College acceptances...now what?

[WatchingThemGrow]

So DD's had some wins and an early loss to an OOS reach that we knew wasn't a good fit. Yesterday's acceptance made her cry b/c "I didn't reach high enough" by "applying to more selective schools." She later said that she's worked so hard and to only apply and get into schools with a kinder admit rate was short-sighted. Granted, she's still waiting on 2 that meet that criteria, but whatever... Later the proclamation was that she was just being emotional and that she's proud of her accomplishments. It's such a rollercoaster.

Now we face weighing all the Yes schools appropriately to make the best choice. While I joined here for bargains, I don't necessarily think it's the only thing to consider. What all are you considering and what questions, strategies, contingency plans, etc. are you encouraging your college-bound kid to consider? Are you having them make a 4 year plan, a 7 and 10 year plan, etc? How DO you decide which school to say yes to, especially in the midst of the FAFSA debacle? I don't want finances to be the main focus, as we've done public education up to this point, and we really want to set DD off on the right foot. I feel like I was just thrown to the wolves at a giant institution without a lot of support. I want this season to go well for her. If a grad program is likely on the horizon, it seems wise to include that in the whole conversation, right? If money is an issue to an extent, do you go big ($) for grad and not undergrad? I need some "rules" to follow here for the next month while everything is figured out!

[hbridge]

We are a huge believer in going where the student feels comfortable. DC chose the college they felt most at home. The first time they visited they said this was their first choice. Things switched up a bit for a time and it fell to #2, but revisiting the other school, moved the original back to #1. This is very much a safety school and DC got into much more competitive schools, but like this one the best. It is affordable and will stretch the budget to include some grad school.

Way back when, I made a similar decision, choosing a state school over an ivy. Both for affordability and I didn't like culture of the ivy.

When DC was choosing, DH starting talking about choosing his college. He also chose an in-state flagship school over an out of state.

Take the finances out of consideration for now and have your DD try to rank the schools in accordance to where she wants to attend. Then start revisiting the campuses.

It is such a difficult process.

[ahisma]

It's so much to process. DS1 is a junior, and DD (25yo) is on a non-traditional path, so we're not fully there yet.

Our approach is to find an undergrad option that is a good fit, and finance is a strong component of that. I rarely consider where degrees are from when hiring, nor do I see that as terribly consequential in my work. I do want my kids to have a positive experience, but I don't think that a high reach school necessarily = better experience. Frankly, I'm carrying a ton of student loan debt myself, and don't want that for my kids, so we'll be looking for places where they can pursue their interests, feel comfortable in their own skin, and exit without notable debt. I think for many kids, looking beyond undergrad is a bit of a crapshoot - so much can and does change. That said, my mantra right now is to save money in undergrad to make space for grad school. DS1 heard that reinforced as a visit day yesterday, which was nice (residential honors college at a state flagship).

What DS1 really wants is an $80K SLAC that is NOT happening unless he chases massive merit. He can likely get it down to $38K through merit, but that's still not in our range. I'm sort of waiting to see if he's motivated to chase outside merit to make that happen - so far, he's not.

[AnnieW625]

Dd1 has six acceptances, and two rejections so far; the rejections are from schools with around a 8-12% admit rate (depending on which report you read). She was bummed about one for sure and knew the other would be a stretch for us if she was admitted (but still bummed). She is still waiting to hear back from two (one historically releases the last Friday in March, and the other has been admitting freshman for the last two weeks but hasn’t released rejections or their waitlist yet; and TBH we have no idea if they are done with admits). Dd1 has gotten really good merit from one private school which makes it very attractive, received a notice the other day that she was admitted to the honors college at a large state university, and qualified for merit aid from another private (just not as much as the other), and received a scholarship for a tuition discount to the one out of state school she applied to.

We are attending an admitted student day event today, and have three others scheduled. If she is admitted to the other two schools she may go back and visit them again, but their admitted student days conflict with others.

I am hoping to start my excel sheet here soon but I want to get all of the financial aid paperwork reviewed first and hopefully the admitted student day sessions will help with that .

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[jacksmomtobe]

Your College Bound Kid did a recent podcast about making a college decision. It gives a list of questions for a family to discuss:

https://yourcollegeboundkid.com/2024...-admitted-you/

I think finances play a part especially when future grad school is in the picture. It is one piece of the puzzle. You want to come to a decision that is best for your child and their future. Does your child have the opportunity to go back and visit? Dd is going to accepted students days at her final 3. At least one of the programs is really tailored to her intended field of study and should really give her insight into what her experience will likely be like. Right now she is favoring the most expensive school which seems to be the least advantageous for her academic path but she likes the feel. She however hasn’t seen as much of the other 2 schools.

[georgiegirl]

Agreed with the college bound kid episode. I just listened to it a couple of days ago.

We are fortunate that DD did quite well with admissions so far (still waiting on 2), and last week she got accepted to the ED school that deferred her, and yesterday she got in to a few more great schools. So she’s 99% sure she will go to her ED school. Before selecting that school as ED, we spent a long time weighing pros and cons. We had a chart/list where she compared her top schools. As to the “I should have applied to more selective schools,” DH and I have been discussing it, since based how things are going so far, DD would likely be admitted to an Ivy or two. But we decided early on that is not the atmosphere we think she’d be happy and successful in. We purposefully selected small liberal arts colleges as the focus because of the collaborative, supportive environment. Her #1 choice is top for several reasons: (1) supportive, collaborative environment, (2) small classes with professors who are dedicated to teaching and want you to succeed, (3) less intense vibe that other schools of its class, (4) weather, sunshine and warmth will positively impact DD’s mental health, (5) amazing grad school placement, (6) research opportunities with professors, (7) easy to access (not remote), (8) school is part of a consortium so she has the ability to take classes at other nearby colleges. Only con (that we don’t even care about) is that it doesn’t have the big name recognition of other colleges of its class. We are fortunate that finances aren’t an issue. If DD a hadn’t gotten in to her too choice, then we’d have to bring out the pro/con chart and think more about it.

I’d narrow it down to 2-3 and then try to visit those to get clarity. Our big focus has always been on which school would DD be happiest and most successful at.


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[SnuggleBuggles]

Ds1 made a pro/con chart and ultimately came down to 2 as of April 29 and then he just picked one. His finalists were really different price wise but finances weren't on the table in the discussion (we were fully paying for college and could do either). We just wanted him to pick where he thought he woul dhave the best academic and social experience. It was hard because he never really got to do all the admitted student things or normal senior spring things that could have helped make decisions due to covid closures. There was an early regret 1st semester and he did go back and tour the other school he got into that fall. His admission was held until the end of that 1st semester so he could have easily switched schools. Transfering schools is totally allowed. They don't need to get this choice perfect now nor are they stuck with a choice for 4+ years, at least in our family.

[gatorsmom]

The other poster have included such great info. With ds2 there wasn’t too much to consider. We were prepared to pay for his reach school and he got in so that was a pretty easy decision. The decision was a lot harder two years ago for ds1. He was our first kid to go on his wild ride. When it came down to the final decision he went on a couple of school tours to remind him of the atmosphere. That second trip to the schools made all the difference deciding. He was in a better state of mind the second time he visited.

After ds1 received his acceptance I said the same thing your daughter said about trying to get into more reach schools. But everything turned out fine. The school is a good fit for him.

[hillview]

things we considered
acceptance rate (he really wanted a best he could get into school)
graduation rate (if it is low look to your left and right some % of those kids won't be here in 4 years)
ease of getting to (he applied to some hard to get to places)
he wanted flexibility on major declaration (he applied to mainly SLAC schools)

in the end he got into a school off the wait list and selected it as it was by far the most competitive (lowest acceptance rate). For DS2 it will not be this (he is only a hs sophomore so we are not there yet).

[dogmom]

Having a Junior in college and just going through admissions with my last, I think I lot of this is just displaced anxiety about the future. So much of their last four years , if not more, of their lives have been leading up to this. That’s 20% of their lives. No it’s a big black hole of the future. Because of this I don’t think talking about 4+ year plans are a good idea at this point. Let them get to college and discuss it after the first year.

Both my kids opted for cheaper in state schools, even thought we made it clear we would find a way and not expect them to take on more debt. I am realizing that we are going to be able to support my eldest in growing a round for a semester, which I’m not sure if we could do if he was at a more expensive school. I’ve made it know to my youngest that we will endeavor to provide similar experiences for him.