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  1. #11
    Myira is offline Platinum level (1000+ posts)
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    What an interesting thread, I am yet to read all replies. But I will share what my family does. My DH is an early riser, he is also very disciplined about his bedtime, so he is not one to stay up for anything on Netflix. Honestly I cannot afford to either, but I sometimes I do and then pay the price the next day.
    So Kids and I are up anytime between 7-8 and in DHís eyes itís late! I donít make any special breakfast so either itís oatmeal or English muffins. By the time breakfast is done, the kids and I start on studies, mostly math, DD also does science. None of its is regular schoolwork, itís all enrichment. Around 9:30-10 I may make a smoothie since DD has dance and has to leave at 11. We carpool but if itís our turn DH will take her while I take DS for his swim practice. We are home and lunch is done by 1:30-2. I usually make the kids get back at studies but DS does not always comply, especially if Iím working with DD, he will sneak away. These past few weekends they have been taking private tennis lessons and we head out for those around 3:30. Evening I cook, kids may watch a bit of tv. DH mows the lawn, does grocery, I do some cleaning, do everyones laundry and fold clothes and the day is over with still n things on the todo list. DH also tries to work some weekends or study for work, heís taking a certification so spent time studying for it. I spend most of my free time on the kids. Sunday, we donít have outside activities but itís just catching up on household chores that did not get done. Sunday night builds up pressure for me to get cooking prep done but I donít always manage to prep as well as Iíd like.
    My DHís number one grievance is that we donít do fun things. He feels I spend way too much time with kids studies and his solution just get a tutor. We argue about it a lot. I have recently started a cleaning lady come to do the bathrooms every 2 weeks cause it was killing me.


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    DD 10/2008
    DS 09/2011

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by essnce629 View Post
    Ha, I don't care about structure on weekends and if we don't have some type of scheduled activity then anything goes! I hate mornings so sleep in till 11:30am or later. I don't make breakfast on weekends (I do daily on school days) so DS2 fends for himself. I also don't cook dinner on weekends usually since I do that on weekdays too and DH is supposed to do dinner on weekends (which he usually "forgets" every week). After I roll out of bed at noon and get my coffee, I usually get into the jacuzzi until dinner! Anyone is free to join me. DS2 can play PS5 on weekends (not on school days) and is supposed to be off by 3pm. I do all my errands and laundry during the week (except for my bed linens which I usually do on Sat) so don't have much to do on weekends.

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  3. #13
    Mommy_Mea is offline Emerald level (3000+ posts)
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    A typical weekend that we are home consists of Friday night pizza/movie night, Saturday morning I am up really for a run or yoga, kids and DH sleep in/ snuggle until 8ish (we are early risers). Then we have sports/activities sprinkled through the day Saturday, and depending on timing we will go do a fun outing. Saturday night we might have friends over. Sunday is usually fairly open and we might again go and go for a hike/museum/etc. Sunday afternoon/evening is getting ready for the week.

    Sometimes I have a house project going on, and that will use up the free periods of the weekend.

    Sometimes I wish we did more of both, house projects and fun outings, but only so much time in the weekend

    There is a fair amount of downtime for DH and the kids sprinkled in there, I am a little more go-go-go on the weekends, I liked feeling accomplished at the end of the weekend!

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    Last edited by Mommy_Mea; 4 Weeks Ago at 09:34 AM.
    DS1 June 2009
    DS2 June 2011

  4. #14
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by Myira View Post
    What an interesting thread, I am yet to read all replies. But I will share what my family does. My DH is an early riser, he is also very disciplined about his bedtime, so he is not one to stay up for anything on Netflix. Honestly I cannot afford to either, but I sometimes I do and then pay the price the next day.
    So Kids and I are up anytime between 7-8 and in DHís eyes itís late! I donít make any special breakfast so either itís oatmeal or English muffins. By the time breakfast is done, the kids and I start on studies, mostly math, DD also does science. None of its is regular schoolwork, itís all enrichment. Around 9:30-10 I may make a smoothie since DD has dance and has to leave at 11. We carpool but if itís our turn DH will take her while I take DS for his swim practice. We are home and lunch is done by 1:30-2. I usually make the kids get back at studies but DS does not always comply, especially if Iím working with DD, he will sneak away. These past few weekends they have been taking private tennis lessons and we head out for those around 3:30. Evening I cook, kids may watch a bit of tv. DH mows the lawn, does grocery, I do some cleaning, do everyones laundry and fold clothes and the day is over with still n things on the todo list. DH also tries to work some weekends or study for work, heís taking a certification so spent time studying for it. I spend most of my free time on the kids. Sunday, we donít have outside activities but itís just catching up on household chores that did not get done. Sunday night builds up pressure for me to get cooking prep done but I donít always manage to prep as well as Iíd like.
    My DHís number one grievance is that we donít do fun things. He feels I spend way too much time with kids studies and his solution just get a tutor. We argue about it a lot. I have recently started a cleaning lady come to do the bathrooms every 2 weeks cause it was killing me.


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    Iím officially exhausted reading that!


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  5. #15
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    It totally depends on what you want to get out of your weekends. For "my" stuff around the house I am fortunate to have time during the week. So I've always loved Mondays when I tackle all those things. We have a few "fun" family things I like to do, but those end up being about once a month.

    My biggest thing was embracing "divide and conquer." The whole family does not go to every sporting activity or band performance. Even if we are all available it might not be what everyone needs at that time. DH goes to enough events, but I'm usually the spectator. DH's better help at home for the sibling working on a big school project or doing house projects. Even our fun family outings have started to only involve the kids who can come.

    Way before kids, I used to feel like DH and I had lost the "fun" part of our weekends. We started intentionally not even going home after work on Friday afternoons and having a date night. Sometimes going home would be just enough of a drag. So much better to start the date night early, end early, sleep in a little bit on Saturday and still have a full day ahead.

  6. #16
    Dayzy is offline Silver level (200+ posts)
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    My weekends are anything but structured. Some times there's a Girl Scout event, sometimes a BSA event. Sometimes I need to run to Ikea. Sometimes I need to clean out the shed. There are weekends I take the time to make a huge dinner and other weekends I order a pizza.My weekdays are pretty well structured so my weekends need flexibility so I can do what needs to be done at that time.

  7. #17
    basil is offline Sapphire level (2000+ posts)
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    A lot of times we will have family over for dinner on Friday night. I don't cook on Fridays so always take out, usually fun times with all the kids running around together. DH works almost every other weekend, so fairly often he is not around much.

    Saturday there are usually some sort of kid activities, though sort of depends on pandemic stuff lately. We have been doing soccer lately, which I think is my favorite sport to watch. It's one of the only chances I have to connect with other parents in my town too.

    Sunday is my current bugaboo. I can't quite ever seem to strike the right balance. I want to do fun things - I want to go go go! But a lot of times my kids do not want to - they'd rather sit and watch Disney+. So it's some pressure between finding something we will all enjoy AND getting "stuff" done like shopping and cooking. I usually end the day feeling either like we didn't do anything worthwhile or I didn't get enough "stuff" done. I've just been so aware of how short our time with them left in our home can be, and I want to make sure we enjoy the time we have as much as possible. But instead we kind of end up in an endless loop of me suggesting things that they don't want to do, me getting frustrated because we didn't do anything at all. If we weren't going to do anything fun, we'd have done well to do something necessary, but neither happens. If we do go out to do something, then at least some of the time the kids end up squabbling and not actually having any fun which feeds into the cycle. Then Sunday night I start feeling sad for my wasted weekend.
    DS- 8/11
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  8. #18
    bisous is offline Red Diamond level (10,000+ posts)
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    Thank you so much!! I'm going to review each of these posts. Some general questions/themes I wanted to address really quick. First, I am not one to judge what you do on your weekend! If it works for you that's perfect! My weekends don't feel like they are working for me and I've gone back and forth and tried different things so I'm trying to get a sense of how to tweak it further from some real life examples! I'm not looking to be "successful" in the traditional sense. (I'm not trying to be a tech titan, or a billionaire or anything like that!) I just want to feel peaceful and productive on my weekends. I look forward to Mondays (who does that?) so I feel like even though my weeks are humble they are "successful" for me.

    I crave structure. I like to relax but can't unless my environment is very orderly. My house is small so kids in messy jammies making messes is not my happy place. And my small space requires very little in the way of actual cleaning but a whole lot in the way of organizing and reordering. I do want my people to have a good weekend too. I'll write more later but have to head into my productive Monday morning sesh, lol.

    ETA: I also want balance for my kids. And there are at least 3 people in my house (including DH) who are ADHD so I become the "heavy" for getting ANYTHING done. Even fun stuff. It is emotionally taxing to be the "driver" for the whole weekend for two days straight. I enjoy my Sundays a lot if I have a good Saturday.
    Last edited by bisous; 4 Weeks Ago at 11:41 AM.

  9. #19
    AnnieW625's Avatar
    AnnieW625 is online now Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by bisous View Post
    ÖÖ

    I crave structure. I like to relax but can't unless my environment is very orderly. My house is small so kids in messy jammies making messes is not my happy place. And my small space requires very little in the way of actual cleaning but a whole lot in the way of organizing and reordering. I do want my people to have a good weekend too. I'll write more later but have to head into my productive Monday morning sesh, lol.

    ETA: I also want balance for my kids. And there are at least 3 people in my house (including DH) who are ADHD so I become the "heavy" for getting ANYTHING done. Even fun stuff. It is emotionally taxing to be the "driver" for the whole weekend for two days straight. I enjoy my Sundays a lot if I have a good Saturday.
    Is it harder for you because you really only have one day on a weekend vs. two because Sunday is always so planned out? I know our friends/neighbors growing up were members of your church and they often werenít available until after 3 pm on Sundays. They only had one option for church; 9 am and they would be home by noon and then they had lunch and family time until around 3 pm. So essentially their Sunday was always planned for them.

    Is there a local support group or FB group for your religion? There has to be other ways to keep this all organized and you arenít the only one with a larger family either so there has to be other tips.


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  10. #20
    SnuggleBuggles is offline Black Diamond level (25,000+ posts)
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    Quote Originally Posted by bisous View Post
    Thank you so much!! I'm going to review each of these posts. Some general questions/themes I wanted to address really quick. First, I am not one to judge what you do on your weekend! If it works for you that's perfect! My weekends don't feel like they are working for me and I've gone back and forth and tried different things so I'm trying to get a sense of how to tweak it further from some real life examples! I'm not looking to be "successful" in the traditional sense. (I'm not trying to be a tech titan, or a billionaire or anything like that!) I just want to feel peaceful and productive on my weekends. I look forward to Mondays (who does that?) so I feel like even though my weeks are humble they are "successful" for me.

    I crave structure. I like to relax but can't unless my environment is very orderly. My house is small so kids in messy jammies making messes is not my happy place. And my small space requires very little in the way of actual cleaning but a whole lot in the way of organizing and reordering. I do want my people to have a good weekend too. I'll write more later but have to head into my productive Monday morning sesh, lol.

    ETA: I also want balance for my kids. And there are at least 3 people in my house (including DH) who are ADHD so I become the "heavy" for getting ANYTHING done. Even fun stuff. It is emotionally taxing to be the "driver" for the whole weekend for two days straight. I enjoy my Sundays a lot if I have a good Saturday.
    Seems like that last point could easily be solved with a family meeting. Everyone share their goals and ideas then divvy it up in a way that everyone is clear what is going to happen on the weekend. If people need to do something then they can plan accordingly. Like on Wednesday think through chores, projects and the fun stuff. Make a plan. Share the plan. Have the kids get involved with the planning. I think if everyone gets on the same page and knows what the plan is that itíll go smoothly. Itía like planning a vacation with an itinerary.


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