself and try to not be annoyed (doesn't work...still annoyed).

One of DDs chores is to vacuum but they do such a crappy job of it, they don't go along the baseboards to pick up all the fur and dirt that gets pushed there. OMG drives me insane, it's like the job isn't done when it's not done well. But I keep my mouth shut and try not to be annoyed (doesn't work...still annoyed).

Laundry - DH uses too much detergent and not enough rinses. We have decided that he only does his and the kids laundry - mine remains mine to do.

No one cleans toilets as clean as I do. Etc, etc.

All that's to say I agree that we have to relax our standards. But I also want to say that this is HARD. And everyone's thresholds are different. DH could care less about fur and dirt all over the floor and dust all over surfaces. I can't stand that and must vacuum and dust regularly. But I can let clutter go as long as it's clean...DH cannot STAND clutter.

Dinner - I require everyone to come up with one dinner idea each week and this helps A LOT. No one realizes the mental energy that goes into meal planning! If everyone just picked something out of one of our recipe books, or even just an idea that they'd like to try, it takes so much less mental energy to just make a grocery list based on those recipes and go shopping.

Grocery - my super busy friends (2+ kids) do grocery delivery. I don't do it...yet...because I like to see what I'm getting and have control over substitutions. BUT - this is a HUGE time saver and I would encourage you to do it! Even for Costco...InstaCart!

Cleaning - agree with cleaning person coming more frequently, ESPECIALLY if you are happy with the work she does. ESPECIALLY. Make it a chore for each person to put away their own clutter prior to each cleaning visit.

Volunteer work - cut what you can, seriously. It's time and mental energy, and maybe you can feel better about it if you tell yourself you will add some back once you get into the swing of things.

GOOD LUCK!

[roobee]

I recently replied to an ad for a household assistant. It's for a married couple with no kids or pets and their ad offered $18 to $25 per hour, plus tips/bonuses for about 15 hours per week. I'd say we're in a MCOL area. I make more than that at my part-time job, but I don't want to do that job full-time. I'm honestly just looking for something more to do during the days since I've finished most of the household projects that I'm capable of doing around here.

I had a Zoom interview with the couple and I'm really hoping they decide to hire me. Their main concerns during the interview were about household organization and being new homeowners and needing help managing the maintenance of their home. I gather that they need help with shopping, meal planning, routine stuff like oil changes, etc. They mentioned wanting someone to be sure the trash is brought to the curb when they're out of town and preparing their house for out of town guests. All these things sound fun to me (with the exception of the trash)!

One thing that has made a big difference at our house is grocery delivery, though I've cut back on that a lot recently and switched to using drive-up services. I also think mise en place is important, things like getting fruits/veggies washed and cut up before putting them in the fridge, organizing serveware prior to hosting a party, etc.

They sent an email inviting me to come to their home for an in-person interview, but they didn't tell me their address - lol! They mentioned wanting to offload some of the mental burdens of running their house, I think they're just overwhelmed. I would love to work for them for a bit of pay and some appreciation, something that's seriously lacking for me at home.

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[twowhat?]

I recently replied to an ad for a household assistant. It's for a married couple with no kids or pets and their ad offered $18 to $25 per hour, plus tips/bonuses for about 15 hours per week. I'd say we're in a MCOL area. I make more than that at my part-time job, but I don't want to do that job full-time. I'm honestly just looking for something more to do during the days since I've finished most of the household projects that I'm capable of doing around here.

I had a Zoom interview with the couple and I'm really hoping they decide to hire me. Their main concerns during the interview were about household organization and being new homeowners and needing help managing the maintenance of their home. I gather that they need help with shopping, meal planning, routine stuff like oil changes, etc. They mentioned wanting someone to be sure the trash is brought to the curb when they're out of town and preparing their house for out of town guests. All these things sound fun to me (with the exception of the trash)!

One thing that has made a big difference at our house is grocery delivery, though I've cut back on that a lot recently and switched to using drive-up services. I also think mise en place is important, things like getting fruits/veggies washed and cut up before putting them in the fridge, organizing serveware prior to hosting a party, etc.

They sent an email inviting me to come to their home for an in-person interview, but they didn't tell me their address - lol! They mentioned wanting to offload some of the mental burdens of running their house, I think they're just overwhelmed. I would love to work for them for a bit of pay and some appreciation, something that's seriously lacking for me at home.

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They may be waiting for you to confirm that you want an in-person interview before giving away their home address to basically a stranger...maybe? At least that's how I sell things locally - I don't give out my exact address for pickups until they text me that they are actually on their way over.

[roobee]

They may be waiting for you to confirm that you want an in-person interview before giving away their home address to basically a stranger...maybe? At least that's how I sell things locally - I don't give out my exact address for pickups until they text me that they are actually on their way over.

Could be! I do the same thing with online transactions like that. They scheduled an in-person interview for Tuesday at 10am and I replied that I'll be there, I just need their address. I'll reach out again Monday evening or Tuesday morning. I'm pretty resourceful and found their address using google so I did get a sneak peak of their house from the listing photos.

I remembered a few other things that are helpful for our family! I use a housekeeping app called Tody, you can put any tasks you want in there and you can assign tasks to family members. I like checking things off like descaling the coffee maker, cleaning the oven or flipping the mattresses, it keeps me on task. My family doesn't use it, but they could, or you could share it with a household helper. I also really like this meal planner/grocery list, it works well with how my brain works, but you could easily find another free printable online. http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_kk0oLcKPpt...0/meal+planner. I also use a Christmas List app for gift ideas and budgeting, I told my friends about it and they love it too - https://play.google.com/store/apps/d...d=com.xmaslist.

[California]

They sent an email inviting me to come to their home for an in-person interview, but they didn't tell me their address - lol! They mentioned wanting to offload some of the mental burdens of running their house, I think they're just overwhelmed. I would love to work for them for a bit of pay and some appreciation, something that's seriously lacking for me at home.

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Total side note:
Roobee, this made me think of my grandma. When my grandma had a busy, hectic household full of loud teens, she went to work part time for a small family. They were so grateful for her help! She found the job really easy to do, and loved being in their peaceful house. I've seen a few photos of her at that time at their house and she looks very content!

[roobee]

Total side note:
Roobee, this made me think of my grandma. When my grandma had a busy, hectic household full of loud teens, she went to work part time for a small family. They were so grateful for her help! She found the job really easy to do, and loved being in their peaceful house. I've seen a few photos of her at that time at their house and she looks very content!

I love this! A little appreciation or the satisfaction of a job well done (even if it's just the household shopping and maintenance) goes a long way!



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[#2ontheway]

I'm slow to get back to this thread but wanted to post! So appreciate all the tips. And have already made changes! Most notably immediately increased our house cleaning to once a week. And in between I'm trying - deep breaths! - to let things go! It's liberating! And hard, but I keep telling myself that it's okay. Our house is fully dirty and ready to be cleaned in a week which tells me how much I've been doing in between. When school starts I really think I'll consider more of a housekeeper schedule so that I can take on more paid work. Great tip. And getting organized but thinking we'll start grocery delivery too. These pieces feel like they'll help. It helps that I have a house cleaner who is willing to do some "picking up" - know that's not always the case. And maybe some progress? husband wants to "pick up" for the cleaner.

Thanks again for the commiseration. It's not totally solved but I definitely feel less crazy.