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  1. #1
    hbridge is online now Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    Default I hate living in fear of COVID, all the time!

    So DH just left for a concert... An indoor concert at a huge venue! We are all vaccinated, but most of the household with the J&J vaccine... The venue is requiring proof of vaccination or proof of recent test AND masking (but we all know how much masking is usually followed at events). DH will stay masked.

    I am not comfortable with this AT ALL!!! DH tried to "sell" his tickets, but was unable to do so and really wants to go to the concert. He is desperate for "normal", I am desperate to keep the family safe! He says "worst case scenario, I get sick". I say "worst case scenario one of us gets really sick/dies" and/or "DC miss many weeks of college/high school due to catching covid or exposure". He just rolls his eyes and tells me I am insane and the risk is low of even catching covid from the concert.

    He and I are definitely not on the same page for risk. Half the family (including me) still wears mask everyone, including outside; goes few places; are very cautious. The other half (including DH) only wears a mask when required and will take risks like eating indoors in a restaurant.

    I know he will not test in 5 days. We don't have the space for him to sleep in another room for a week, we just have to hope and pray!!! I keep telling myself that it is no more risk than flying or going out to eat, but it just feels more risky!

    I HATE THIS!!! Pre-covid I would just tell him to have fun and move on for a fun evening with the kids!

    How much longer are we going to have to live with every decision feeling like life or death?

  2. #2
    gymnbomb is online now Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    Ugh, yes. This would not be ok with me either. My DH also has a higher risk tolerance than I do. My (vaccinated but high risk) mom is sick and has a negative rapid Covid test but I wonít breathe easily until her PCR comes back. I just constantly feel like I am just waiting for the other shoe to drop.


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  3. #3
    SnuggleBuggles is online now Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Default I hate living in fear of COVID, all the time!

    Iím not ready for a packed indoor concert but otherwise Iím very much more your dh. And my dh is more like you. I donít know. My stress and worry just isnít high. We are vaccinated and everything i see just indicates that people fare well, even if they do get it. We donít have any work or school issues- we can all still easily be at home, if needed.
    Eta- OP I do hope you all stay germ free! I hope the next days of stress arenít too bad.

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    Last edited by SnuggleBuggles; 4 Weeks Ago at 05:36 PM.

  4. #4
    smilequeen is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    Is someone in your home high risk? Low risk vaccinated individuals are really not ending up with severe cases of covid at a rate worth putting yourself through so much worry. You do other, riskier things every day.

    Which...I'm not saying I want to hang out in a crowd at a concert right now because I just don't want to get sick, period. We have concert tickets next weekend in a private suite with some vaccinated friends and I'm cool with that, but I wouldn't be super comfortable in a crowd.

    Risk analysis just doesn't make me feel stressed anymore. I don't want covid for various reasons, but I'm not scared of it at this point.

    If someone is high risk though...that's a whole different risk analysis.
    Mama to my boys (04,07,11)

  5. #5
    PZMommy is offline Diamond level (5000+ posts)
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    I’m with you! Of course my youngest is high risk and not old enough to be vaccinated so that plays into my concerns. As it is, 3 classes at the school I work at (and he attends) are closed and in quarantine due to covid cases. We don’t have a virtual option this year, otherwise my kids would not be attending school. This week my oldest spiked a fever of 102, and I literally had a breakdown. Thankfully all of our tests came back negative, but we are extremely cautious still, and I’m so tired of having to second guess everything we do.

  6. #6
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    Maybe you would feel better if he took a binaxnow or similar test daily for several days starting Monday or Tuesday. I’m starting to become more convinced that while these tests might not catch every case they are a useful tool for catching contagious COVID. They’re unfortunately hard to come by, but at ~$10/test seem like a good tool. They should really be less expensive and more widely available. It’s my understanding that they aren’t expensive to produce and you can get them easily for a fraction of the price in Europe. They’re most useful used serially as they aren’t as reliable as PCR.
    momma to DD 12/08 & DS 3/13

  7. #7
    SnuggleBuggles is online now Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by Snow mom View Post
    Maybe you would feel better if he took a binaxnow or similar test daily for several days starting Monday or Tuesday. Iím starting to become more convinced that while these tests might not catch every case they are a useful tool for catching contagious COVID. Theyíre unfortunately hard to come by, but at ~$10/test seem like a good tool. They should really be less expensive and more widely available. Itís my understanding that they arenít expensive to produce and you can get them easily for a fraction of the price in Europe. Theyíre most useful used serially as they arenít as reliable as PCR.
    My friend was sharing how her friend in Germany uses rapid self tests at home before get togethers and such. They cost $.80. Wouldnít it be nice to have a big old stash of tests for less than $1/ each that you can do at home?


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  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by SnuggleBuggles View Post
    My friend was sharing how her friend in Germany uses rapid self tests at home before get togethers and such. They cost $.80. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a big old stash of tests for less than $1/ each that you can do at home?


    Sent from my iPhone using Baby Bargains
    I really wish this had become the norm for our country. It would be freeing to hang out with a group of friends, knowing we had all tested negative before getting together. Half of my fear is of our family spreading Covid to others.

    OP, I'm probably not as cautious as you are but I get living like the other shoe is getting ready to drop. I watch friends out living their best lives and wish I could let loose and do the same. We went to a college football game today. It was great to participate in something "normal" but I couldn't completely stop thinking about how many people were there.
    Mom to Two Wild and Crazy Boys and One Sweet Baby Girl

  9. #9
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    Iím there with you but the danger here is more real. Ds2 (8) comes home from school every day telling me who has been coughing and who is absent. Masks are not required and DS has had to sit within 2-3 feet of kids who are unmasked and actively coughing. I am so stressed out. Iím raging mad because our school board voted against a mask mandate even though a federal judge determined that not masking violates the civil rights of kids with disabilities. Iím in the process of stating a lawsuit with other parents of kids with IEPs

    That said Iím letting DD (15) go to a Harry Styles concert this week because itís way safer than school. At school, less than 10% of HS kids wear masks. No distancing. Normal lunch. Assemblies like usual. No notification, no quarantine if close family contact tests positive. The concert requires proof of vaccination (or negative Covid test w/in 72 hours) plus mandatory masking.
    DD (3/06)
    DS1 (7/09)
    DS2 (8/13)

  10. #10
    hbridge is online now Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    OP here... Thanks all. DH came home and said he felt it was safe...proof of vaccination required before entering the venue and masks required (he said about 95% compliance). He has gone to a few other events in the last few months that he stated were "10X more risky than this one". I am definitely feeling better about things.



    Quote Originally Posted by georgiegirl View Post
    I’m there with you but the danger here is more real. Ds2 (8) comes home from school every day telling me who has been coughing and who is absent. Masks are not required and DS has had to sit within 2-3 feet of kids who are unmasked and actively coughing. I am so stressed out. I’m raging mad because our school board voted against a mask mandate even though a federal judge determined that not masking violates the civil rights of kids with disabilities. I’m in the process of stating a lawsuit with other parents of kids with IEPs

    That said I’m letting DD (15) go to a Harry Styles concert this week because it’s way safer than school. At school, less than 10% of HS kids wear masks. No distancing. Normal lunch. Assemblies like usual. No notification, no quarantine if close family contact tests positive. The concert requires proof of vaccination (or negative Covid test w/in 72 hours) plus mandatory masking.
    That is insane about schools. Especially with kids too young for the vaccine. I would be a wreck as well. Parents are so stressed and tensions are so high, kids WILL be coming to school sick and Covid will spread! ARGH!!!

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