Summer camp, thoughts?

[DualvansMommy]

Your struggle as a parent and as a doctor is real and valid. Your kids concerns are valid too, but that is their reality of having 2 working parents. One summer of YMCA won’t kill them, but I liked pp suggestion of looking into sleep away camps especially think your oldest would enjoy that more, and supervision is usually much higher standard too vs Y’s or local camps supervision.

Cannot really highly recommend sleep away camps. My oldest went to 2 different speciality sleep away camps and loved it so much! This year, due to our overseas travel and another local weeklong travel, the kids prefer just one week of sleep away camp.

So I think for you; between your own family vacation, beach vacation at their grandparents and sleepaway camp is a nice compromise. You can always hire babysitter home from college breaks for those local camps with weird hours. I do that and will again for my youngest and my oldest is not doing local camp this summer for first time since started going rec camp at 6 years old.


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[DualvansMommy]

I almost PMed you because my goal is truly not to make anyone feel bad about anything but I wouldn't want my child at one of those camps but I do want you to have an opportunity to listen to people rebut this POV of mine so you get all the sides. I have been to too many public pools, zoos, parks etc with those camps present and FWIW, I do think the kids look safe and happy! I just don't like the idea of them being supervised by teenagers who seem a lot more interested in each other than the kids for hours a day. I feel really differently about schools and daycares and maybe even specialized camps though I can see why a nanny would be necessary to facilitate those types of experiences. My niece and nephew attend those camps and my sister loves them and her kids love attending. But maybe it is just because my kids are difficult I want more for them. They especially prioritize downtime. So much of this is about personal preferences and details and again this is not meant to be a judgment on anyone. There could be a lot of judging on my parenting and prioritizing which I'm acutely aware of!

I prioritize being at home both because my kids are difficult and I feel they require a more intensive and skilled caregiver, but also because I don't contribute nearly on the same level either to the betterment of the world or to my family's economy to make the trade off worth it! My sister works in a fulfilling job that she loves and her kids love going to the YMCA camps.

Why would you post this knowing OP is a doctor with a spouse with their own fulltime busy career? She doesn’t have your choice nor luxury to stay home this summer. She is probably very aware of public spaces and supervision by teenagers, more so as a doctor i’d imagine too. So the objective is what? Make her feel more guilty? Your post was very icky coming from huge place of choice.


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[bisous]

Why would you post this knowing OP is a doctor with a spouse with their own fulltime busy career? She doesn’t have your choice nor luxury to stay home this summer. She is probably very aware of public spaces and supervision by teenagers, more so as a doctor i’d imagine too. So the objective is what? Make her feel more guilty? Your post was very icky coming from huge place of choice.


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Honestly, because she asked and I thought it is fair to give my true response. I would give the same one to a friend. I tried to note that my circumstances and priorities are different. I also didn't necessarily see her post as a "camp or quit" question. Perhaps there's another way around it which, if I were in her position, I'd consider trying to find and which other posters are also pointing out. I also noted that plenty of people are extremely happy with camps including my sister. I did hesitate to post at first, but decided to because when I post a question I do want all the sides explored and also hope that these boards are a safe place to post a diversity of opinions. I honestly wasn't trying to offend anyone!

[AnnieW625]

DH isn't asking me to quit my job or making me feel guilty. The kids don't necessarily get a say, and they've never experienced a world where we didn't both work. They didn't ask me to stay home, they just want their old nanny back, but I don't think that can happen.

We both have considered giving up our careers because burnout is real, and medicine just all around sucks right now. And we can easily live on one income. But I think ultimately it may be me who walks away, or at least cuts way back to some per diem shifts. Both because my practice is easier to leave, and I'll because I'll do a better job of household management than he would.

Okay. I just read your sentence about your kids and your Dh making you feel guilty about this and maybe I assumed to much.

That is awesome that you are able to potentially leave a well regarded career and live on one income. That isn’t a reality for many of us here and at the times when DD1 was in elementary school I wished there was a way I could quit my job and be a sahm because that was the reality in our previous VHCOL area, but it wasn’t the reality for us and it sucked big time because I was frustrated with my job at that point. Parents at our old school weren’t the norm when it came to child care the dual income families were either cops, firefighters, nurses, or doctors who worked odd hours by choice and or had parents available to serve as child care. There were also a fair amount of parents who were a good 10+ years older (born in the early to mid 60s vs. the mid to late 70s for DH and myself) than us so they bought their homes in the late 80s-late 90s when houses were still affordable in our area so by the time they had kids they could pay for a nanny or have a SAHM).


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[Philly Mom]

All of their friends have either a SAH parent, or WFH parent. The WFH thing has gotten so prevalent post-pandemic especially in these longer commute suburb areas.

Yes, but even with both of those things, around here, most kids go to camp. I could not WFH with my kids home all summer. I love camp and would think about doing sleep away for kids your kids' ages. Change is hard. they will be more than fine once they do it. I would find out for real though if there is a camp that lots of people in your town use. For me, there are 5 or so camps that lots of people use that aren't specialized to a certain activity. My kids loved their day camp.

[MSWR0319]

They will be fine at the YMCA! The one here just started doing summer camp again last summer after having to shut down day care/camps during covid. The kids and parents all loved it! Ours has a theme each week and activities to go along with it. Even parents who were SAHP were sending their kids because they heard of friends who were having fun. Most of the kids are going into some type of education or child care career. I wouldn't worry at all about their safety or the kids being more interested in themselves like someone else mentioned. I don't find that's usually the case at all, unless you get a few bad apples which you can certainly get anywhere. Someone who is not wanting to be with kids all day is more than likely not even going to interview for that kind of job. It would be miserable if you don't enjoy kids!

If you're worried about lack of downtime, I would simply ask the director of the program about downtime. There may be some time built into the day for "quiet time" or a time where the kids could just chill and read instead of participating in whatever activity is going on at the moment. It may not be the amount of downtime they are used to, but they certainly won't be going all of the time, so I think there may be a way to work in some downtime.

[hillview]

YMCA will be great and give them new skills they otherwise won't develop this summer, meeting new people, making new friends, learning new skills, developing new flexibility in routines. I have TOTALLY BTDT (including sending my boys to camps that were fine but not awesome) and everyone is better for it. I think checking in on down time is a good idea.

[niccig]

Summer camp was non negotiable for DS. He was tired but had fun.

Keep in mind your kids are getting older and while it still seems a long way off, very soon they won’t need childcare. This is a season right now. It won’t always be like this


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[PZMommy]

My kids went to the YMCA summer camp when they were in elem, and I used to work at one when I was in college. It if fun and not like school. Lots of activities, indoors and outdoors. Each week usually has some sort of theme and activities to go with. Also I know this year off site field trips are back in my city (and we are probably the last ones to add those back). It will be fine. You just need to tell your kids they don’t have a choice. It will be an adjustment, but they will be fine.

[essnce629]

I had a blast at YMCA day camp when I was a kid and didn’t mind having to go.


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This!

My mom was a poor single mom so she could only afford 1 week of YMCA day camp my whole childhood, but I had so much fun and wanted to go back so bad. Even at 41 I still look back and remember the fun I had that week!

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